Gossip is cruel. It destroys lives. It damages self-esteem. It destroys friendships. It breaks up marriages. It weakens families. It is a fundamental violation of one of the Ten Commandments: Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor. If one hasn't got anything nice to say about someone, he ought to shut his trap. --JWR

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Tom Matkin wrote:
This is the post that Natasha is keeping to herself.  It will probably
show up a week or two from now:

I choose to discuss Gossip today.

I tried this out on FAIR and got no response, so I'm sure ZION can do at
least that well.

I stumbled across a three part test for sharing information about people
and sorting out what is appropriate to tell and what is gossip.

You ask yourself these three simple questions:

1. Is this fact about so and so kind?

2.      Do I have undisputable knowledge of it, in other words, is it
true?

3.      Does the person I'm planning to share this with have a need to
know?

Setting aside certain special relationships of a confidential or ethical
nature (for example I can never share things that I learn in my law
office about people, even if they are kind, true and someone might have
a need to know. Likewise a nurse in the hospital has special ethical
responsibilities for what she learns... etc.)  But setting those things
aside the test is that if you can answer yes to any two of the above you
can share it.

For example if it comes to your attention that so and so is pregnant.
That may or may not be a kind thing depending upon the circumstances. If
it's someone you know who has been aching for a child forever and your
source is good (it's true) then you can share that happy news with
others. But if this is about a 14 year old in your ward, you don't tell
anyone else, unless that person has a special need to know. Build your
own scenario, apply the test and then let me know about it, especially
if you think of applications where the test doesn't work. I'm trying to
figure out if it is reliable or not.

That's right. For today G is for Gossip. Of course the best test is in
Ephesians 4:

24 And that ye put on the new man, which after God is created in
righteousness and true holiness.
 25 Wherefore putting away lying, speak every man truth with his
neighbour: for we are members one of another....
 29 Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that
which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto
the hearers.
 30 And grieve not the holy Spirit of God, whereby ye are sealed unto
the day of redemption.
 31 Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil
speaking, be put away from you, with all malice:
 32 And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another,
even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.

Paul certainly emphasizes the truthfulness and kindness part of the
test. The "need to know" part is just meant to deal with those rare
special occasions when unkind things need to be shared.

Tom

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