-Caveat Lector-
(These people may have the full expression of the special "Annunaki
genes". "Live short and be stupid". -- SW)
------- Forwarded Message Follows -------
Date forwarded: Tue, 9 Mar 1999 00:18:26 -0500
Date sent: Mon, 08 Mar 1999 21:23:59 -0800
To: [EMAIL PROTECTED]
From: David Weber <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Subject: [illusions] Darwin Awards
CRIMINAL DARWIN AWARDS
-------------------------------------------------
Colorado Springs:
A guy walked into a little corner store with a shot gun and demanded
all the
cash from the cash drawer.
After the cashier put the cash in a bag, the robber saw a bottle of
scotch
that he wanted behind the counter on the shelf. He told the cashier to
put it
in the bag as well, but he refused and said "Because I don't believe
you are
over 21." The robber said he was, but the clerk still refused to give it
to
him because he didn't believe him. At this point the robber took his
drivers
license out of his wallet and gave it to the clerk. The clerk looked it
over,
and agreed that the man was in fact over 21 and he put the scotch in the
bag.
The robber then ran from the store with his loot.
The cashier promptly called the police and gave the name and address of
the
robber that he got off the license. They arrested the robber two hours
later.
-----------------------------------------------------------
A woman was reporting her car as stolen, and mentioned that there was
a car
phone in it. The policeman taking the report called the phone and told
the
guy that answered that he had read the ad in the
newspaper and wanted to buy the car. They arranged to meet, and the
thief was
arrested.
-------------------------------------------------
A true story out of San Francisco:
A man, wanting to rob a downtown Bank of America,
walked into the branch and wrote "this iz a stikkup. Put all your muny
in
this bag." While standing in line, waiting to give his note to the
teller, he
began to worry that someone had seen him write the note and might call
the
police before he reached the teller window. So he left the Bank of
America
and crossed the street to Wells Fargo. After waiting a few minutes in
line,
he handed his note to the Wells Fargo teller. She read it and,
surmising from
his spelling errors that he was not the brightest light in the harbor,
told
him that she could not accept his stickup note because it was written on
a
Bank of America deposit slip and that he would either have to fill out a
Wells
Fargo deposit slip or go back to Bank of America.
Looking somewhat defeated, the man said "OK" and left. The Wells Fargo
teller
then called the police who arrested the man a few minutes later, as he
was
waiting in line back at Bank of America.
-------------------------------------------------
A motorist was unknowingly caught in an automated speed trap that
measured his
speed using radar and photographed his car. He later received in the
mail a
ticket for $40 and a photo of his car.
Instead of payment, he sent the police department a photograph of $40.
Several days later, he received a letter from the police that contained
another picture...of handcuffs. The motorist promptly sent the money
for the
fine.
-------------------------------------------------
Drug Possession Defendant Christopher Jansen, on trial in March in
Pontiac,
Michigan, said he had been searched without a warrant. The prosecutor
said
the officer didn't need a warrant
because a "bulge" in Christopher's jacket could have been a gun.
Nonsense,
said Christopher, who happened to be wearing the same jacket that day in
court. He handed it over so the judge could see it. The judge
discovered a
packet of cocaine in the pocket and laughed so hard he required a five
minute
recess to compose himself.
-------------------------------------------------
Oklahoma City:
Dennis Newton was on trial for the armed robbery of a convenience store
in a
district court when he fired his lawyer. Assistant district attorney
Larry
Jones said Newton, 47, was doing a fair job of
defending himself until the store manager testified that Newton was the
robber. Newton jumped up, accused the woman of lying and then said, "I
should
of blown your (expletive) head off." The defendant paused, then quickly
added, "if I'd been the one that was there." The jury took 20 minutes to
convict Newton and recommended a 30-year sentence.
-------------------------------------------------
Detroit:
R.C. Gaitlan, 21, walked up to two patrol officers who were showing
their
squad car computer equipment to children in a Detroit neighborhood. When
he
asked how the system worked, the officer asked him for identification.
Gaitlan gave them his drivers license, they entered it into the
computer, and
moments later they arrested Gaitlan because information on the screen
showed
Gaitlan was wanted for a two-year-old armed
robbery in St. Louis, Missouri.
-------------------------------------------------
Another from Detroit:
A pair of Michigan robbers entered a record shop nervously waving
revolvers.
The first one shouted, "Nobody move!" When his partner moved, the
startled
first bandit shot him.
-------------------------------------------------
Cigars and Insurance
A Charlotte, NC, man having purchased a case of very rare, very
Expensive
cigars, insured them against fire among other things. Within a month,
having
smoked his entire stockpile of cigars and without having made even his
first
premium payment on the policy, the man filed a claim against the
insurance
company. In his claim, the man stated the cigars were lost "in a series
of
small fires." The insurance company refused to pay, citing the obvious
reason
that the man had consumed the cigars in the normal fashion.
The man sued.... and won. In delivering the ruling the judge agreeing
that
the claim was frivolous, stated nevertheless that the man held a policy
from
the company in which it had warranted that the cigars were insurable and
also
guaranteed that it would insure against fire, without defining what it
considered to be "unacceptable fire," and was obligated to pay the
claim.
Rather than endure a lengthy and costly appeal process the insurance
company
accepted the ruling and paid the man $15,000 for the rare cigars he lost
in
"the fires." After the man cashed the check, however, the company had
him
arrested on 24 counts of arson. With his own insurance claim and
testimony
from the previous case being used against him, the man was convicted of
intentionally burning his insured property and sentenced to 24 m
onths in
jail and a $24,000 fine
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Steve Wingate
California Director
SKYWATCH INTERNATIONAL
TODAY'S MP3: 807 Funk, by Chauncey Canfield
http://www.mp3.com/music/Jazz/978.html
ANOMALOUS IMAGES AND UFO FILES
http://www.anomalous-images.com
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