-Caveat Lector-
SkeptiNews 990603b - - - - - - - - - - - All The News That's Fit To Question
: Passages starting with ':' are editorial comments to provoke discussion.
: Nothing contained herein is ever endorsed for truth, accuracy or meaning.
: Several souls were sold to Satan during the production of this bulletin.
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# EU orders Belgian poultry destroyed. BRUSSELS (AP) - In its biggest food
scandal since mad cow disease, the European Union called for the destruction
of Belgian chickens, eggs and any byproducts that may contain cancer-causing
dioxin. Belgium's dioxin scandal grew when the gov't issued a slaughter ban
on pigs, fearing that many are also infected by the same contaminated animal
feed. Europeans scrambled to clear shelves of all things Belgian that had a
whiff of chicken or egg on it. 8 tons of Belgian chickens were incinerated
in Greece and Russian border guards were ready to pounce on any Belgian
chickens. See www.infobeat.com/stories/cgi/story.cgi?id=2559779247-2b9
: Have you ever pounced on a chicken? Were you caught? Have you destroyed
anything Belgian lately? Will you start? Do the voices in your head approve?
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# Feds warn of mad cow donors. GAITHERSBURG, Md. (AP) Americans who visited
Britain frequently at the height of the mad cow disease scare should be for-
bidden to donate blood back home, a federal panel recommended. The advisers
to the FDA expressed concern about a theoretical risk that a similar human
brain disease might be able to spread through blood. Panel members stressed
their vote did not mean that frequent travelers to Britain are at risk of
getting a fatal illness linked to mad cow disease or of spreading it through
their blood. The problem is scientists don't know if the illness can be
spread that way. www.infobeat.com/stories/cgi/story.cgi?id=2559779209-82c
: Have you been to Britain? Should you be quarantined, embargoed, destroyed?
Should everyone crossing borders have their blood tested? ETs too? How?
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# YES, THERE IS A MALE G-SPOT. We've all heard of the female "G-spot." Well,
according to Cosmopolitan magazine, there's a male G-spot, too. It is the
area at the base of the scrotum, which a partner can massage to create pres-
ure on the prostate gland, which is very sensitive during arousal and ejac-
ulation. http://www.healthcentral.com/drdean/DeanFullTextTopics.cfm?ID=11500
: Do male or female Reptilioids or Republicans have G-spots too? Should all
entities, human or otherwise, be sexually aroused? Do orgasms promote peace?
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# Scientist ties knots in DNA strands. (AP) Using laser beams like tweezers,
a Japanese researcher has tied incredibly tiny knots in strands of DNA. Just
now, this is little more than a gee-whiz trick. But researchers envision
using the technique someday to tie off parts of cells to study their
workings. http://www.infobeat.com/stories/cgi/story.cgi?id=2559777020-88a
: Would you like to have knots tied in your DNA? Are you knotted already?
Would you rather have your DNA knotted by researchers, hobbyists, aliens?
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# A new technique to count the number of planetary systems in our galaxy:
Rather than directly measuring the impact of a planet on its star (by
measuring the wobble of the star), look for effects that occur when a large
planet is engulfed by an expanding star (red giant). Such a star gives of
excess infrared energy, spins more rapidly than it should, and shows high
amounts of lithium in its spectrum. http://exosci.com/news/159.html
: Have you counted planetary systems lately? What's your technique? How many
planetary systems are enough? Do you trade your extras? Are they for sale?
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# Star Goes Wild. CHICAGO (AP) One of the most famous stars in the southern
night sky, Eta Carinae, has suddenly doubled in brightness. Astronomers call
the behavior puzzling but suspect the star may be undergoing a massive erup-
tion, much as it did over 150 years ago. Instruments focused on the star
hint its energy output has doubled or tripled in the last year and a half.
Eta Carinae was a routine part of the sky in the Southern Hemisphere until
the 1840s when it suddenly erupted with a massive outflow of energy, dust
and gas. See http://www.infobeat.com/stories/cgi/story.cgi?id=2559778217-f3f
: Is Eta Carinae being used as a directed-beam weapon in the ZetaReticulan-
Reptilioid war? Have you caused any stellar eruptions lately? Why? Where?
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# Rabid dogs attacking Afghanis. KABUL, Afghanistan (AP) - Packs of rabid
dogs roaming war-ravaged Kabul are attacking people and infecting them with
rabies. In the last 5 days 24 people, many childrn, were treated for rabies.
In nearby Ghazni province, where treatment was unavailable, 90 people died
of rabies last month. Officials in Kabul are calling this an emergency. They
didn't have figures but say that many bite victims have died, either because
they arrived at hospitals too late for treatment or were unable to buy the
medicine. See www.infobeat.com/stories/cgi/story.cgi?id=2559782105-754
: Is it Allah's Will that rabid dogs attack Afghanis? Is Allah *really*
pissed-off at someone? Are any of your deities vengeful? Are they rabid?
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# Pope protects new parking garage. VATICAN CITY (AP) - Pope JP2 presided
over the inauguration of an underground parking garage at Vatican City,
invoking divine protection for the building, the cars and the people who
will park there. Workers finished the 3-story garage in time for millennial
celebrations expected to bring tens of millions of pilgrims to Rome. The
underground garage makes Vatican City a more functional and welcoming place,
without lessening the amount of green space in the city, the pope said. ###
: Is it Allah's Will that the parking garage be blessed? Would you rather
park in a spot consecrated by a Pope, Ayatollah, Patriarch, Scientologist?
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# CELL PHONES MAKE FOR SPEEDY REACTIONS. There is still no solid evidence
that cell phones are dangerous to our health - but here is an interesting
study that said they might speed up our reactions. Maybe, say researchers,
it's due to a slight warming of the brain - similar to what happens when
we exercise. www.healthcentral.com/drdean/DeanFullTextTopics.cfm?ID=11360
# COMMONSENSE AND CELL PHONES. The Calif. Medical Ass'n is raising awareness
of the dangers of driving distractions. While the CMA cites a study about
cell phones and driving, they also note that other activities can cause
accidents. www.healthcentral.com/drdean/DeanFullTextTopics.cfm?ID=11361
: Have cellphones altered your brain, affected your driving, enveloped your
skull, annoyed those around you, channeled the mind-control rays better?
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"Moscow can be a pretty cold kind of place, especially in winter, that's
why I was glad I'd struck up a conversation with Gennady when he playfully
flicked a graying and painfully worn bath towel at me in the men's changing
room at the Moskva River Polar Bear Swimming Club." --Matthew Cope
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