dana depp
Fri, 23 Mar 2007 19:55:36 -0800
I think South Asians have a very hard time in the Gulf region.
Anglo-Indians have a hard time, too.
I think South Asian men are the most handsome, but I also admire South Asian
culture and I resist the reductionist belief that it's racist for a Caucasian
to prefer Afghan, Indian, Iranian, Pakistani (etc.) men.
Having said that, "gay" culture is based on a very middle class consumerist
mindset, where "lifestyle" reigns supreme and relationships tend to be very
status-oriented. That "commodification-culture" opens the door for all of the
classist and racist daemons.
STUART SAXTON <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
I'm a mixed chap. anglo/indian...in the true mix, publicly school
educated
---------------------------------
From: "Peter Joseph Swanson" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Reply-To: gay_bombay@yahoogroups.com
To: gay_bombay@yahoogroups.com
Subject: Re: g_b Racism still an issue in the gay community ( ARTICLE)
Date: Wed, 21 Mar 2007 14:08:44 -0000
Everybody is racist. We all judge with our eyes, and we all have our
own cultural things that we favor. It's natural to be that way
but "natural" doesn't mean it's right, just and fair. I think we can
overcome racism a lot by just trying to understand why we have those
fears and attractions that we have. Then we can laugh at ourselves
about it first. Laughing at yourself about things is a good first
step in growing.
Peter
--- In gay_bombay@yahoogroups.com, veno anderson <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
> Hi Karwan,
> There still are some of us white guys who think darker men are da
bomb. Their features and color are loved and admired. Sounds like
reverse racism but I only look at personals for Asians South and East
and Latinos, your're among the handsomest men around.
> Veno
>
> karwan khursheed <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
> You are absolutely right! Here in Duabi, its the same
like britain.
>
> I am from delhi working in Dubai for last two years. The first
question they will ask you is whats your nationality?
>
> When you will say I am Indian. they will say sorry I am not into
asian. sometimes no reply.
> I noticed it many times. Condition of Indian gays specially who
are dark skin is very bad. They are most of the time neglected.
>
> Sometimes I taught them a lesson. The same guy who didnt chat
with me knowing me Indian, chatted with me knowing that I am
European. I made my id as 27-Eurpopean in mirc and I got the reply of
that guy. He gave me his msn is and we chatted. He gave me his no
without seeing me but i refused him saying sorry you are not my type.
>
> Most of the Arabs guy here are looking for Arbs. Few european
like Indian.
>
> But I feel race is not the main issue.
>
> The main issue is how you look and how your stats is.......
>
> rgds
> zaid
>
>
>
>
>
>
> ----- Original Message ----
> From: walnut <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
> To: gay_bombay@yahoogroups.com
> Sent: Wednesday, March 14, 2007 8:59:15 PM
> Subject: g_b Racism still an issue in the gay community ( ARTICLE)
>
>
>
> Comment: Racism still an issue in the gay
community
>
> I've encountered more cold shoulders and "thanks, no thanks" on Old
Compton Street than Dating Direct or Gaydar.
>
>
>
>
> Click Here
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> 8th March 2007 13:37
> Comment
>
> Since coming to London last year, student Balaji Ravichandran has
been impressed with the freedom that gay men enjoy here. As an
Indian, though, Balaji has noticed that white gay men's attitudes to
a guy like him can at times leave something to be desired.
>
> "Sorry, not my type." This is probably the most frequented reply
I've received on Gaydar - or "DismayDar," as I choose to call it.
>
> Personally, I have nothing against the cruising website always busy
with people (gay, straight, or otherwise) craving for sex.
>
> It is, in many ways, much better than the hypocrisy of people
claiming to want longer relationships and not bothering to call again
or return your messages.
>
> Indeed, having been in Britain only for a year now, I've rather
enjoyed my frequent flings, thanks to the occasional few who don't
mind my skin colour, or those who do not have "Caucasians only" in
the "Looking for" column of their profiles.
>
> Yet, having used it for almost a year, along with a host of other
dating websites, and having been a part of the "gay scene" (an
unfortunate epithet) in London for an equal amount of time, I can't
help thinking that there is subtle, yet very palpable racism within
the community.
>
> When I mention this to many of my gay friends in the UK, they
refuse to believe it. They point out that there are a significant
number of interracial relationships within the gay community. I
wholly agree.
>
> What's more, most of the men I've been with were white. In fact, I
once admitted that if one wanted to see real and overt racism, one
must go to the Berlin gay scenehow would you feel if people in their
hundreds refuse to acknowledge you even exist?
>
> That's exactly how it felt - for me, anyway.
>
> But to say that Britain is highly tolerant and that it is not as
bad as some other European nations is not to say that a person with
coloured skin is treated in exactly the same manner as a white would.
>
> Far from it. If you don't believe me, log on to any gay dating
website and read the profiles of a few white people at random.
>
> You are more likely to see the following epithets than any
discernible description of themselves or their prospective partners
(sexual or otherwise) "Sorry, not into Asians;" "Sorry, coloured
skin just doesn't work for me;" "Whites only, no offence."
>
> An oxymoron, if there ever was one.
>
>
> Could this be something related to the realms of online dating
alone? Not exactly.
>
> I've encountered more cold shoulders and "thanks, no thanks" on Old
Compton Street than Dating Direct or Gaydar. Admittedly, this may not
be race-related at all.
>
> Many a gay man refuses even to acknowledge another's presence in
busy gay clubs these days. No smiles, no exchanges of conversations -
people seem to move about in cohorts drinking and dancing, with
little else being accomplished.
>
> With more people flocking to online dating, the social side of bars
seems fast diminishing.
>
> Personally and professionally, I've seldom encountered racism in
Britain. The episode surrounding Shilpa Shetty is nothing more than a
media gimmick to which unsuspecting TV addicts paid too much
attention.
>
> However, when it comes to establishing a connection deeper than
friendship, and one that ventures into a long-term commitment,
hesitancy does seem to set in.
>
> Strangely, this is not related just to whites, as some within the
Asian and black community (usually fed up with racism) often assume.
>
> A number of black and East Asian men have told me personally that
they'd rather prefer to settle down with people of their own race
than any other.
>
> I find this whole scenario quite disturbingnot least because in
some ways, it labels people on the basis of their colour, and
personally, I'm opposed to labelling people on the basis of anything
but their individual selves.
>
> I wince when someone describes me as "Asian," and some of my
British-born friends do not like the label "British Asians" either.
>
> "We're just British," they say. Some think I'm in denial about my
racial roots, as are my "British Asian" friends.
>
> But, my racial roots basically have nothing to do with the person
that I am.
>
> I feel insulted when websites like Gaydar try and construct an
identity in my profile, based on my race, and that of my prospective
partner.
>
> That ethnicity and race is still a column in all profile
applications is a cause for concern when it should have no influence
in deciding any aspect of people's personal and professional lives.
>
> With the exception of crude racists, I think most people would
agree.
>
> I'm all for freedom of speech. If someone is uncomfortable with the
fact that the colour of my skin is brown, let him say so (if I hit on
him) and stay away from me.
>
> What I cannot digest is the fact that even in this day and age, and
in a tolerant society like Britain, race still plays a substantial
role in people's lives. Gay people, of all, must know the perils of
discrimination, subtle or overt.
>
> That a significant proportion of the gay community subscribe to
discrimination, in itself, is regrettable. What's worse, many
websites don't seem to mind either.
>
>
>
>
>
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