Title: Message
 
As I've Grown: 

  I've learned that you cannot make
  someone love you. All you can do is
  stalk them and hope they panic and give in.

  I've learned that no matter how much I care,
  some people are just assholes.

  I've learned that it takes years
  to build up trust, and it only takes
  suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.

  I've learned that you can get by
  on charm for about fifteen minutes.
  After that, you'd better have a big willy
  or huge boobs.

  I've learned that you shouldn't
  compare yourself to others - they are
  more screwed up than you think.

  I've learned that you can keep vomiting
  long after you think you 're finished.

  I've learned that we are responsible
  for what we do, unless we are celebrities.

  I've learned that regardless of
  how hot and steamy a relationship is at
  first, the passion fades, and there had better
  be a lot of money to take its place.

  I've learned that 99% of the time when something
  isn't working in your house, one of your kids did it

  I've learned that the people you care most
  about in life are taken from you too soon
  and all the less important ones just never go away.

  I've learned to say "F--- 'em if they can't take a joke"
  in 6 languages.

  Pass this along to 5 friends...trust me,
  they'll appreciate it. Who knows, maybe
  Something good will happen.
  If not...tough shit.


THE END
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