Hi,

I usually don't send jokes to the list as everyone knows them all anyway.
But this one is pretty new, and based on the classic "if OS were airlines".
A good start but still needs some work IMO.


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If Linux Distributions Were Airlines

Red Hat Airlines:

The standard in air travel. Most people have flown Red Hat Air at one point
or other. Some people like it and some people hate it and move on to one of
the other airlines. Passengers are all treated the same; they get stuck in
their seats and told not to ask questions -- everything will be taken care
of for them. They should just sit back, relax, and not touch of the fancy
controls under any circumstances, lest they send the plane into a tailspin.
Red Hat Airlines is fabulously rich.

Mandrake Airlines:

Mandrake bought a truckload of planes from Red Hat, put new engines in them,
re-painted them, and now run their own airline. Considered by many to be the
most friendly airline for first-time flyers.

Corel Airlines:

A new player on the scene, Corel Air thinks it can be the airline of choice
for a new generation of first-time pleasure flyers, and maybe even lure in
some business travelers too. Their planes are big, brightly painted, and
like Red Hat's they protect the innocent, clueless passengers from the
dangerous buttons, switches and blinkenlights of the cockpit.

SuSe Airlines:

An airline out of Europe that tries to be everything for everyone and
succeeds -- to a degree. Recently paid a huge sum of money to use a comic
strip in its promotional material. (And after they finally named the
lizard...)

Caldera OpenAirlines:

These guys go out of their way to make things comfortable for the business
user. They've got a pretty terminal, pretty planes, really good in-flight
movies, etc. But I had a bad experience with these guys once. They lost my
luggage. Quite a mess, really. Ah well, such is life. I never flew with them
again.

SlackAIR:

>From a distance, their planes look just like everyone elses. But up close
you can tell that they haven't been painted and little bits of wire stick
out here and there. But onboard, the seats are comfortable enough and there
are plenty of stewardesses available to help you readjust your seat if you
manage to break it. There is no in-flight movie but if you get bored you are
always welcome up in the cockpit. The pilots will be glad to let you try and
fly the plane and are happy to let you push whatever buttons you want, even
if you don't know what you're doing. Generally, novice flyers avoid SlackAIR
as they've heard horror stories about newbies pressing the wrong button and
causing the plane to explode.

Debian Airlines:

They have a single type of airplane; a huge sucker weighing 2400 tons and
carrying just about everything you can imagine. They've got kitchen sinks,
massage parlors, a paintball arena, and 294 types of cheese for sale in the
onboard, 24-hour supermarket. You can see from the terminal they have a huge
team of technicians working on their fleet, poking and prodding. Debian Air
is the only choice for some: everything onboard is built 100% by union
workers -- no shoddy, possibly dangerous, imports here.

For completeness, let's throw in some BSD...

NetAIR:

Pretty standard fare, with one primary selling point: they'll fly anywhere.
There isn't anywhere they won't go. War zones, political hotbeds, Canada --
all fair game. Of course, they keep their planes in good condition and up to
date.

FreeAIR:

Probably the most popular of the alternative airlines, FreeAIR is a favorite
of business travelers and, well, pretty much everyone. They offer the same
services as everyone else and have the same devoted following as the other
airlines. Purportedly a good choice for first time BSD flyers.

OpenAIR:

SecureAIR really would be more appropriate. They've got armed guards at
every door, armed guards on the plane -- even a fighter escort. Passengers
are treated pretty respectably as long as they are willing to go through the
security checkpoints
 
 
---



--
Chen Shapira    Web Developer and Linux Activist
Hackers do for love what other people wouldn't do for money

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