Re: [CTRL] Two Cows (humor)
-Caveat Lector- My vote is for surrealism.which is the system we seem to be living under. And may explain my general state of contentment, in spite of what many might consider flaws and lacks in my current lifestyle. My giraffe is having a ball. sno0wl DECLARATION DISCLAIMER == CTRL is a discussion and informational exchange list. Proselyzting propagandic screeds are not allowed. Substancenot soapboxing! These are sordid matters and 'conspiracy theory', with its many half-truths, misdirections and outright frauds is used politically by different groups with major and minor effects spread throughout the spectrum of time and thought. That being said, CTRL gives no endorsement to the validity of posts, and always suggests to readers; be wary of what you read. CTRL gives no credeence to Holocaust denial and nazi's need not apply. Let us please be civil and as always, Caveat Lector. Archives Available at: http://home.ease.lsoft.com/archives/CTRL.html http:[EMAIL PROTECTED]/ To subscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SUBSCRIBE CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED] To UNsubscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SIGNOFF CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED] Om
Re: [CTRL] Two Cows (humor)
-Caveat Lector- fish. Sno0wl wrote: -Caveat Lector- My vote is for surrealism.which is the system we seem to be living under. And may explain my general state of contentment, in spite of what many might consider flaws and lacks in my current lifestyle. My giraffe is having a ball. sno0wl DECLARATION DISCLAIMER == CTRL is a discussion and informational exchange list. Proselyzting propagandic screeds are not allowed. Substancenot soapboxing! These are sordid matters and 'conspiracy theory', with its many half-truths, misdirections and outright frauds is used politically by different groups with major and minor effects spread throughout the spectrum of time and thought. That being said, CTRL gives no endorsement to the validity of posts, and always suggests to readers; be wary of what you read. CTRL gives no credeence to Holocaust denial and nazi's need not apply. Let us please be civil and as always, Caveat Lector. Archives Available at: http://home.ease.lsoft.com/archives/CTRL.html http:[EMAIL PROTECTED]/ To subscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SUBSCRIBE CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED] To UNsubscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SIGNOFF CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED] Om RFC822 header --- Return-Path: [EMAIL PROTECTED] Received: from lists.aol.com ([152.163.216.26]) by zag.workstation.org.uk (Netscape Mail Server v2.02) with ESMTP id AAC241 for [EMAIL PROTECTED]; Fri, 8 Jan 1999 05:10:50 + Received: from LISTSERV.AOL.COM by lists.aol.com (LSMTP for Windows NT v1.1a) with SMTP id [EMAIL PROTECTED]; Fri, 8 Jan 1999 0:22:38 -0500 Received: from LISTSERV.AOL.COM by LISTSERV.AOL.COM (LISTSERV-TCP/IP release 1.8d) with spool id 21117251 for [EMAIL PROTECTED]; Fri, 8 Jan 1999 00:22:38 -0500 Received: from hawk.prod.itd.earthlink.net (hawk.prod.itd.earthlink.net [207.217.120.22]) by listserv.aol.com (8.8.8/8.8.8) with ESMTP id AAA29868 for [EMAIL PROTECTED]; Fri, 8 Jan 1999 00:22:37 -0500 (EST) Received: from LOCALNAME (sdn-ar-002nyglenP284.dialsprint.net [168.191.118.86]) by hawk.prod.itd.earthlink.net (8.8.7/8.8.5) with SMTP id VAA05008 for [EMAIL PROTECTED]; Thu, 7 Jan 1999 21:22:35 -0800 (PST) MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-type: text/plain; charset=US-ASCII Content-transfer-encoding: 7BIT Priority: normal Message-ID: [EMAIL PROTECTED] Date: Thu, 7 Jan 1999 22:20:53 + Reply-To: Conspiracy Theory Research List [EMAIL PROTECTED] Sender: Conspiracy Theory Research List [EMAIL PROTECTED] From: Sno0wl [EMAIL PROTECTED] Subject: Re: [CTRL] Two Cows (humor) To: [EMAIL PROTECTED] In-Reply-To: [EMAIL PROTECTED] DECLARATION DISCLAIMER == CTRL is a discussion and informational exchange list. Proselyzting propagandic screeds are not allowed. Substancenot soapboxing! These are sordid matters and 'conspiracy theory', with its many half-truths, misdirections and outright frauds is used politically by different groups with major and minor effects spread throughout the spectrum of time and thought. That being said, CTRL gives no endorsement to the validity of posts, and always suggests to readers; be wary of what you read. CTRL gives no credeence to Holocaust denial and nazi's need not apply. Let us please be civil and as always, Caveat Lector. Archives Available at: http://home.ease.lsoft.com/archives/CTRL.html http:[EMAIL PROTECTED]/ To subscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SUBSCRIBE CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED] To UNsubscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SIGNOFF CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED] Om
Re: [CTRL] [Re: [CTRL] Two Cows (humor)]
-Caveat Lector- Sno0wl [EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote: -Caveat Lector- My vote is for surrealism.which is the system we seem to be living under. And may explain my general state of contentment, in spite of what many might consider flaws and lacks in my current lifestyle. My giraffe is having a ball. Well, you may be living in the state of Contentment, but I seem to be in the statement of Confusion, which is next to Indignation and around the corner from Anxiety... Bob = Robert F. Tatman [EMAIL PROTECTED] [EMAIL PROTECTED] Remove "nospam" from the address to reply. NOTICE: In accordance with Title 17 U.S.C. Section 107, this material is distributed without profit to those who have expressed a prior interest in receiving the included information for research and educational purposes. For more information go to: http://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/17/107.shtml POSTING THIS MESSAGE TO THE INTERNET DOES NOT IMPLY PERMISSION TO SEND UNSOLICITED COMMERCIAL E-MAIL (SPAM) TO THIS OR ANY OTHER INTERNET ADDRESS. RECEIPT OF SPAM WILL RESULT IN IMMEDIATE NOTIFICATION OF THE SENDER'S ISP. More than just email--Get your FREE Netscape WebMail account today at http://home.netscape.com/netcenter/mail DECLARATION DISCLAIMER == CTRL is a discussion and informational exchange list. Proselyzting propagandic screeds are not allowed. Substancenot soapboxing! These are sordid matters and 'conspiracy theory', with its many half-truths, misdirections and outright frauds is used politically by different groups with major and minor effects spread throughout the spectrum of time and thought. That being said, CTRL gives no endorsement to the validity of posts, and always suggests to readers; be wary of what you read. CTRL gives no credeence to Holocaust denial and nazi's need not apply. Let us please be civil and as always, Caveat Lector. Archives Available at: http://home.ease.lsoft.com/archives/CTRL.html http:[EMAIL PROTECTED]/ To subscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SUBSCRIBE CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED] To UNsubscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SIGNOFF CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED] Om
Re: [CTRL] Two Cows (humor)
-Caveat Lector- Gerald Harp wrote: -Caveat Lector- In a message dated 1/5/99 2:03:42 PM Eastern Standard Time, [EMAIL PROTECTED] writes: CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. This single line for capitalism which makes it sound like a right smart system while the alternatives are described with multiple sentences and none too flatteringly is not well balanced. I don't know what the right add-on should be but as it is, it doesn't account for the ruthless quality of capitalism which leaves 41 million Americans below the poverty line. It is also silent about the harsher tone of American capitalism that developed after the fall of the Soviet Union. For the sake of the Russian people and the American people, we need Gorbachev back. Jerry Jerry, I totally agree with your above statement except for the Gorbachev part. It was Gorby who started Russia on the path to capitalist destruction. He is the supreme traitor to his nation. That's why he doesn't live there any more. He lives in the Presidio in California. Joshua2 DECLARATION DISCLAIMER == CTRL is a discussion and informational exchange list. Proselyzting propagandic screeds are not allowed. Substancenot soapboxing! These are sordid matters and 'conspiracy theory', with its many half-truths, misdirections and outright frauds is used politically by different groups with major and minor effects spread throughout the spectrum of time and thought. That being said, CTRL gives no endorsement to the validity of posts, and always suggests to readers; be wary of what you read. CTRL gives no credeence to Holocaust denial and nazi's need not apply. Let us please be civil and as always, Caveat Lector. Archives Available at: http://home.ease.lsoft.com/archives/CTRL.html http:[EMAIL PROTECTED]/ To subscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SUBSCRIBE CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED] To UNsubscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SIGNOFF CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED] Om
Re: [CTRL] Two Cows (humor)
-Caveat Lector- At 08:16 PM 1/5/99 EST, Gerald Harp wrote: -Caveat Lector- In a message dated 1/5/99 2:03:42 PM Eastern Standard Time, [EMAIL PROTECTED] writes: CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. This single line for capitalism which makes it sound like a right smart system while the alternatives are described with multiple sentences and none too flatteringly is not well balanced. I don't know what the right add-on should be but as it is, Here's my take: CAPITALISM (PURE UNBRIDLED): You have two cows. You would like to sell one and buy a bull, but your neighbor owns all the bulls and isn't selling. Your neighbor keeps enlarging his herd, forcing the price of milk down until you're forced to sell your cows to your neighbor. Then the price of milk is raised and your only choice is to go to work for your neighbor for substinence wages. Eventually you find yourself living in a shack that your neighbor owns, shopping in a store your neighbor owns, and in debt up to your ears to your neighbor. If you think this is feudalism, remember that you're free to leave, as long as you pay your debts. CAPITALISM (AMERICAN STYLE): You have two cows. You fill out lots of paperwork and go in debt to buy the equipment you need to receive USDA certification. You can only sell milk at a price set by an arcane government formula based on your distance from Wisconsin. Some of the milk you sell is made into cheese and winds up in a government warehouse. To compete you buy antibiotics and bovine growth hormone from a large pharmaceutical corporation. To enlarge your herd you buy bull sperm from a large agribusiness. To feed your herd you buy cattle feed from another large corporation. Despite your best efforts you wind up heavily indebted to the local bank, and your kids move to the city to be something besides dairy farmers. CAPITALISM (REIGNED IN BY ADAM SMITH'S MYTHICAL IDEAL "INVISIBLE HAND OF GOVERNMENT"): You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Che When does the next millenium begin? Since a millennium is 1000 years, the first millennium began at the start of the year 1 and ended at the end of the year 1000. The second millennium then began with the year 1001 and will conclude at the end of the year 2000. Therefore, the next millennium begins with the year 2001. from: National Institute of Standards and Technology, Time and Frequency FAQ - http://www.bldrdoc.gov/timefreq/faq/faq.htm DECLARATION DISCLAIMER == CTRL is a discussion and informational exchange list. Proselyzting propagandic screeds are not allowed. Substancenot soapboxing! These are sordid matters and 'conspiracy theory', with its many half-truths, misdirections and outright frauds is used politically by different groups with major and minor effects spread throughout the spectrum of time and thought. That being said, CTRL gives no endorsement to the validity of posts, and always suggests to readers; be wary of what you read. CTRL gives no credeence to Holocaust denial and nazi's need not apply. Let us please be civil and as always, Caveat Lector. Archives Available at: http://home.ease.lsoft.com/archives/CTRL.html http:[EMAIL PROTECTED]/ To subscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SUBSCRIBE CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED] To UNsubscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SIGNOFF CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED] Om
[CTRL] Two Cows (humor)
-Caveat Lector- FEUDALISM: You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk. PURE SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows. You have to take care of all the cows. The government gives you as much milk as you need. BUREAUCRATIC SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows. They are cared for by exchicken farmers. You have to take care of the chickens the government took from the chicken farmers. The government gives you as much milk and as many eggs as the regulations say you should need. FASCISM: You have two cows. The government takes both, hires you to take care of them, and sells you the milk. PURE COMMUNISM: You have two cows. Your neighbors help you take care of them, and you all share the milk. RUSSIAN COMMUNISM: You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the government takes all the milk. DICTATORSHIP: You have two cows. The government takes both and shoots you. SINGAPOREAN DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. The government fines you for keeping two unlicensed farm animals in an apartment. MILITARIANISM: You have two cows. The government takes both and drafts you. PURE DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbors decide who gets the milk. REPRESENTATIVE DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbors pick someone to tell you who gets the milk. AMERICAN DEMOCRACY: The government promises to give you two cows if you vote for it. After the election, the president is impeached for speculating in cow futures. The press dubs the affair "Cowgate". BRITISH DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. You feed them sheeps' brains and they go mad. The government doesn't do anything. BUREAUCRACY: You have two cows. At first the government regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then it pays you not to milk them. After that it takes both, shoots one, milks the other and pours the milk down the drain. Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing cows.. ANARCHY: You have two cows. Either you sell the milk at a fair price or your neighbors try to kill you and take the cows. CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. HONG KONG CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother in law at the bank, then execute a debt / equity swap with associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax deduction for keeping five cows. The milk rights of six cows are transferred via a Panamanian intermediary to a Cayman Islands company secretly owned by the majority shareholder, who sells the rights to all seven cows' milk back to the listed company. The annual report says that the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. Meanwhile, you kill the two cows because the fung shiu is bad. ENVIRONMENTALISM: You have two cows. The government bans you from milking or killing them. FEMINISM: You have two cows. They get married and adopt a veal calf. TOTALITARIANISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and denies they ever existed. Milk is banned. COUNTER CULTURE: Wow, dude, there's like... these two cows, man. You got to have some of this milk. SURREALISM: You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons. LIBERTARIANISM: You have two cows. One has actually read the constitution, believes in it, and has some really good ideas about government. The cow runs for office, and while most people agree that the cow is the best candidate, nobody except the other cow votes for her because they think it would be "throwing their vote away." DECLARATION DISCLAIMER == CTRL is a discussion and informational exchange list. Proselyzting propagandic screeds are not allowed. Substancenot soapboxing! These are sordid matters and 'conspiracy theory', with its many half-truths, misdirections and outright frauds is used politically by different groups with major and minor effects spread throughout the spectrum of time and thought. That being said, CTRL gives no endorsement to the validity of posts, and always suggests to readers; be wary of what you read. CTRL gives no credeence to Holocaust denial and nazi's need not apply. Let us please be civil and as always, Caveat Lector. Archives Available at: http://home.ease.lsoft.com/archives/CTRL.html http:[EMAIL PROTECTED]/ To subscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SUBSCRIBE CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED] To UNsubscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SIGNOFF CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED] Om
Re: [CTRL] Two Cows (humor)
-Caveat Lector- In a message dated 1/5/99 2:03:42 PM Eastern Standard Time, [EMAIL PROTECTED] writes: CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. This single line for capitalism which makes it sound like a right smart system while the alternatives are described with multiple sentences and none too flatteringly is not well balanced. I don't know what the right add-on should be but as it is, it doesn't account for the ruthless quality of capitalism which leaves 41 million Americans below the poverty line. It is also silent about the harsher tone of American capitalism that developed after the fall of the Soviet Union. For the sake of the Russian people and the American people, we need Gorbachev back. Jerry DECLARATION DISCLAIMER == CTRL is a discussion and informational exchange list. Proselyzting propagandic screeds are not allowed. Substancenot soapboxing! These are sordid matters and 'conspiracy theory', with its many half-truths, misdirections and outright frauds is used politically by different groups with major and minor effects spread throughout the spectrum of time and thought. That being said, CTRL gives no endorsement to the validity of posts, and always suggests to readers; be wary of what you read. CTRL gives no credeence to Holocaust denial and nazi's need not apply. Let us please be civil and as always, Caveat Lector. Archives Available at: http://home.ease.lsoft.com/archives/CTRL.html http:[EMAIL PROTECTED]/ To subscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SUBSCRIBE CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED] To UNsubscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SIGNOFF CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED] Om
Re: [CTRL] Two Cows (humor)
-Caveat Lector- On Tue, 5 Jan 1999 20:16:25 EST, you, Gerald Harp [EMAIL PROTECTED], wrote: -Caveat Lector- In a message dated 1/5/99 2:03:42 PM Eastern Standard Time, [EMAIL PROTECTED] writes: CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. This single line for capitalism which makes it sound like a right smart system while the alternatives are described with multiple sentences and none too flatteringly is not well balanced. I don't know what the right add-on should be but as it is, How about just changing the first one to CAPITALISM: You have two female slaves. You sell one and buy a male slave. -JoAnne, tying two threads together neatly. DECLARATION DISCLAIMER == CTRL is a discussion and informational exchange list. Proselyzting propagandic screeds are not allowed. Substancenot soapboxing! These are sordid matters and 'conspiracy theory', with its many half-truths, misdirections and outright frauds is used politically by different groups with major and minor effects spread throughout the spectrum of time and thought. That being said, CTRL gives no endorsement to the validity of posts, and always suggests to readers; be wary of what you read. CTRL gives no credeence to Holocaust denial and nazi's need not apply. Let us please be civil and as always, Caveat Lector. Archives Available at: http://home.ease.lsoft.com/archives/CTRL.html http:[EMAIL PROTECTED]/ To subscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SUBSCRIBE CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED] To UNsubscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SIGNOFF CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED] Om
Re: [CTRL] Two Cows (humor)
-Caveat Lector- Gerald Harp wrote: -Caveat Lector- [EMAIL PROTECTED] writes: CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. This single line for capitalism which makes it sound like a right smart system while the alternatives are described with multiple sentences and none too flatteringly is not well balanced. Is there a "balance" between Truth and Error? What would it be, "Sorta right?" I don't know what the right add-on should be but as it is, it doesn't account for the ruthless quality of capitalism which leaves 41 million Americans below the poverty line. Capitalism doesn't "leave" anyone below the poverty line. You pays your money and you makes your choice. I've been below the poverty line, and capitalism is what made it possible for me to rise above it... It sure as hell wasn't welfare! It is also silent about the harsher tone of American capitalism that developed after the fall of the Soviet Union. For the sake of the Russian people and the American people, we need Gorbachev back. You're serious? For your information, Gorbechev IS back... He is lounging in palatial splendor in the Presidio -- courtesy of the U.S. taxpayer -- just outside of San Francisco... While your pathetic masses are wallowing in poverty. Great guy, Gorbechev.. ex-honcho of the Gulag. Give me a break! Hawk DECLARATION DISCLAIMER == CTRL is a discussion and informational exchange list. Proselyzting propagandic screeds are not allowed. Substancenot soapboxing! These are sordid matters and 'conspiracy theory', with its many half-truths, misdirections and outright frauds is used politically by different groups with major and minor effects spread throughout the spectrum of time and thought. That being said, CTRL gives no endorsement to the validity of posts, and always suggests to readers; be wary of what you read. CTRL gives no credeence to Holocaust denial and nazi's need not apply. Let us please be civil and as always, Caveat Lector. Archives Available at: http://home.ease.lsoft.com/archives/CTRL.html http:[EMAIL PROTECTED]/ To subscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SUBSCRIBE CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED] To UNsubscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SIGNOFF CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED] Om
