Show and Tell
A kindergarten teacher gave her class a show and
tell assignment. Each student was instructed to bring in an object to share
with the class that represented their religion. The first student got up in
front of the class and
Teenager Daughter Owner's Manual
Instructions for all those with teenage daughters or
daughters
who think they are teenagers or who will eventually be teen-
agers.
Teenager Owner's Manual Congratulations! You are now the
proud
new owner of a teenage daughter.
Please read this manual
Did you hear about the farmer who ploughed his field
with a steamroller?
He wanted to grow mash potatoes.
What did the neurotic pig say to the farmer?
You take me for grunted.
When is a farmer like a magician?
When he turns his cow too pasture.
Why
Say the word slowly and Take your time.
1. ARBITRATOR: A cook that leaves Arby's to work at
McDonalds.
2. AVOIDABLE: What a bullfighter tried to do.
3. BERNADETTE: The act of torching a mortgage.
4. BURGLARIZE: What a crook sees with..
5. CONTROL: A short, ugly inmate.
6. COUNTERFEITERS:
LACKING ALL RELIGION
A very zealous soul-winning young preacher recently came
upon a farmer working in his field. Being concerned about
the farmer's soul the preacher asked the man, Are you
laboring in the vineyard of the Lord my good man?
Not even looking at the preacher and continuing his
Locked Out
One afternoon my wife April rushed out of the house,
forgetting her
keys, and found herself locked out. There was nothing she
could do but
wait for me to come home. She
saw a neighbor who was outside raking leaves.
You locked yourself out? he asked.
Yeah, this is the second
