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************************************ Dang, That's Pretty Doggone Bad "More than 50 percent of Georgians wouldn't vote for Roy Barnes if he gave them a free puppy." - Dan McLagan, spokesman for Republican Georgia gubernatorial candidate Sonny Perdue who is running against Democrat incumbent Gov. Roy Barnes ************************************ Telephone, Television & Tell-a-Friend If you know someone who might like to join the growing army of conservatives (and a few Palm Beach Democrats) who receive our FREE Chuck Muth's News & Views briefings, just go to http://www.chuckmuth.com. ************************************ Back In the Saddle Again OK, the computer doctor was able to put the ol' Humpty Dumpty laptop back together again in time for me to hop on a plane to Las Vegas to load up our furniture and Dog #3 and complete the move back east. Finally, after more than two months living with the wife, two kids and two dogs in our motor home, "GOP 1," in an RV park on the Bush River (where else?) in Maryland, we get to move into a real house again. Hoo-hah! Anyway, I'll be on the road driving cross-country again for the third (and hopefully last) time in just over two months, so bear with me if this is the last News & Views you get for a few days. ************************************ The Absurdity of the Gun Control Argument "The notion that disarming ordinary citizens who pose no threat to anyone will somehow deter a psychotic who is gunning down total strangers, apparently for no reason at all, is as ridiculous as the idea that 'controlling' hunting knives would have saved Nikole Brown Simpson and Ron Goldman - or that a ban on box-cutters would have stopped the September 11 hijackers. "The person responsible for the recent spate of killings (in Maryland) probably did not buy his weapon over-the-counter. It's doubtful he patiently filled out the reams of paperwork required of law-abiding gun purchasers. No background check would have impeded his dastardly agenda. Such a person will always obtain the tools of his trade, regardless of what the law says. That's why they are called 'criminals,' after all." - Washington Times editorial, 10/9/02 ************************************ Stop! Or I'll Yell "Stop" Again. About a week ago, a sniper started picking off innocent citizens in the Maryland suburbs surrounding Washington, DC. On Tuesday, Maryland's Democrat Gov. Parris Glendenning emerged from his bunker seclusion for the first time since the shootings began to call the sniper a "coward." Uh-huh. In a press conference statement, the courageous governor told the sniper to "turn himself in, to stop this insane killing." Uh-huh. Son-of-a-gun, why didn't President Bush think of that after September 11? Instead of immediately hunting down Osama bin Laden & Company like the dogs they are, why didn't the president first tell Uncle binny "to turn himself in, to stop this insane killing"? Uh-huh. Glendenning's pathetic response to the sniper killings is just so typical of the liberal wing of the Democrat Party, the same wing of fruits and nuts now sucking up to Saddam Hussein. Hey, Saddy, why don't you just turn yourself in and stop being a big meanie, huh? Sheesh. This is why the nation is damned lucky to have President Bush and the Republicans running the show out of the White House under the circumstances. And if Maryland voters are smart, they'll elect a new, REPUBLICAN governor named Bobby Ehrlich on November 5th to replace ol' "Blood & Guts" Glendenning. ********************************* Long Savings on Long Distance! Just 4.97 cents per minute (5.97 cents for some non-regional bell companies) * All state-to-state calls in the continental U.S. * Residential or commercial * 6-second billing increments after the first 18 seconds * 24 hours/day * 7 days/week * No access codes * No minimums * No activation fees * No monthly service charge unless your bill is less than $20.00 a month (then a $2.50 service charge will apply) * No need to change your local phone company * No hassles * Easy sign-up. *a small portion of each bill goes to help continue publishing our FREE Chuck Muth's News & Views e-newsletter. go to://www.GOPLongDistance.com today. ************************************ Hello, Operator? Former Clinton strategist and Hill columnist Dick Morris shares his suggestion for a GOP ad highlighting the Democrats' position of defending big labor and bureaucratic interests over national security in their opposition to the President's proposal for a new Department of Homeland Security. Operator (in a tired, nasal voice): "Homeland Security, may we help you?" Woman phoning in a tip: "The people in the house next door are hiding bombs in their basement. I think they are planning to do something. They come from some Mideastern country." Operator: "Hold the line, please. I will switch you to Bombs and Demolition." Woman: "Hello, some young Arab men just moved into the house next door and I have seen them carrying weapons in and out at all hours of the night. I'm worried they may try to hijack a plane." Operator: "Hold the line. I'll transfer you to Hijacking." Announcer: "Sound crazy? But that's what the Democrats want to do to Bush' s Homeland Security Agency. They want union rules and civil service rules to stop the president from shuffling the employees to where they are needed." Operator: "Suspicious Aliens, may we help you?" Announcer: "President Bush says give him the flexibility to transfer manpower to where it is needed to meet threats as they arise. The Democrats want the same old bureaucratic rules to run the show." Operator: "Nuclear Power Plant Protection, hold the line a moment." Announcer: "No more bureaucrats. No more business as usual. Just Homeland Security. For our homeland." Yeah, right, sure. Like the Republicans could ever screw up enough testosterone to run a truthful but hard-hitting commercial like that. The weenies. ************************************ A Whole New Ballgame "The president has said this new warfare will require new strategies and his strategy of pre-emption in limited and specific instances is necessary against Saddam Hussein. Waiting for Saddam is like waiting for a killer to knock at the door. When he knocks (or breaks down the door), it is more difficult to stop him than if he had been stopped several miles away. "The kind of death Saddam Hussein can deliver will take thousands of lives if we wait for him to start killing Americans. Never has the strategy of getting our enemy before he gets us looked more defensible, or more urgent." - Columnist Cal Thomas ************************************ We're Everywhere You Want Us To Be "Navy personnel bought jewelry, attended ball games and even hired prostitutes at Nevada brothels with government funds, congressional investigators have found in the latest examples of abuses in the Pentagon credit-card program." - Associated Press, 10/9/02 ************************************ Kicking a Man on His Way Out "This was a complete slap at Strom Thurmond in the last days of his tenure. I wouldn't do that to a bad dog." - Utah Sen. Orrin Hatch (R) on Democrats who this week broke Senate rules and protocol by going back on their word to retiring, 99-year-old South Carolina Sen. Strom Thurmond (R) and refusing his final request to approve the nomination of his former chief of staff, Judge Dennis Shedd, to the 4th Circuit Court ************************************ One Nation, Under Whoever. Also on Tuesday, the House voted 401 to 5 to keep the words "under God" in the Pledge of Allegiance and reaffirmed the national motto, "In God We Trust." You'll be shocked - SHOCKED! - to learn that all five votes against "God" were Democrats. You'll also be surprised that one of those Democrats was Rep. Jim McDermott of Washington - the same schmuck who went to Baghdad and called President Bush a liar a little over a week ago. At least he's consistent. ************************************ Illegal Alien Nation Rep. Tom Tancredo (R-Colorado) has been a rock in his efforts to shore up our nation's immigration policies despite a withering onslaught from the forces of evil on the left. One of Tancredo's proposals is to station troops on the U.S.-Mexican border to stop the flow of both illegal drugs and illegal aliens (the key word here being "illegal") into our country. So far, he has delivered over 30,000 citizen petitions to the White House backing his proposal. If you haven't signed on as yet, you can still do so by going to www.tancredo.org. ********************************* Reading Is Fundamental * Michelle Malkin's book "Invasion" shows how and why every component of America's immigration system has failed. To order now, click here: <http://www.conservativebookservice.com/bookpage.asp?prod_cd=c6063&sour_cd=C ME005601> ************************************ Just Say No to Saying No Gadzooks! Miss America actually has something important and intelligent to say - but the Miss America folks are demanding she not say it. See, Erika Harold isn't just some dumb California blonde in high heels and a bikini (not that there's anything wrong with that!) saying, "Like, you know, I, like, really, really, REALLY want world peace and to end hunger and disease and like, well, for sure." No, no, no. This radical gal has the GALL to suggest sexual abstinence for teenage girls! Good, Gawd, this woman must be STOPPED! By golly, do you know what would happen to the unwanted pregnancy rate in this country if teens actually refrained from doing the thingy that results in pregnancy? And what would happen to the condom industry? And how about those poor abortion doctors who would have fewer clients? How in the world will they ever be able to make the Beemer payment each month? Think of the consequences of your actions, woman! Pageant officials are doing everything they can to get Miss Harold to put a sock in it, pressuring her to instead talk about "youth-violence prevention." To her credit, Harold is remaining defiant, telling reporters at the National Press Club this week that she "will not be bullied." Good for you, Erika. Being chosen Miss America shouldn't mean you give up your American right to freedom of speech. And if you ever need a date. What's that, honey? Oops. Never mind. ************************************ Speaking of Supermodels "I know it's not a popular issue. And I was always pro-choice. I'm a person who always has and always will fight for the rights of women. And even though I became a Christian at age 18, I remained pro-choice because I believed it was a woman's choice. But the moment I learned that the unborn was a human being, not part of a woman's body...but its own individual human being, I have no choice but to defend the most vulnerable among us." - Supermodel Kathy Ireland, Fox News' "Hannity & Colmes, 10/1/02 ************************************ Hitting the Lawsuit Lottery Jackpot "A California jury last Friday awarded a 64-year-old woman the astounding amount of $28 billion for failing to take responsibility for her own actions that probably shortened her life. . . . Whose fault was it that she developed lung cancer after decades of smoking, in the face of irrefutable evidence of what that eventually might cost her? Was it the tobacco companies that sold her the legal product, even warning her on every package of cigarettes she bought about the potential result? "The jury said it was, and in so doing absolved her of any part in this tragedy. How extraordinary. In this suit she had the temerity to bring against Phillip Morris, testimony revealed she had been repeatedly cautioned by her doctor and pleaded with by her family to stop a habit even the most slow-witted of us understands can be an early death sentence. Her response, according to reports, was defiance and utter obstinacy. She insisted she was the master of her own fate. That is, until she became ill. Then she seemed to be arguing that her fate actually had been in someone else's hands." - Columnist Dan Thomasson ************************************ How Did We Ever Survive? Looking back, it's hard to believe that we have lived as long as we have. As children we would ride in cars with no seat belts or air bags. Riding in the back of a pickup truck on a warm day was always a special treat. Our baby cribs were painted with bright colored lead based paint. We often chewed on the crib, ingesting the paint. We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors, or cabinets, and when we rode our bikes we had no helmets - even with our eyes closed on an asphalt hill. We drank water from the garden hose and not from a bottle. We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then rode down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times we learned to solve the problem. We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on. No one was able to reach us all day. We played dodge ball and sometimes the ball would really hurt. We ate cupcakes, bread and butter, and drank sugar soda, but we were never overweight; we were always outside playing. Little League had tryouts, and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't had to learn to deal with disappointment. Some students weren't as smart as others or didn't work hard so they failed a grade and were held back to repeat the same grade. That generation produced some of the greatest risk-takers and problem solvers. We had the freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned how to deal with it all. - Author Unknown ********************************** In Your Heart You Know He's Right "I have little interest in streamlining government or in making it more efficient, for I mean to reduce its size. I do not undertake to promote welfare, for I propose to extend freedom. My aim is not to pass laws, but to repeal them. It is not to inaugurate new programs, but to cancel old ones that do violence to the Constitution, or that have failed in their purpose, or that impose on the people an unwarranted financial burden. I will not attempt to discover whether legislation is 'needed' before I have first determined whether it is constitutionally permissible. And if I should later be attacked for neglecting my constituents' interests, I shall reply that I was informed their main interest is liberty and that in that cause I am doing the very best I can." - Sen. Barry Goldwater (R-Ariz.), "The Conscience of a Conservative" Join the "next generation of Goldwater Conservatives" by joining the Goldwater Club. Annual dues for as little as $25. Just go to: http://www.chuckmuth.com/goldwater.htm ********************************* ********************************* Published by The Goldwater Club Chuck Muth, Editor/Publisher P.O. Box 19893 Alexandria, VA 22320 Phone: (702) 391-0222 E-mail: [EMAIL PROTECTED] The opinions and views expressed in Chuck Muth's News & Views reflect those of the writers, editors and columnists therein and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the sponsors, advertisers ... heck, even some of our readers. To be REMOVED, go to: http://www.chuckmuth.com/newsletter/ and complete the removal request instructions you'll find there. Or send your request to [EMAIL PROTECTED] # # #
