I believe that your instructor was trying to convey that women must be active
in the dance, not passive. She must not be a piece of furniture on wheels that
the men push around.
The difficulties in leading and following come at different times in the
learning cycle. For men, it comes earlier. It was nice that the woman
acknowledge that leading is difficult because it is. There's a lot to know.
For women, the difficulty comes later. It is possible that the woman you
argued with hasn't reached that stage yet. It sounds to me as if she might not
have found her own dance, yet. How many women find and own their dance? In my
experience, not many. Women may become technically good, but that ownership is
often missing. Is it "wrong" for her to have not reached that staged? Not
really, especially if all she is wanting is to get dances at a milonga with the
average dancer. If, however, she wants to get dances with really good
dancers, that's a different story.
I don't know your dance, so I certainly can't comment on what you should or
shouldn't be thinking. Three years, though, is not a long time, and there's
plenty of time for you to find your dance. Just enjoy your learning experience.
Trini de Pittsburgh
--- On Mon, 7/12/10, WILL MORROW <will...@msn.com> wrote:
Do followers who buy into this stereotypical concept not recognize it as an
artificial performance standard based on (most of the time, their own)
sub-standard expectation? Just as importantly, do instructors who buy into and
teach it not recognize this idea of a subservient, inferior perspective for
what it is?
Just a thought. I'd be interested to read how the subscribers here see the role
of the follower.
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