Dear Danny,
thank you very much for reading the draft carefully and for your
comments! We will go through them and address them.
- Jan (and co-authors)
On 17.02.20 18:19, Danny Alex Lachos Perez wrote:
Dear authors,
I have performed a review of this draft (-09).
My comments are below:
1) Section 2.2
"Application-Layer Traffic Optimization (ALTO) [RFC7285
<https://tools.ietf.org/html/rfc7285>] is an
approach for guiding the resource provider selection process in
distributed applications that can choose among several candidate
resources providers to retrieve a given resource. By conveying
network layer (topology) information, an ALTO server can provide
important information to "guide" the resource provider selection
process in distributed applications."
The two paragraphs are very similar in content, consider merging.
E.g.:
"Application-Layer Traffic Optimization (ALTO) [RFC7285] is an
approach for conveying network layer (topology) information to
"guide" the resource provider selection process in distributed
applications."
2) Section 2.2
"Recently, however, ALTO is
also being considered for improving the request routing in CDNs
[I-D.jenkins-alto-cdn-use-cases
<https://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-09#ref-I-D.jenkins-alto-cdn-use-cases>]."
The reference dates from 2012 and it is an expired draft
3) Section 2.2
"This would enable a uCDN to
determine if a given dCDN actually has the capabilities for a
given request with respect to the type of content requested."
Wordy sentence, consider rewriting: e.g., "This would enable a
uCDN to determine if a dCDN actually has the capabilities for a
given type of content request."
4) Section 2.1
" related to CDNI Metadata.
o"
Remove last bullet (there is no text)
5) Introduction
"instead of getting the full resource which can be huge.Section 6
<https://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-09#section-6>"
Consider adding a comma: "instead of getting the full resource*,*
which can be huge. Section 6"
6) Introduction
"Section 7
<https://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-09#section-7>
andSection 8
<https://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-09#section-8>
respectively."
Consider adding a comma: "Section 7 and Section 8, respectively."
7) Section 2.2
" in particular for an FCI protocol:
o"
Remove bullet (there is no text)
8) Section 4.2.4
"In this example, the ALTO client is interested in changes of "my-
cdnifci-with-pid-footprints". Considering two changes, the first one"
Consider rewriting: "In this example, the ALTO client is
interested in two changes of "my- cdnifci-with-pid-footprints".
The first one"
9) Section 2.2
"design of ALTO supports server pushed incremental updates
[I-D.ietf-alto-incr-update-sse
<https://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-09#ref-I-D.ietf-alto-incr-update-sse>].."
Consider updating the reference
sse-17 -> sse-19
10) Section 2.2
" ALTO Path
Vector Extension [I-D.ietf-alto-path-vector
<https://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-09#ref-I-D.ietf-alto-path-vector>]
is designed to allow"
Consider updating the reference
vector-08 -> vector-09
11) Section 2.2
"footprint by a dCDN, in particular
if such a footprint is being"
Consider adding a comma: "... in particular*,* if such ..."
12) Section 2.2
"would enable a dCDN to directly inform a uCDN about such changes."
Consider rewriting: "to directly inform a uCDN about such changes"
-> "to inform a uCDN about such changes directly"
13) Section 3.6
"value and footprints, where footprints are defined in"
Consider adding a comma: "... value, and footprints ..."
14) Section 5.6
"an full CDNI FCI resource (SeeSection 3.6
<https://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-09#section-3.6>.)"
"an full" -> a full
15) Section 6
"CDNI capabilities, the most natrual way to satisfy this requirement"
"natrual" -> "natural"
16) Section 6
" is to use the ALTO property map defined in
[I-D.ietf-alto-unified-props-new
<https://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-09#ref-I-D.ietf-alto-unified-props-new>]."
Consider updating the reference
new-09 -> new-10
17) Section 6.1.1.2
"The entity identifiers of entities in an asn domain is encoded as a"
Consider changing the verb form: "The entity identifiers of
entities in an asn domain *are* encoded..."
18) Section 6.1.2.2
"The entity identifiers of entities in a countrycode domain is encoded"
Consider changing the verb form: "The entity identifiers of
entities in a countrycode domain *are* encoded..."
19) Section 7.1
"A new footprint type is to be registred"
Typo: "registred" -> registered
20) Section 7.3
"property type is to be registred, listed in Table 3."
Typo: "registred" -> registered
21) Section 8
"Security Considerations (Section 15
<https://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-09#section-15>) of
the base protocol fully apply"
Consider fixing the link "Section 15"
22) Section 8
"expoing all full/filtered CDNI FCI resources in one of its IRDs."
"expoing" -> "exposing"
Bestregards,
Danny Lachos
On Mon, Feb 3, 2020 at 1:06 PM Vijay Gurbani <[email protected]
<mailto:[email protected]>> wrote:
All: Jan and I will like to start WGLC for
draft-ietf-cdni-request-routing-alto-09. The WGLC period will run
from Mon,
Feb 3 2020 to Wed, Feb 19 2020.
This email is also being cross-posted to the CDNI working group.
We will like to have one WG list member from ALTO and one WG list
member from
CDNI review this draft in depth. Please send Jan and me an email
if you are willing
review the draft as part of WGLC.
In addition, we will like general reviews of the draft from both
ALTO and CDNI WGs.
Thank you.
_______________________________________________
alto mailing list
[email protected] <mailto:[email protected]>
https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/alto
_______________________________________________
CDNi mailing list
[email protected]
https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/cdni
_______________________________________________
alto mailing list
[email protected]
https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/alto
