Hi authors,

 

Thanks for starting this work on a YANG model for ALTO servers. I believe this 
will be a useful component to support the operational features of ALTO in real 
deployments.

 

I have done a "sanity review" rather than a detailed technical review. 

 

In summary, this looks like a reasonable starting point to address some of the 
work in the WG for handling OAM from an operational point of view.

 

Hope this helps.

 

Best,

Adrian

 

==observations==

 

Obviously (!) there is no YANG in this model yet. I think that is OK for

a work in progress, but I'm not sure about adopting it until at least a 

first attempt has been made.

 

---

 

The Title says the document is about OAM for ALTO protocol, but the

Abstract says "operations and management". I prefer the Abstract's 

choice of words.

 

---

 

Extensibility

 

The document is good to mention that it is a requirement that the model

be extensible for ALTO protocol extensions. And it is right that it

focus on the base protocol and the core extensions already published as

RFCs.

 

What is needed, however, is a discussion of how that objective has been

met and how it is expected that extensions will be handled. 

 

I suggest doing this by a new section "Extending this Data Model". You

won't need to write much.

 

---

 

I really like Table 2 and the indication of what requirements are being

addressed.

 

Three points:

 

1. I did not check back to RFC 7285 to see that all of the requirements

   are listed. I do note that there is a gap (16.2.3) and assume that 

   that is deliberate.

 

2. The text before the table mentions RFC 7971 but that doesn't appear

   in the table

 

3. There is not traceability of the solution to these requirements

   (e.g., resolved by the cost-metric data object). Section 4.2 maps the

   requirements into more specific requirements, but still lacks the

   traceability of what elements of the model satisfy the requirements.

 

---

 

4.2 

 

I'm not sure of the meaning of "should" in the bullet points in this

section. Since the model has now been written (well, will have been

written in this document), it is probably safe to say "the model does

these things".

 

The section concludes with a note about what may be considered in a 

future version of this document. That is fine *if* it is the intention

to do that work. Of course, the anxious reader would like that new

version to be now!

 

(Note that 5.1 has a similar note. It is probably not necessary to 

have the note present twice.)

 

---

 

5.1

 

  The ALTO YANG module defined in this document has all the common

   building blocks for ALTO OAM.

 

I think this probably has no meaning! "All the common building blocks"?

 

But also, this is another use of OAM rather than "operations and 

management"

 

---

 

I'm not sure of the benefit of including the full tree at the start of

5.1 and then showing each of the subtrees in the following sections. I

have no objection, but I note that the duplication introduces the chance

of a conflict.

 

---

 

5.4 has two paragraphs about additional data sources and retrieval

mechanisms.

 

   The data-source/source-params node can be augmented for different

   types of data sources.  This data model only includes import

   interfaces for a list of predefined data sources.  More data sources

   can be supported by future documents and other third-party providers.

 

Just need to say how. Presumably by augmenting something.

 

   Note: Current source configuration still has limitations.  It should

   be revised to support more general southbound and data retrieval

   mechanisms.

 

Is that revision intended for this document, or (like the previous

paragraph) for future documents? If intended for this document, you have

Appendix A for listing the work still to be done and so this sort of

note could be moved out to there.

 

---

 

5.4.1 has "current ALTO OAM data model" meaning that there is a general

issue about naming this work. I still prefer that is the "ALTO

operations and management data model"

 

---

 

5.4.2

 

It may be obvious to all ALTO people (or maybe all YANG people) what a

"prometheus data source" is. But I have no clue. At least a reference is

needed.

 

---

 

5.6

 

Not sure, but I think that maybe the counter32 objects in this section

should all be of type gauge.

 

---

 

When section 6 is written, I think that some of the server performance 

data in the model will be highly sensitive. It is commercially

sensitive how hard a server is having to work and how close it is to

exploding. It is valuable information for an attacker to know that a 

small push will cause a server to be over-committed, or to know which 

servers are doing most work. It may be possible to deduce things about 

the users in the network from how busy a server is.

 

==nits==

 

idnits shows the following warnings that need to be fixed:

 

** The document seems to lack an IANA Considerations section.  (See 

   Section 2.2 of https://www.ietf.org/id-info/checklist for how to

   handle the case when there are no actions for IANA.)

 

>>> In fact you'll need one of these to get the right codepoints 

    assigned for the new YANG module.

 

  == Unused Reference: 'RFC7286' is defined on line 679, but no explicit

     reference was found in the text

 

  == Unused Reference: 'RFC8571' is defined on line 703, but no explicit

     reference was found in the text

 

  == Unused Reference: 'RFC8686' is defined on line 709, but no explicit

     reference was found in the text

 

---

 

Need to capitalise "YANG" throughout.

 

---

 

5.1

 

OLD

        |--rw meta* [meta-key]

NEW

        +--rw meta* [meta-key]

END

 

---

 

5.3

 

   It can also include an accepted-group node containing a list of user-

   groups that can access this ALTO information resource.

 

Given the use of "MUST" in the previous and subsequent paragraph, this

is probably s/can/MAY/

 

But then you have 

   For each type of ALTO information resource, the creation intent MAY

   also need type-specific parameters.

 

I don't think "MAY need" is helpful. If it is needed it MUST be present.

So, probably,

   For each type of ALTO information resource, the creation intent may

   also need type-specific parameters, and if needed they MUST be

   present.

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