**
Oklahoma University :)  This is only one OU (in our minds) LOL

Kelly Deaver
L-3 Stratis / FAA Contractor
kdea...@kellydeaver.com (ARSlist mail)
kelly.ctr.dea...@faa.gov (Business mail)
 
 
-------- Original Message --------
Subject: Re: Friday Humor - Understanding Engineers
From: "Warren R. Baltimore II" <warrenbaltim...@gmail.com>
Date: Mon, April 25, 2011 11:03 am
To: arslist@ARSLIST.ORG

** Kelly....which OU?????

On Mon, Apr 25, 2011 at 9:14 AM, Kelly Deaver <kdea...@kellydeaver.com> wrote:
**
When I went to work in the OU Engineering college back in 1992 they 'issued' me a set of Engineer and Lawyer jokes. (Did you know they are natural enemies?) These were in the Engineer set :)  Good memory to read them again.

Kelly Deaver
L-3 Stratis / FAA Contractor
kdea...@kellydeaver.com (ARSlist mail)
kelly.ctr.dea...@faa.gov (Business mail)
 
 
-------- Original Message --------
Subject: Friday Humor - Understanding Engineers
From: Robert Dalton <barc...@cox.net>
Date: Fri, April 22, 2011 6:39 pm
To: arslist@ARSLIST.ORG

Is It possible to understand Engineers? Where there's a will, there's a way....

Understanding Engineers #1
Two engineering students were biking across a university campus when one said, "Where did you get such a great bike?" The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday, minding my own business, when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike, threw it to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take what you want."

The first engineer nodded approvingly and said, "Good choice, The clothes probably wouldn't have fit you anyway."


Understanding Engineers #2
To the optimist, the glass is half-full. To the pessimist, the glass is half-empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.


Understanding Engineers #3
A priest, an ophthalmologist, and an engineer were golfing one morning behind a particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumed, "What's with those guys? We must have been waiting for fifteen minutes!" The doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen such inept golf!" The priest said, "Here comes the greens keeper. Let's have a word with him."

He said, "Hello, George. What's wrong with that group ahead of us?
They're rather slow, aren't they?" The greens keeper replied, "Oh, yes. That's a group of blind firemen.
They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we let them play for free anytime."

The group fell silent for a moment. Then the priest said, "That's so sad. I think I'll say a special prayer for them." The ophthalmologist added, "Good idea. And maybe I could examine them to see if there's anything I can do for them." They were silent for a moment. Then the engineer said, "Why can't they play at night?"


Understanding Engineers #4
What is the difference between mechanical engineers and civil engineers?
Mechanical engineers build weapons.
Civil engineers build targets.


Understanding Engineers #5
The graduate with a science degree asks, "Why does it work?"
The graduate with an engineering degree asks, "How does it work?"
The graduate with accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?"
The graduate with an arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"


Understanding Engineers #6
Normal people believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it.
Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet.


Understanding Engineers #7
An engineer was crossing a road one day, when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess." He bent over, picked up the frog, and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn back into a beautiful princess and stay with you for one week." The engineer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket.

The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you for one week and do anything you want." Again, the engineer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket.

Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess and that I'll stay with you for one week and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?"

The engineer said, "Look, I'm a busy engineer.
I don't have time for a girlfriend. But a talking frog, now that's cool!"

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