Hilarious!!
Keep them coming 24x365
mm
Date: Sat, 22 Sep 2007 18:16:30 -0700From: [EMAIL PROTECTED]: [EMAIL
PROTECTED]: [EMAIL PROTECTED]; [EMAIL PROTECTED]: [Assam] Language again?
English language is confounding to people all over the world. You will get a
kick out of some of the signs in the following excerpt. The funnier ones are
later. English written in some of the national Indian newspapers indicates that
India will soon join the ranks, though India claims to be proficient in English.
I do not claim to be a master of English language but I resent the fact that
despite a slow degradation of English in India, the business protagonists keep
claiming that India is an English speaking country.
Dilip Deka
=====================================================
Signs Written in English Discovered Around the World On a French passenger jet:
Live West Under Your Seat. In a Tokyo hotel: Is forbidden to steal hotel towels
please. If you are not a person to do such thing is please not to read notis.
In a Bucharest hotel lobby: The lift is being fixed for the next day. During
that time we regret that you will be unbearable. In a Leipzig elevator: Do not
enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up. In a Belgrade hotel elevator:
Please leave your values at the front desk. In a hotel in Athens: Visitors are
expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 a.m. daily. In
a Yugoslav hotel: The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the
chambermaid. In a Japanese hotel: You are invited to take advantage of the
chambermaid. In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Monastery:
You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and Soviet
composers, artists, and writers are buried daily except Thursday.In an Austrian
hotel catering to skiers: Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of
repose in the boots of ascension. In a Swiss mountain inn: Special today: no
ice cream. On the menu of a Swiss restaurant: Our wines leave you nothing to
hope for. On the menu of a Polish hotel: Salad a firm's own make; limpid red
beet soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger; roasted duck let
loose; beef rashers beaten upin the country people's fashion. Alongside a Hong
Kong tailor shop: Ladies may have a fit upstairs. Two signs from a Mallorcan
shop entrance: English well talking. Here speeching American. At a Bangkok dry
cleaners: Drop your trousers here for best results. Outside a Paris dress shop:
Dresses for street walking. Advertisement for donkey rides in Thailand: Would
you like to ride on your own ass? At a Rhodes tailor shop: Order your summer
suit. Because is big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation.
Similarly, from the Soviet Weekly: There will be a Moscow exhibition of arts by
15,000 Soviet Republic painters and sculptors. These were executed over the
past two years. A sign posted in Germany's Black Forest: It is strictly
forbidden on our Black Forest camping site that people of different sex, for
instance, men and women, live together inone tent unless they are married with
each other for that purpose. In a Zurich hotel: Because of the impropriety of
entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that
the lobby be used for this purpose. In an advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist:
Teeth extracted by the latest Methodists. In a Rome laundry: Ladies, leave your
clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time. In a Norwegian
cocktail lounge: Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar. At a
Budapest zoo: Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable foods,
give it to the guard on duty. At the office of a Rome doctor: Specialist in
women and other diseases. At an Acapulco hotel: The manager has personally
passed all the water served here. At a Tokyo shop: Our nylons cost more than
common, but you'll find they are best in the long run. A Japanese information
booklet about using a hotel air conditioner: Cooles and Heates: If you want
just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself. From a brochure
of a car rental firm in Tokyo: When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle
the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your
passage, thentootle him with vigor. In a Bangkok temple: It is forbidden to
enter a woman even a foreigner if dressed as a man. In a Tokyo bar: Special
cocktails for the ladies with nuts. In a Copenhagen airline ticket office: We
take your bags and send them in all directions. On the door of a Moscow hotel
room: If this is your first visit to the USSR, you are welcome to it.Hilarious
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