Re: Am I losing my mind?
eNot just in dating rituals, but a lot of places eye contact is something you get punished for if you can't do, especially since increasingly these days interest is falling off in that most old fashioned of passed times known as conversation .
As to cultural expectations, as with a lot of gender expectations it is true now there are women who do take the initiative, however this isn't correlated as yet with the idea of men who would prefer to be asked being socially acceptable, eg, look at the ridicule of "a boy who can't get a date"
This is even more true in disability related matters, since one statistic I dug up while looking at my thesis stated that five out of six marriages which included one disabled person, the disabled person was female.
Then again, as I said, even for most men who go through all the standard rituals, the con ventional idea of finding a life partner by asking a comparative stranger to spend an evening and or night or two with you is rather nuts anyway.
Most of the people I know have successful marriages usually started off as friends first, knowing each other from some different context or social activity, or even the internet before considering anything romantic.
This is generally why I mention the friendship thing as pretty important.
Put it like this, being married to someone means having a full time 24 hour a day room mate, who will not just share your bed, but also your bedroom (including storage space), bathroom, kitchen, most likely all housework and house hold tasks, and likely half of a lot of other things you do to. You will see each other at the very best and worst moments, not only when your feeling great, but also when your tired, grumpy or ill.
"sharing your life" with someone means just that, so you had
; well better make sure you get on with each other and can live together without driving each other nuts .
I was actually amazed myself how easy this process was for Mrs. Dark and I, though of course we had the advantage that before we actually started living together we'd spent literally hours conversing, talking about each others likes and dislikes even down to food and house organization, so we were about as prepared as we could be, which is not much .
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