Re: questions about dating and atraction
Yes, dating in the modern age does seem to be more trouble than it's worth, from my perspective at least. I could never just swipe right for a good time, or wade through hundreds of one-word messages on a dating site just to go out with someone, have a lukewarm experience with them, and never see them again. That sounds very emotionally draining to me, not least because I'm an introvert, and it takes time for me to warm up to people. The expectation that we have just a couple of hours to get to know each other and then bang is just not my thing either. Don't get me wrong, as long as those kinds of things are safe and consensual for all involved, I have absolutely no problem with it if that's your preference, but I'd never be compatible with a person like that. The vast majority of relationships I've been in have started out as friendships. I don't think I'm demisexual, because I can, and have, felt strong attraction to people I didn't really know, but for me, the physical side of a relationship is so much better when it's more of an evolution than something that just happens out of lust. I don't know if it's because I have a hard time opening up to people in general, or because of stuff that's happened in my past, but that's just how I am. It seems that most people nowadays are just out for a good time, and, while that's fine for them, it isn't so much for me. I feel that I'd probably have to go through the motions and do what they wanted, though, since this is such a common expectation now, and maybe I'm just a prude or something. This, among other things, is the reason I'm definitely not looking for a relationship.
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