*giggle* Excellent! I particularly like the Ka6/Quintus and the "Keepit
traffic" ones.
Teal
On 18/02/2013 12:24 PM, Adam Woolley wrote:
Some light humour for a change, gliding related of course! You've probably all
heard of 'Chuck Norris' jokes, well the juniors have made Ingo Renner the Chuck
Norris of gliding - the first one is my favourite. Here's what we all came up
with, enjoy!
Ingo Renners alitude is always set to 00.00 HG. Ingo Renner is never under
pressure.
Ingo Renner has never been set a task. "task" implies there is a challenge.
Ingo Renner can out drink Michael Sommer... And fly further the next day
When Ingo Renner says "nice cirrus" he is refering to the type cloud he has
thermalled to the base of
When Ingo Renner thermals, his glider doesn't climb, he moves the earth down.
Ingo Renner doesn't request clearance, Ingo Renner states intentions.
Ingo Renner never lands in a cross wind. The wind would never dare to cross
Ingo Renner.
Ingo Renner was told to ident, so the controller was greeted with a fist coming
out of his radar screen.
Ingo Renner was once denied a clearance... once.
Ingo Renner doesn't shoot approaches, he kills them!
Ingo Renner always declares a task... one month in advance
Ingo Renner can taste thermals before he feels them
Spot tracker is yet to spot or track Ingo Renner
Hijackers squawk 7500 when Ingo Renner is on board.
Ingo renner does not release, the tug runs away scared.
Ingo renners discus was custom made without ailerons, he chooses to climb
straight ahead.
Ingo renner does not understand the term "netto". All he sees is 10knots up.
The term "Polar" comes from the way Ingo Renner flies, Ice cold.
Ingo Renner does not do annual checks, instructors are privileged to learn from
him.
Ingo Renner once did a form 2 on a KA6. The result is called a Quintus.
Ingo Renner doesn't buy winglets, he just stares down a wingtip until they grow.
Ingo Renner once thought he outlanded. Then realized he was just home. First.
Again.
They once thought Ingo Renner came back for a relight.. They didn't realise he
had already finished the task.
Hi. I'm Ingo. That is all.
Ingo Renner once flew The space shuttle, from a winch launch, around an FAI
1000km triangle.
Ingo Renner doesn't follow Cu, Cu follow Ingo Renner
Ingo Renner is always on final glide.
Ingo Renner doesn't fly standard class, Ingo Renner flies awesome class.
Ingo Renner needs a bigger continent to truly "max it out".
Ingo Renner once flew a 1000km FAI Triangle in Europe, and never left the
country he started in. That country was Vatican City.
The hardest thing about setting a record is coming up with something Ingo
Renner hasn't done yet.
Ingo Renner doesn't fly McCready, Ingo Renner flies VNe
Ingo Renner rigged a blanik in 5 minutes.
Ingo Renner doesn't need an undercarriage...
Ingo Renner doesn't tape his glider because all they have is thousand mile an
hour tape.
Ingo Renner knows what every single knob, lever and handle in a kestrel does.
Ingo Rennet dosent land after last light, the sun dosent set on Ingo Renner...
Cat E circling approaches were invented for Ingo Renner
Ingo Renner can thermal a PIK. In the rain.
Ingo Renner doesn't need a pink shirt and cravat (Sunship game, Gleb)
Ingo Renner dosent need to do a circuit - the runways align for Ingo Renner
Ingo Renner doesn't find thermals, he looks at the ground till one appears
Ingo Renners variometer doesn't have negative values. The air never dares to
sink on Ingo Renner's path.
Ingo's only question about the weather, is wether or not to do 1000 or 1500
On a blue day Ingo is his own trigger source
Ingo doesn't need an aerotow, he just winds his altimeter up
"Keepit traffic, Ingo Renner is 400 mi to the SE inbound, 500 ft, final glide.
keepit..."
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