Authors,

While reviewing this document during AUTH48, please resolve (as necessary) the 
following questions, which are also in the source file.


1) <!-- [rfced] Sections 2.2 and 2.3 also include descriptions of labels defined
in this document. Should these sections also be mentioned in this
sentence?

Original:
   The label identifies the type of secret that is being conveyed;
   see Section 2.1 for a description of the labels that are defined
   in this document.

Perhaps:
   The label identifies the type of secret that is being conveyed;
   see Sections 2.1, 2.2, and 2.3 for descriptions of the labels that are 
defined
   in this document.
-->


2) <!--[rfced] Is "the Random" correct here, or should this be updated to "the
Random field" or "the value of the Random field"?

Original:
   If ECH was
   successfully negotiated for a given connection, these labels MUST be
   followed by the Random from the Inner ClientHello.  Otherwise, the
   Random from the Outer ClientHello MUST be used.
   ...
   These labels MUST always use the Random from the Outer ClientHello.

Perhaps:
   If ECH was
   successfully negotiated for a given connection, these labels MUST be
   followed by the Random field from the Inner ClientHello.  Otherwise, the
   Random field from the Outer ClientHello MUST be used.
   ...
   These labels MUST always use the Random field from the Outer ClientHello.
-->


3) <!-- [rfced] Would updating "(e.g., [RFC8471])" and "(e.g., [RFC9261])" as
follows be more precise and clear? Please review.

Original:
   For instance, exporters might be used for session
   bindings (e.g., [RFC8471]), authentication (e.g., [RFC9261]), or
   other derived secrets that are used in application context.

Perhaps:
   For instance, exporters might be used for session
   bindings (e.g., in the Token Binding protocol [RFC8471]),
   authentication (e.g., in the mechanism defined in [RFC9261]), or
   other derived secrets that are used in application context.
-->


4) <!--[rfced] We have some questions about the citations and section pointers 
in
the sentence below.

a) RFC-to-be 9846 (draft-ietf-tls-rfc8446bis), which uses the citation [TLS13]
in this document, obsoletes RFC 8446. Should the citation to [RFC8446] in this
sentence be updated to [TLS13] and the reference entry for [RFC8446] be
removed? Also, note that Section 1.2 and Appendix E.1 in RFC 8446 seem to
align with Section 1.3 and Appendix F.1 of RFC-to-be 9846
(draft-ietf-tls-rfc8446bis). Please confirm.

b) RFC 4492 has been obsoleted by RFC 8422. We recommend replacing [RFC4492]
with [RFC8422] in this sentence. If this change is made, the section pointers
will also likely need to be updated. Sections 2.2 and 2.4 in RFC 4492 seem to
align with Sections 2.1 and 2.2 in RFC 8422. Please review.

(If RFC 4492 must be referenced, we suggest mentioning RFC 8422 (e.g., RFC
4492 has been obsoleted by RFC 8422) per Section 4.8.6 in the RFC Style Guide
(RFC 7322).)

Original:
   Forward secrecy guarantees provided in TLS 1.3 (see Section 1.2 and
   Appendix E.1 of [RFC8446]) and some modes of TLS 1.2 (such as those
   in Sections 2.2 and 2.4 of [RFC4492]) do not hold if key material is
   recorded.

Perhaps:
   Forward secrecy guarantees provided in TLS 1.3 (see Section 1.3 and
   Appendix F.1 of [TLS13]) and some modes of TLS 1.2 (such as those
   in Sections 2.1 and 2.2 of [RFC8422]) do not hold if key material is
   recorded.
-->   


5) <!-- [rfced] IANA Considerations section

a) Section 4.1: FYI - We made a minor change (i.e., added a period) to the
media type template. If no objections, we will ask IANA to update the template
at https://www.iana.org/assignments/media-types/application/sslkeylogfile
accordingly prior to publication.


b) Section 4.2: Please review the suggestions below for the description of
EARLY_EXPORTER_SECRET and let us know which is preferred.

Note: If this is description updated, we will request that IANA update the
registry to match the edited document prior to publication. Link to registry:
https://www.iana.org/assignments/tls-parameters/tls-parameters.xhtml#tls-sslkeylogfile-labels

Original:
  Early exporters secret

Perhaps:
  Secret for early exporters

Or:
  Early exporter secret


c) Section 4.2: We note that these two sentences include two different
citations that describe the role of the designated expert (i.e., Section 17 of
[RFC8447] and [RFC8126]). Is the intent to cite both references, or is citing
just one sufficient to aid the reader?

Original:
   The role of the designated expert is described in
   Section 17 of [RFC8447].  The designated expert [RFC8126] ensures
   that the specification is publicly available.

Perhaps (include both citations in first sentence):
   The role of the designated expert is described in
   Section 17 of [RFC8447] and Section 5 of [RFC8126]. The designated
   expert ensures that the specification is publicly available.

Or (only include citation in first sentence and remove citation in second):
   The role of the designated expert is described in
   Section 17 of [RFC8447]. The designated
   expert ensures that the specification is publicly available.


d) Is "location" the best word choice here? Would "organization", "group", or
something else be an improvement?

Original:
   It is sufficient to
   have an Internet-Draft (that is posted and never published as an RFC)
   or to cite a document from another standards body, industry
   consortium, or any other location.

Perhaps:
   It is sufficient to
   cite an Internet-Draft (that is posted but not published as an RFC)
   or a document from another standards body, an industry
   consortium, or any other organization.
-->


6) <!--[rfced] This document contains an informative reference to [RFC8792], but
the only mentions of RFC 8792 are in notes within <artwork> in Appendix A.
Where may we cite [RFC8792] in the text? We suggest adding a sentence
at the beginning of Appendix A as follows.

Perhaps:
  The examples below use line wrapping per [RFC8792].
-->


7) <!-- [rfced] Please review the artwork elements used in Appendix A. Should
these be tagged as sourcecode instead? If these should be sourcecode,
please let us whether the "type" attribute should be set. If the current
list of preferred values for "type"
(see https://www.rfc-editor.org/rpc/wiki/doku.php?id=sourcecode-types)
does not contain an applicable type, then feel free to suggest a new one.
Also, it is acceptable to leave the "type" attribute not set.
-->


8) <!-- [rfced] The terms listed below are enclosed in <tt> in this document.
Some of these terms (e.g., "secret") appear both with and without <tt>.
Please review to ensure the usage of <tt> is correct and consistent. Let
us know if any updates are needed.

application/sslkeylogfile
client_application_traffic_secret_0
client_random
exporter_secret
secret
server_application_traffic_secret_0
shared_secret
SSLKEYLOGFILE
-->


9) <!-- [rfced] FYI - We have added expansions for the following abbreviations
per Section 3.6 of RFC 7322 ("RFC Style Guide"). Please review each
expansion in the document carefully to ensure correctness.

 Key Encapsulation Mechanism (KEM)
 Network Security Services (NSS)
-->


10) <!-- [rfced] Please review the "Inclusive Language" portion of the online
Style Guide <https://www.rfc-editor.org/styleguide/part2/#inclusive_language>
and let us know if any changes are needed.  Updates of this nature typically
result in more precise language, which is helpful for readers.

For example, please consider whether "master" should be updated.
-->


Thank you.

Alanna Paloma and Rebecca VanRheenen
RFC Production Center



On Dec 16, 2025, at 10:29 AM, [email protected] wrote:

*****IMPORTANT*****

Updated 2025/12/16

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--------------------------------------
RFC9850 (draft-ietf-tls-keylogfile-05)

Title            : The SSLKEYLOGFILE Format for TLS
Author(s)        : M. Thomson, Y. Rosomakho, H. Tschofenig
WG Chair(s)      : Joseph A. Salowey, Sean Turner, Deirdre Connolly

Area Director(s) : Deb Cooley, Paul Wouters

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