Rick,
Let me have a look at what you've done and Daniel's edits to it, and offer an opinion before we go any further. I'll get back to you asap.


Regards, Jean

At 10:40 AM 23/02/2005 +0000, you wrote:
Daniel,

I'm not exactly sure what you want to have, a User's guide or a
brochure.  Since you just began editing my work I am assuming that you
will trash the rest of the content much the same. When I took the
Chapter over I was told by Jean to lengthen it, to add content:

************************BEGIN quoted text*********************

This is a tiny chapter. Only a couple of pages of content. <snip>

If you can think of content that should be added to this chapter, please
go ahead and do so.

At the moment I don't have time to add content (I truly wish I did have
time), but I'd like to make some observations, now that I've had a
better look at the chapter.

I think what you've got is good, but ...

I see three audiences for this chapter:
(1) New users not migrating from another major office suite.
(2) New users who are migrating from another major office suite.
(3) People upgrading from OOo 1.x.

The comparison of features tables are good for people in group 1, but
putting on my "new OOo user" hat, I'm left wondering "is that all there
is?" I think a more detailed listing (not comparison) of some features
might help.

A "What's new in 2.0" section would be really good, especially for the
people in group 3.

For group 1, the more detailed listing -- and brief description -- of
features would be good too. For one thing, some of these people will not
be aware of many of the things an office suite can do. For another, the
listing can help lead readers to the chapters (or guides) describing how
(and why) to use those features.

Jean

*************************END quoted text*********************


I don't think my text is that complex...in fact it is very informative. It contains information that you would need to spend some time finding on the OOo website and from several other sources. I believe that the text on Open Source and OOo's licensing speaks to "New users who are migrating from another major office suite." Switching from proprietary software to F/OSS is a MAJOR deal. They need to know why F/OSS is better, or at least comparable.

Your comment "This entire paragraph is intended for current 1.x users.
Though this is an important audience, this isn't the right place for
that kind of information." is wrong since the paragraph ends with the
line: "If you are new to OpenOffice.org, its Open Source development,
and the vibrant community that produces it, you will find it beneficial
to read this chapter."

You suggest "some of your introductory content should be relocated to
appendices (e.g. "history of OOo")" if this were a research paper or
thesis, I might agree. But I would say that most users NEVER look in an
Appendix for such content...shortcut keys or support information, maybe
(but only in desperation), but fluff like history, never! If my text
"bores" them they can skip to the section they want to read...an odd
thing about your audience is that they will skip what they think is
unnecessary and read only what they want.  You seem to think that they
will be insulted and not finish reading the chapter?

Look at some of the version 1.x docs...compare them with professional
docs and you will see that the OOo docs lack depth (my opinion as a
user. I'm not a professional technical writer). I looked them over as a
prospective user and found them useless for the most part...this is the
reason I thought I might be useful here.

I know that my grammar is poor and I tend to be wordy and use
colloquialisms, so I accept editing on that level. The funny thing is
you even deleted entire sections that came from _your_ first draft.

I'm not discouraged...angry is a better word. I just wasted a lot of
time on this document (there was a lot of research required for this
chapter, too). I need some time to decide whether I want to continue
with this project. My time is valuable whether I donate it or get paid
for it.

You might as well finish this chapter now! I've lost the taste for this
nonsense right now. Maybe you folks should try "mentoring" people with
their first solo work so that they do not waste time on useless content.

"Don't get discouraged..."?

On Tue, 2005-02-22 at 20:23 -0500, Daniel Carrera wrote:
> Hi Rick,
>
> I have uploaded a reviewed version of the file.
>
> http://oooauthors.org/groups/authors/userguide2/gettingstarted/feedback/What_is_OOo_22Feb05_RB_DC.sxw/file_view
>
> You obviously know the subject matter well. But that has caused you to
> write a rather complex document. In my opinion, it violates the principle
> of Plain English. That is, using the simplest terms and explanations that
> will get a point accross. It is hard to overstate the importance of this.
> I also think that some of your introductory content should be relocated to
> appendices (e.g. "history of OOo"). We don't want users to feel like they
> need to know all the details to answer the question "what is OOo?".
>
> Don't get discouraged Rick. Things will get easier, I promise. Getting the
> first chapter published is by far the hardest, because you have to deal
> with a lot of tech writing issues. The next chapter is easier, and the
> next one is easier yet.
>
> Cheers,
> Daniel.
>
>
>
> On Tue, Feb 22, 2005 at 04:24:47PM +0000, Rick Barnes wrote:
> > I have just uploaded a new draft of the "What is OOo?" chapter, the last
> > reviews were fairly light...is this close to publishing???
>
>
--
Regards,


Rick Barnes
www.nostabo.net

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