Dear Allan and All, Although there was no risk, by Robin's suggesting WWOOFER, of giving me << false hope that would take her [my] energy from discovering appropriate solutions for her [my] situation >> -- as I already *have* discovered (at least an interim) appropriate solution: (My search for) a house to buy where I can live and avoid chem exposures long enough to possibly heal from them! --
Allan's post did reinforce my observation, that I made in posts responding to Robin and Gil's replies to my initial letter/essay submission, that Chemical Injury can incapacitate a person for a WWOOFER (or for any other work exchange) experience. Agreeing with another point you made, Allan, although pollen sensitivity (also mentioned by Sharon, thank you for your input) only recently developed as one result of the original serious chemical injury to the body's detoxification system, such an ALLERGY offshoot of the CHEMICAL INJURY initiating process (2 different animals), also does (or can) detract from a person's work reliability (although the effects of *allergy* can -- unlike chemical injury -- be medicated away to some extent -- with, e.g., antihistamines). Now, in this final post to the list on the subject of MCS-CI so as not to take any more time here on what may seem a rather individual problem, I will say that I regret that the letter I sent with my essay -- in which letter I asked listmembers to notify me backchannel if they hear of a modest (and modestly priced) house for sale in the U.S., preferably untermiticided, and on a bufferzone of land -- may have given an impression that I am a whiny crybaby who wants adults to do for me what I do not wish to do for myself. Rather, my three paragraphs about my personal experience of how the MCS-CI condition makes "casual" chemical exposures unsustainable for the organism, were intended to give a better idea of what I needed in a house, and by way of describing the situation NOW, to convey what a great blessing someone who can direct information to me about a possibly suitable house for sale, would be providing someone (me) who otherwise may not be able to contribute to society in the FUTURE, in the only way open to me (short of a cure). That is to say, too, that I am ALWAYS <<looking towards where I should be going [in addition to] ... where I [am] at the moment>> (if this was a lesson being offered, I've known it and lived it from at least adolescence on), -- which is why I seek not only a house where I can function/write, mentally/physically without multiple lengthy recovery periods, but also a cure (which may depend upon finding such a house, both to reduce chemical exposures and to allow a personal garden). If by a "heads-up" informed by my situation, someone can send me info that will help me solve my problem, that is a great blessing to me without any more cost to them in time or energy than they feel comfortable to expend. Although it is in the democratic tradition to try and "correct the record", I even hesitated to write as much as I just have about my personal situation, considering how highly indeed I do value everyone's time. That said, with the perspective of having meditated on how I can best "utilize" my experience of this 12-years'-long illness, for "good" (lemonade out of lemons), I see MCS-CI in more than personal terms, but just as much, as a paradigm for global ecological collapse. Namely, after a lengthy enough time of exposure to chemicals that synergistically as well as individually work to incrementally deteriorate then destroy elements of the individual's (or Earth's) ecosystem, including ability to sustainably process and eliminate waste products, the interlocking systems (e.g., neuroendocrinoimmunologicocardiovasculomuskuloskeletal, etc.) and subsystems to systems (e.g., cellular), interpenetratedly can become so damaged (if adequate support -- whether, e.g., nutritive, and/or as respite from further damage, and/or ... -- is not provided) that the entirety collapses, and sometimes in ways that seem perplexing to the observer (the term "stochastic" change comes to mind). In short, adapting a concept to my current point, that Allan raised in the narrow context of the unsuitability of MCS-CIers for work programs (<<let alone spare the time to listen to them talk about their problems or express unique needs>>), I don't see my needs as unique (except, naturally, in an environment where no-one else has MCS-CI and I depend on others to not expose me to chemicals). I don't see my needs as unique not only because there are so many of us with this condition (and I hope to share with all whom I can reach -- 550 subscribers alone on one MCS-CI list I'm on and there are tens of thousands more "out there" who are NOT internet-connected to an MCS-CI list -- any insight or help I derive about healing the condition) but also because our numbers are growing exponentially along with the increase in indoor-air and overall global pollution. As for those << millions of other people [who] are breathing those same crappy molecules and eliminating them without getting loopy, weak or woozy? >>, I guess they don't have MCS-CI (or at least, not as advanced a case). On the MCS-CI list it's been pointed out that whereas one person's vulnerability to chemicals may first be manifested as MCS-CI, another's may be as cancer, or heart disease, or genetic damage that doesn't show anything on the surface, but may manifest in future generations. Likewise, natch, one person's MCS-CI may not manifest as woozy loopiness but may as a heart attack (documented). Anyway, I won't take further list bandwidth on the subject (the letters replying to Gil's and Robin's, that I sent earlier today, were written before seeing how my initial letter, sent with my essay on the essential identity of matter and spirit, may have come off). Back-channel is welcome should anyone think it worthy of their time or interest to do so, including, Allan, if you would care (and/or have time) to send me any info you may have on <<the excellent mask/filters that are available now for reasonable prices (and do not mold between uses like they did when I needed them)>> in which you have found merit (I already am experimenting with charcoal for clearing the leaky bowel syndrome, thank you for that suggestion tho), or anything else you found particularly helpful in curing yourself of MCS-CI/CFIDS, I would be grateful. I am already very grateful for having received the occasion and the forum in which to express and develop my thoughts, and to learn so much from people who are cutting-edge thinkers (y'all). Thank you, and take care. -Lily You wrote, << >WWOOF means Willing Workers On Organic Farms (...also Biodynamic). >I know of this because I worked on a Biodynamic Farm in Canada that >accepted many WWOOF'ers from all over the world. The typical >arrangement is that people come to live on the farm to learn about >farming in exchange of labor. But... I've also seen people come for >therapeutic cures... Sometimes living on a BD farm, eating BD food, >and helping in whatever way possible can be just the right thing. I >know because I've seen people heal from the land. Here is a www >link for the US. ><http://www.wwoof.org/wpusa.html>http://www.wwoof.org/wpusa.html . >Perhaps you can find something just right for you. > Folks - I've hosted a lot of WWOOFERS in the past 5 years. Most of them have made great contributions to the farm; a pitiful few came to the farm hoping to exploit the program (they didn't stay with us for long). I personally do not know of a BD farm that could afford to carry someone who is too ill to work, let alone spare the time to listen to them talk about their problems or express unique needs - - at least not in the growing season, of course. The WWOOFING movement is based on that WILLING WORKERS aspect, which is a deep understanding of how much all biological farmers need the willing labor of capable workers. The workers, in my experience, get the satisfaction of supporting the whole foods movement by helping out on the farm and the opportunity to get deep insights into how another farmer works his patch. This picture, of course, can be substantially different on robust farms that have a sizeable paid staff. It's a wonderful program. I'd hate to see it abused and I'd hate to see Lily given false hope that would take her energy from discovering appropriate solutions for her situation. I do know BD farms that practice 'agrotherapy,' which is an oppotunity for the ill to heal in the healthy atmosphere of a living garden. Agrotherapy, in my experience, is a service that one pays for and not something that farmers I know can afford to provide for free or for the sort of labor that can be provided by the infirm. Having pretty much pulled myself through chronic fatigue and (officially diagnosed) multi-chemical sensitivities and into full time biodynamic farming in the past 20 years, I feel qualified to recommend that Lily experiment with the excellent mask/filters that are available now for reasonable prices (and do not mold between uses like they did when I needed them) and to experiment with charcoal for clearing the leaky bowel syndrome, always remembering that millions of other people are breathing those same crappy molecules and eliminating them without getting loopy, weak or woozy? In fact, to be honest with you, if you can't deal with the dry cleaners, you probably can't deal with the pollen load on a biological farm, particularly one rung with forests, like my own. Do I sound harsh? I probably do, but I have to say that a turning point in my own "cure," which is not to say that I know what is best for Lily, was the day that a college professor who patiently listened to me talk about how atrocious my life was due to chemicals until he apparently could take no more said "Can you hear how you sound like a goddam baby crying in a crib? What is it that you want, baby? What is it you think adults can do for you that you can't do for yourself? " I chewed on this one for a long time before I started looking towards where I should be going rather than where I at the moment. That said, does anyone know if Camphill programs have work exchange programs that someone with Lily's needs could participate in? -Allan>>
