He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.
Winston Churchill

I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great  pleasure
Clarence Darrow

He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the 
dictionary.
William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved  of it.
Mark Twain

He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.
Oscar Wilde

I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a  friend. 
If you have one.
George Bernard Shaw to Winston  Churchill

... followed by Churchill's response:

Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second, if there is one.
Winston Churchill

I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here.
Stephen Bishop

He is a self-made man and worships his creator.
John Bright

I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial.
Irvin S. Cobb

He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others.
Samuel Johnson

Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on  it?
Mark Twain

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they  go.
Oscar Wilde

Lady Astor once remarked to Winston Churchill at a Dinner Party, Winston, if 
you were my husband,  <http://keralites.net/>

 I would poison your coffee! Winston replied, Madam if I were your husband I 
would drink it!

Lady Astor also once remarked to Winston Churchill at another Dinner Party, Sir 
Winston, you're drunk!
To which, Winston replied, Yes, Madam, I am. And you're ugly!  But in  the 
morning,  I will be sober.

And you will still be ugly!

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