Summary: This document has issues that need to be addressed
         before progressing to IETF Last Call.

This document was very difficult to review. Please call out anyone
who provided a substantive review in the document quality section
of an updated shepherd writeup - they deserve the acknowledgement!

I think there might be places where the structure of the document
became stressed as the design changed over time. Please consider
an editorial pass focusing on organizing the resulting implementation
requirements in ways that are easier to reference.

Major issues

  - The document's proposed use of PUBLISH is not consistent with the
    semantics of that method. It attempts to use PUBLISH to affect
    the subscription state, not the state of the event being
    subscribed to (it's telling that PUBLISHing to this event package
    doesn't allow setting the state being subscribed to). Among other
    things, this prevents separating the state agent from the state
    authority. The document modifies how PUBLISH identifies the
    resource being manipulated by looking at the From URI and not
    only at the Request-URI.  How the Callee's agent responds to the
    request to change this subscription state is underspecified -
    when can it reject a request? What is the caller supposed to do
    if the request fails?

  - As written, the first paragraph of section 9.7 asks this package
    to violate the basic mechanics of RFC3265. It is a violation of
    the architecture to completely ignore the the expiration time
    value requested in an initial or refresh SUBSCRIBE request. The
    responder may choose an expiration time less than or equal to the
    value there. It may not choose a longer expiration time for the
    subscription.

  - There is some important conversation missing from the security
    considerations section.

      - The dialog event package requires authentication, and digest
        authentication is mandatory to implement. This package
        doesn't appear to require any authentication other than
        presenting a (possibly well known) URI. More discussion of
        the policy for accepting subscriptions is needed to allow
        implementers to protect the privacy of the callee. Otherwise,
        it becomes trivial to use this package to obtain, for
        instance, information about the callee's phone usage.
        Similarly, the presence event package has a rich
        authorization model, and discusses the security (particularly
        privacy) implications of having the authorization settings
        too open.

      - As written, there does not appear to be any protection
        against an attacker causing everyone else that might be in a
        queue to be marked not-available, ensuring his call moves to
        the front of the queue. He only needs to know the AoRs of the
        callers he might be competing with and send PUBLISH requests
        with those AoRs in the From header field.

      - What keeps a new caller from just adding the m= attribute to
        a new INVITE in order to get the preferential treatment by
        the network and the callee's UA described in several sections
        of the document? Was an approach that used a temp-GRUU
        considered instead? It would not have the property of being
        as easy to guess as adding an m= URI parameter to an AoR.

      - A malicious callee could return several (many) NOTIFYs with
        different to-tags, each containing a different cc-URI,
        leading the caller to parallel-fork a large number of
        subscriptions to a victim.

Some questions

  - Section 9.10 calls out that subscribers need to be prepared to
    get NOTIFYs from multiple places due to forks in the SUBSCRIBE,
    but nothing in the document explores how this affects the
    call-completion application. What keeps the following scenario
    from occurring: Adam tries to call me, but I'm busy (on my desk
    phone). He subscribes for call completion, and the subscribe gets
    forked to both my desk and home phone. My home phone is not busy,
    so it sends a NOTIFY with "ready" right away. Adam's phone calls
    my home phone.

  - What keeps this from happening? Adam calls and I reject his call
    because I'm waiting for another  (I press X and the phone just
    reports that I'm busy). Adam's phone subscribes for
    call-completion and gets a NOTIFY of "ready" - his phone calls
    mine again, forcing me to re-reject him. This repeats until I
    take my phone off the hook (or engage a global DND) causing me to
    not be able to receive the call I was waiting for.

  - Would a callee ever want to subscribe to call-completion.winfo to
    see who's in his queue? Will the current design prevent
    implementing a server for call-completion.winfo?

Remaining issues (mostly in document order)

  - application/call-completion needs to be sent to type review.

  - It would be useful to more carefully describe exactly what the
    resource being subscribed to.

  - Please call out how this document updated 3261 in the
    introduction.

  - Section 4.2 paragraph 1: Is 100rel required? recommended?

  - It's not easy to understand from the text why the subscribing UA
    is attempting to subscribe to multiple URIs (the first occurrence
    is in 4.2 paragraph 4). Some additional motivating text would
    help.

  - The document mischaracterizes 'merged' requests as being those
    that share the same Call-ID. As Section 8.2.2.2 of RFC3261
    defines, it's more than that - the things that have to be the
    same are the From tag, Call-Id, and CSeq. This occurs several
    places in the document:  6.2 second paragraph, description of
    example in section 8, 9.7 third paragraph. It's worth noting that
    the UA core in 8.2.2.2 does this merge detection - you are
    restating a requirement, not adding one -  you should probably
    just note that the UA will behave as required by that section of
    RFC3261.

  - It's worth explicitly calling out (at least in section 6.2) that
    you are expecting the subscribing UA to fork its own requests (so
    that the merge behavior you are describing can take place). This
    means keeping more than the Call-Id constant. An implementer will
    have to select or develop a SIP implementation that allows them
    to do that.

  - There needs to be additional clarity to the specification of the
    use of the service-retention indication. What is the caller's
    (the subscriber's) endpoint supposed to do differently when it
    sees the service-retention option arrive in a NOTIFY? The
    difference in the behavior of the callee's system is hard to
    extract - the most salient description is the last paragraph of
    4.2.

  - Section 6.2 first paragraph: m parameter of a SUBSCRIBE SHOULD
    match the m parameter passed through the Call-Info header. Why is
    this not MUST?

  - Why does the document specify a request-disposition of no-cancel
    for SUBSCRIBE requests? An intermediary cannot send a CANCEL to
    forked legs of a SUBSCRIBE request in the first place.

  - In section 6.2 paragraph 4, you mean to say the caller's agent
    must be prepared to receive multiple NOTIFYs establishing
    different dialogs for each initial SUBSCRIBE request it sends. It
    is not possible for the agent to receive multiple (final)
    responses to the SUBSCRIBE request itself.

  - The string 'cc-state' appears for the first time in section 6.3
    with no context. The discussion of state before that in the
    document is a superset of the states represented with cc-state.
    Please at least provide a forward pointer. It would be better to
    explicitly describe what cc-state is before you get to this
    section.

  - The first sentence in section 6.3 is hard to parse. Could it be
    broken into more than one sentence? Why are the SHOULDs in this
    section not MUSTs?

  - In section 7.1, why is the callee's monitor required to send at
    least one non-100 provisional (with a Call-Info in it)? Is it
    because the final response might not be delivered to the calling
    endpoint due to forking. If so, don't you need to require 100rel?

  - Why is the SHOULD in 7.1 paragraph 3 not a MUST?

  - Why does 7.1 paragraph 4 start "When applicable,"?

  - In this version of the document, the last paragraph of 7.1 is the
    only definition of the possible values for the m= URI parameter.
    It would help to list them with the definition of the parameter
    itself.

  - The requirements around forking in section 7.2 paragraph 2 belong
    in section 9. Why is the requirement to respond with a 482 to all
    but one fork a SHOULD and not a MUST?

  - Why is the SHOULD in 7.3 paragraph 2 not a MUST?

  - Subsections of Section 7 use SHALL instead of MUST - it would be
    better to be consistent throughout the document.

  - In 7.4 paragraph one, where you say "if the CC call fails", it
    would be better to say "if the CC call is not accepted". The call
    could fail without the callee's monitor seeing any of the
    signalling.

  - In 7.4 paragraph 1, last sentence, in what circumstance would the
    callee's monitor NOT terminate the relevant subscription?

  - 7.4 paragraph 2 (which assumes the UA can only handle one call at
    a time) should be made consistent with 7.3 paragraph 3 (which
    allows UAs that can support multiple calls)

  - 7.6 paragraph 1 says "SHALL process the queue as described in
    subclause 7.3". But 7.3 does not talk about processing queues.

  - In the example, you show a 487 to the invite and motivate it by
    some proxy having generated a CANCEL. That proxy would have
    received a 487, but assuming it got no better responses from any
    other leg, it would most likely send a 480. If there weren't
    intervening proxies, the response might be one of several
    400-class responses (perhaps a 408). Please call out that there
    may be many variations in this failure response.

  - Proxies will not aggregate Call-Info header fields from multiple
    final responses into the response they send upstream. In a
    general deployment, the only time you will see that the callee
    supports call-completion (at least given how the capability is
    signaled in this document) is if it's final response is chosen as
    "best" by every proxy in the chain. It's worth pointing out that
    some 4xx responses from the callee's UA are more likely to be
    chosen as "best" than others. It's also probably worth pointing
    out that in in situations like you allude to in the example in
    section 8, when proxies cancel legs, the 487 they stimulate from
    the callee's UAs are not likely to be chosen as "best".

  - The third paragraph of section 9.4 is very unclear. I can't parse
    the first sentence at all. In the second sentence, it might be
    clearer to say "can never" instead of "cannot" (assuming my guess
    at what the paragraph is trying to say is correct). The third
    sentence doesn't make sense, and I wonder if the text matched a
    previous design better? Moving between available and
    not-available (using PUBLISH) doesn't affect the subscription
    duration - what is the sentence trying to talk about when it
    mentions granting a duration as part of resuming a subscription?

  - Section 9.5 third paragraph points to a format described in
    section 8. It means to point to section 10.

  - The description of NOTIFY bodies in section 9.5 allows bodies of
    type application/sdp to be sent in notifies as long as that type
    occurs in the Accept header field of the most recent SUBSCRIBE
    request on the dialog. Is that intentional?

  - Section 9.6 is vague about a call-completion service specific
    timer. It points into 9.4 claiming the timer is described there,
    but 9.4 is talking about subscription duration, only noting that
    the duration default value is chosen based on a timer value from
    other specifications. Why is this MAY important? What are the
    implementations supposed to do with this implication?

  - In the second paragraph of section 9.7, should the 480 include a
    retry-after? Why was 403 chosen for long-term-denial _error_
    situations. Why isn't that a 500?

  - The first sentence of section 9.8 would be much more effective if
    it said (or pointed to text that describes) what the event
    triggering conditions actually are.

  - The third paragraph of section 9.8 has a MUST requirement that is
    conditional on an agent initiating an INVITE "promptly", but
    there's no characterization of "promptly" in the document. How
    does it account for the time it takes to reconfirm the caller is
    actually present and available before initiating the INVITE due
    to a recall? (This should also be accounted for in the first part
    of the security considerations).

  - Section 9.9 (corresponding to section 4.4.8 of RFC3261) is not
    adequate. It needs to actually describe the package specific
    subscription processing (including how the state is built), or
    provide a finer reference to where that specification lies than
    "in this and possibly in other documents". Section 7 has most of
    this information, but it's fairly widely scattered. Please
    consider consolidating the normative behavior into one place.

  - Section 9.11 claims the service typically involves a single
    notification per notifier per subscription. This cannot be the
    case. There will typically be three - the initial notify in
    response to the subscribe request, the notify representing the
    state transition from queued to ready, and the notify
    corresponding to the termination of the subscription. (It is not
    clear from the document when you expect the notification of
    "ready" to immediately terminate the subscription, if ever.)

  - The timing restrictions in section 9.11 seem artificial, and
    interact badly with the application this package is intended to
    support (the implication is that the server should delay  send a
    "ready" for example). Can the document explain how these
    restrictions were chosen?

  - Why does the call-completion information format make a provision
    for X- headers since you ignore lines with unknown names?

  - Instead of saying "Two lines with the same name MUST NOT be
    present, except where specifically permitted", consider saying
    "The header lines defined in this document can occur at most once
    in any given call-completion document. Extensions must define
    whether defined lines may occur more than once. How likely is
    this format to be extended? Do these need to be put in a registry?

  - Why does the syntax for cc-URI allow cc-URI header line
    parameters? You certainly want the URI to be able to contain URI
    parameters, but when would you ever use the header line
    parameters? What you have now allows

cc-URI: random display text <sip:name@domain;uri-param=uri-value>;cc-uri-header-param-name=cc-uri-header-param-value

    How is having that display text ever useful? When would you every use
    a cc-uri-header-param? In other words, why isn't this simply
    cc-URI = "cc-URI" HCOLON addr-spec?

  - Item 2 in the security considerations section is unclear. It
    seems to be placing a requirement on the subscriber (the caller),
    but it's not clear what that requirement is (don't suspend any
    subscriptions longer than a typical call? than some duration a
    user entered for _this_ call? or what?). What's the subscriber
    supposed to do if it would have suspended a subscription that
    long - terminate the subscription? How does this protect the
    privacy of the callee?

  - The media-type form sections should point to specific sections in
    this document. Consider calling out the most important
    interoperability and security considerations.

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