As I write this, there's a good chance the Brin-L Constitution discussion
will make it obsolete, which is a Good Thing.  Kudos to Jeroen for making
a concrete proposal in this regard.

----

In Buddhist insight meditation, one is taught that the way to dispell
negative and fearful thoughts that emerge in the course of sitting is to
plunge into them, analyze them, take them apart until one understands
exactly what they are and where they come from, and when that's done
you'll find the negativity gone.

Brin-L is a lot like a long meditation session.  Sometimes things are
placid; sometimes things get nasty like now.  When the nastiness arises
the habitual response is to tense up, become harsh, and experience
suffering.  To deal with this reflex Brin-L needs to be like a big
multi-brained Buddhist:  take some deep breaths to restore emotional
equilibrium, then penetrate the source of the problem with the mindfulness
of a curious child interested not in recrimination but in truth and
solutions.  In short, be scientific about it.

To that end:

What are we arguing about, and why?

Answer:  a lot of us are worried about a warning that Eileen delivered to
John that appeared draconian and abrupt, seeming as it did to come out of
nowhere.  Moreover, because Jeroen claimed that he had solicited the
opinions of the other listowners, many of our monkeyminds lept to another
big fear:  that there might be some kind of listowner collusion in
censoring opinions and tyrannizing listmembers with threats of banishment
should they fail to toe some line determined unilaterally by them.

Let's examine these fears.  One, is it really reasonable to fear that
Jeroen and Eileen are trying to be list-tyrants?  I mean, really?  I don't
think so.  For one, there is no pattern of behavior pointing to this
conclusion, just one clumsily handled etiquette warning.  Two, it's
arguable that if they were consipiring in some way, they wouldn't still be
arguing and debating with us how to manage the list.  Three, there's
nothing worthwhile to be gained from such a conspiracy, and Eileen and
Jeroen aren't that stupid, IMO.  Why destroy something good (Brin-L) for
the sake of having a false sense of control over it?  Such things are
quite possible, of course, but current events do not fit a pattern
of deliberate sabotage.  Rather, there was a clumsy warning, a volatile
response, an attempt to explain the warning that has gone somewhat awry,
and more volatile reponses.

If we want to understand what's going on, then the volatility needs to be
put aside for a little while.  Deep Breaths, y'all.

Now, as things stand, Eileen has already apologized for the harshness of
her initial warning, and she has confirmed that Jeroen did not "go running
to mommy."  She has also had some choice words <G> about listmember
attitudes in general, which I'll discuss later.  So, think hard about
this.  Under the circumstances, is there any reason to assume that either
Eileen or Jeroen are out to "get" anybody, or to impose their will
unilaterally on the list?  Any reason that isn't simply an expression of
purely reflexive libertarian paranoia?

No.  That doesn't mean our libertarian concerns aren't imporant in a
formal sense, but IMO we can take comfort in the knowledge that nobody is
actively or intentionally seeking to harm Brin-L or even John.

Doesn't that feel better?  Now we know that there's no enemy except the
impulse to create enemies where unhappiness has arisen.  (After all, we
need to explain our unhappiness right?)

Time for a bitter truth:  can we swallow it?  Point of fact:  many of us
Americans find ourselves very frustrated when trying to argue with Jeroen
about a certain sensitive topic.  The reasons may vary from person to
person, but it's very easy to let that frustration erupt into suspicion when
our minds have an ostensible reason to connect Jeroen with a perceived act of
tyranny.  We leap to conclusions.  But the foregoing discussion, I think,
shows that such conclusions are not credible.

More deep breaths.  It's time to cut Jeroen and Eileen some slack.

Let's consider the truth of something Eileen said:  that Jeroen has
historically invested a lot of time not just in arguing points but in
outside chores aimed at keeping Brin-L going -- handling the mechanical
chores of listowner faithfully, maintaining a Brin-L website, and so on.
I think it would be wrong to throw these considerations away over a nasty
tiff like the one we're having now.  Jeroen has a long history of
investing his time in the well-being of Brin-L, which shoes a pattern of
good intent towards the list.  Don't ignore that, or throw it away.

Another deep breath, and another question:

Why did we react so strongly at all, with fear and anger rather than
bemusement at the whole situation?  I think this is connected with the
state of the list in general.  Eileen pointed out that Brin-L has been in a
depressing cycle of arguments producing ill-will for a while now.  We look
back to a "golden age" when Brin offered choice topics for discussion and
when Jo Anne handled hot tempers with grace and tact.  We long to have
that feeling of privilege again, and we are frustrated that we don't know
how to bring it back.  So, when bad things happen, that underlying
bitterness jumps out and displays itself as a lack of patience and an
abundance of suspicion and ire.

But, as Dr. Brin himself would say, looking back towards a golden age is
contrary to the spirit of our culture.  Our modern scientific culture is
supposed to see a golden age in the future, not the past, because we know
we have the ability to understand and to exert (some) control over events.
And although many of us have complained about a decline in the quality of
Brin-L discussions over the last year and  half, until now we've never
really had a discussion about how to fix things.  We've generally agreed
that the list needs to be member-moderated as Dr. Brin wished, and that
the quality of discussion depends on the behavior of members.  But how to
get the best from ourselves, what strategy and tactics to use, is not a
question we've explored in any great detail.

Now is the time, and the Brin-L Constitution thread is a good place to start.
Also, as Buddhism teaches, regret and sorrow must be understood and then
abandoned in order to move forward.  In Christian terms, we should let Christ
bear our anger and regret and accept his grace in order to move forward.  In
more atheist and engineerish terms, why cry over spilled milk?  Let's clean
it up and move forward.  Again, the Brin-L Constitution thread is the
place to start.  We also have a suggestion on the table from Dan that
listowner and etiquette-police fuctions be distinctly and formally
separate, so there should be discussion about that.

And, before pulling the trigger on that devastatingly witty and logically
irrefutable post about somebody else's intentions, motivations, or
character, let's always remember to take some deep, deep breaths.

Marvin Long
Austin, Texas








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