Re AskMarilyn, Parade August 1st, 2004:
 
A question to her:
In what type of line are you when the last one in the line gets to go first.
 
Marilyn gave the answer of a train backing out of a station. "You're in a 
line of railroad cars at a terminal, where a train reaches the end of its journey 
and then leaves 'backward' to go in the other direction."
 
I do not think that she gave the best classical answer.
 
As to the train, the last person in may be the first person out, but I think 
he or she may not want to admit to the world that they missed their stop and 
now have to retrace their path and face the truth that they may get home late 
to a cold or reheated dinner, and to an even colder spouse.
 
No, the classic answer is this:
 
Being the last person in line of a not too efficient zeppelin ground crew.
 
The last person in line is going to be the last person to be lifted off of 
the ground. This of course verifies the fact that there exists a certain level 
of incompetence among the workers. But unlike the poor train commuter who only 
has his or her self to blame, the head of the ground crew is the one at fault, 
and he or she will usually be the first person in the line. If he or she 
wants to retain any sembalance of competency after this incident is over, they are 
going to hang on and be the last person to again tough ground.
 
The last person in line is going to be the first person to again touch 
ground. They may also be the driest person in line if the captain of the zeppelin 
decides to release some forward ballast just to teach those clowns on the ground 
a lesson. But that is neither here nor there as it relates to the original 
question.
 
The original question states that the last one in line gets to go first. Well 
that poor train commuter certainly doesn't get to go home first. But the last 
person holding onto the zeppelin line touches the ground first, and so he or 
she does get to go first. Obviously to go find more people to hold onto the 
line.
 
There are many many more blimps than there are zeppelins. But of couse the 
word zeppelin is much more funnier than the word blimp. If you disagree then you 
can go argue with Stan Freberg about the comic difference between Chicken 
with Stars and Chicken Gumbo. 
 
William Taylor
 

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