Dan Minette wrote:
> The general rule of civil discourse that I've always followed is that one
> signs off an argument by either not responding, or responding with a "lets
> table this message, I'm busy." It is not a parting shot. I realize that
> David is special here, this is certainly not the Minette-L list, but I'd
> just like the rules for debating with David clarified.
>
> 1) Are we not to differ with him?
>
> 2) Are we supposed to always let him have the last word, because he is the
> name member of the list?
>
> 3) Do we need to accept without question any derogatory tones he uses with
> people he differs with? I realize that some folks have taken exception
> with my tone from time to time, but I have always felt they had the right
> to their opinion. Yea...I'd differ with them, but I always thought about
> it.
>
> I'd appreciate any and all help in this manner. If the rules are clear to
> me, I will follow them as best I can. I will make mistakes in reading
> headers from time to time, and expect to get yelled at for any and all
> mistakes. The pleasure I have taken in corresponding with a large number
> of people I consider friends on this list outweighs the discomfort of
> having to follow special rules. It would just help very much to know what
> they were.
>
> Dan M.
You know what would really help? It would really help if there were a
rule observed, not just specially for the name member of the list, but
for *everyone*, not to assume knowing someone else's motivation for
saying whatever.
Any post containing something along the lines "Oh, you just think that
because X" to another poster could be heading down a path that will
probably end in a blowup if at least one of a certain set of people are
participating in that thread. (I cannot fully enumerate the set right
now, and I'm not sure it's wise to try, but I'm sure everyone who has
been participating here for a year or longer can easily come up with at
least two people in that set, and know when they're in a thread with
someone in that set....)
It's a form of disrespect, IMO, and the interpersonal problems around
here arise from one person disrespecting another for whatever reason.
If you can't reply to something in a manner that doesn't respect the
person whose words you're replying to, maybe you should think twice
about sending that response.
Just some thoughts that have been in the back of my head for some
time....
Julia
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