On Jul 8, 2010, at 6:03 AM, Jim Sharkey wrote:
On thing the article doesn't seem touch on, particularly in light of
how it indicates single parents are worse off, is how much children
can be a source of friction in their parents' relationship. It can
be hard to be on the same page vis a vis the rules and regulations
of your household at all times, and *that* can create some
unforeseen problems, IMO. For example, I wish I'd had a camera to
take a picture of my wife's face when my aforementioned eldest asked
if she could get her hair dyed purple and I said "I don't see why
not." I believe in picking my battles. :-)
The article addressed it, though maybe not in as much depth as other
aspects of the harder side of parenting:
This is the brutal reality about children—they’re such powerful
stressors that small perforations in relationships can turn into
deep fault lines. "And my wife became more demanding," he
continues. "'You don’t do this, you don’t do that.' There was
this idea we had about how things were supposed to be: The
family should be dot dot dot, the man should be dot dot dot the
woman should be dot dot dot."
The money quote of the whole article for me:
"They’re a huge source of joy, but they turn every other source
of joy to shit."
It's not so much that I agree with it, but it's so plainly put.
Dave
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