Hi,
Thank you for that story about you and your family on the breastfeeding matters.
Also thank you very much for the info and supportive words. I'm still trying hard to
keep with it and I know that it will be a constant battle. I really look forward to
the weekends so I can be with Shamus as much as possible and the night times durring
the week. I know that its only 8 hours a day and 40 a week. Its a lot of hours that I
am not with him when you put it all together, but I feed Shamus right before I leave
for work and as soon as I get him in my arms. So he has three to four bottles a day
without me. At least one to two of them is me and sometimes durring the evenings I
give a little bit of formula.
I am still working with the Whisper Wear Pump. I think it will take some time
before I totally give up on it. I have more problems with it when I sit down and try
and pump. I'm trying to get a comfortable feel for when I should have it on and not.
Its a little tough when you are on the go all day. Now we just got a new general store
manager and as if the last one was not bad enough this one puts the stress level right
thru the roof tops.
As for my mom, well I don't ever try to lock horns with her. It usually goes down
in the way of a conversation. For the most part she leaves it to just some very
polite, but still backhanded comments. I'll give you an example. My husband was
feeding Shamus a bottle of my milk. So he came downstairs and put Shamus in his swing
as he had fallen asleep. So the hubbie went to wash some bottles and do some dishes.
He had the baby right there, but my mom had come in and wanted to hold Shamus. She
does that a lot when the babies are sleeping. She is the type that has to play or
raise the volume in her conversation as to wake them up. I always liked the thinking
of let sleeping babies sleep. So as she picked him up he woke up and was still hungry,
so the hubbie gives her the bottle that still has some of my milk left in it. It was
less than an ounce left from four ounces. So he downs that and is still hungry, so the
hubbie makes him another bottle with two ounces of formula. So s
he keeps
feeding Shamus. Hubbie leaves to get me with the same bottle and the bottle still has
over an ounce in it. So she says that Shamus did better with the formula than with my
milk. My hubbie was not there when she said it. So I told him what she said. He said
she was out of her mind and didn't have a clue. My hubbie is all about total accuracy,
so when someone destorts the facts he is all over it. Anyway I don't conversate much
about how I am doing with each blow by blow accounting of my breastfeeding when it
comes to my mom because it will come to comments from her like why don't you just give
up and feed him formula. Oh well.
So as far as the old school thinking goes and being stuck in your way of thinking
I can understand all that, but when new well founded information is presented to you
does that make you think about it or just blow it off that it is wrong. Well that is
more the way it is with my mom. Well I'm not here to bash mom, just a lowdown on what
I'm running into as a mother.
Thanks again, Patty(Mommy to Joslyn & Shamus)
ML <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
I was fed solids at one week, my mom still has the chart what the dr. told her to feed
me! Just a thought on why your mom is the way she is, when things change, and as you
say she was not even too with child raising back then, and now things are different,
some people feel uncomfortable when things change or they did not do things the way
you do, it takes time for their opinions to change. I know when my first went threw
growth spurts, my mom would say, why don't you just give him a bottle, one bottle
would not hurt. I learned not to say anything neg (complain) about breastfeeding
around her. What surprised me is when my dad came to see the girls, I don't remember
if I ever nursed in front of him with the boys or not, but he seemed so natural with
it, even when I nursed at the restaurant (they were really little at the time) but I
still was surprised he would just hand me the hungry baby. Not sure now when he will
be here next month, nursing two 1 year olds what his opin
ion, or
my brothers, he has always been bothered by nursing babies in public, he worked at a
restaurtant for a while, although last time when he was here, they were about 6
months, he did not seem too bother. Might take me having lots of kids to break'em in.
ml
oh you might want to use reverse pyschology with your mom, find the smallest tiniest
thing that even comes close to agreeing with your breast feeding and thank her for her
support, she might come around
----- Original Message -----
From: Patty & Chaz
To: bfing
Sent: Friday, August 13, 2004 11:53 PM
Subject: [bfing] Re: whisper wear final thought
Tami,
Thank you. I'm still fighting the fight to breastfeed. My mom would really like to
see me fail. That is some extra motivation to succeed. My sister comes to her for all
kinds of answers and my mom really does not have a clue as to really knowing how to
care for a baby. She just winged it and my grandmother was the one who really raised
me my brother and sister and she was a serious alcoholic. So my mom thought that I
would be doing the same by running to her for answers. Well my husband and I have
spent a lot of time trying to research as much info as we could. We also choose to
consult those that we know that have a ggod number of children that we have good
parenting and just amazingly well rounded children. My nephew was not breastfed and I
feel so bad that his mom(my sister) did not care enough to even try. She was firm
about not doing it and would not listen to a thing on the subject of breastfeeding. It
is strange though because she winds up coming to me after going t
o my mom
for advice or to find out what I am doing that works so well depending on the
situation. So my sister and mother started feeding my nephew solid foods at one week
old. How does that strike you?
Patty(Moomy to Joslyn & Shamus)
Tami Spillman <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
Another thing that worked for me with DD now 3 1/2 was
to have a small blanket that she slept with... so it
smelled like her along with her picture and drinking
lots of mothers milk tea and water... we made it
through.... Just an idea... worked for us ;-)
Wishing you the best!
((HUGS))
Tami
--- Julie Michaelson wrote:
> Have you tried any of the herbal supplements said to
> increase milk supply? I know there are several
> things on the market. I have found that if I do not
> drink Mother's Milk tea my supply decreases. Most
> of the supplements are relatively inexpensive. I
> have noticed a drop here in the 8th month and I'm
> not really sure what to attribute it to. Brenden
> still nurses 6 times a day (even now that he is at
> daycare all day!) THe tea and drinking TONS of
> water has increased my supply a LOT! You might give
> that a try if you haven't already.
> 2oz is not bad at all! As we know, babies are more
> efficient at draining the breast than a pump. I
> don't know about you, but I have a really hard time
> relaxing when I pump and I just won't let down at
> all. Having pictures and breathing deep helped, but
> I think if you are having anxieties about your
> supply while you're pumping it's probably just
> stressing you out and in turn, not allowing you to
> "let down". Hang in there! You are doing a great
> job!!!
> Julie
>
> Patty & Chaz wrote:
> Well everyone the verdict is in! Whisper wear (for
> me) isn't a great thing to try. I am at the point
> where I have tried everthing in the world and I fell
> like I have failed. I am so upset. All I want is to
> give my Shamie the best start to life as possible,
> and it seems that I am not allowed to do so. My milk
> supply hasn't budged and the pump doesn't help me at
> all. I had in on at work all of the day Friday. It
> was off and on for 8 hours. I pumped only a sad 2
> ounces. My supply afterwards was the same pitiful
> 1-2 ounces. I have no other options, so it's either
> continue with hardly any milk and give him what I
> can or just give up and deal with the failure.
>
> ML wrote: Does her
> boyfriend(babies dad) live with her and their son?
> ml
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: Patty & Chaz
> To: bfing
> Sent: Friday, August 06, 2004 10:20 PM
> Subject: [bfing] Re: whisper wear help!
>
>
> Kelli,
> Thanks for what you had to say. I have done what
> I can to give him love whenever he is around. I
> think that his father is the best thing for him. You
> should see the way he lights up for his daddy. He
> does get love. My sister leaves him with my mom so
> thats a good thing. My husband always talks with him
> and is playful. My hubbie tried to pick him up twice
> and play with him. He cried awful. So my hubbie
> won't do that anymore. He even tried to show him
> that it was ok by picking up our daughter and doing
> the same thing with her. He just wasn't having it.
> Well my nephew is a cutie pie. He does get love from
> us. I can't have too much to do with my sister
> without wanting to ring her neck. She is just messed
> up all the way around and there is a lot of bad
> blood between the both of us. Every time that I hear
> that there is a problem with my nephew I want to
> give my sister a peice of my mind. She is always
> complainning about not having money. So I'm one of
> those type people that do all kinds
> of coupon shopping and check all the store ads and
> look for clearance. I do a lot of flea market
> shopping as well. My sister sees all the great stuff
> that our daughter and now our son have for the most
> part next to nothing and really really cheap. She is
> just in her own world and her son will continue to
> suffer.I've tried to talk with her she just won't
> listen for any reason. It will take my nephew
> getting hurt to the point that my mom will have to
> take custody till he is out of total harms way.
> Patty
>
> kelli randolph wrote:
> Patty, I couldn't help commenting on your nephew.
> If your sister will let you, see if you can take him
> for a few hours a week. He needs to bond with
> someone fast. If you can develop a realationship
> with him while he is still young he may have hope,
> otherwise, he will grow up angry and bitter with no
> sense of himself. The stories of how she left him
> laying there as a baby make me cry. I speak from
> experience and I am now 27 and finally learning how
> to love myself after the years of feeling like I was
> "on my own". I have mostly healed through having my
> own children. Forget you sister, take charge fast!
> Kelli, mamma to Becca 2/02 and Clay 3/04
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: Patty & Chaz
> To: bfing
> Sent: Thursday, August 05, 2004 7:22 PM
> Subject: [bfing] Re: whisper wear help!
>
>
> My sister is worse than that with her comments. Her
> son, my nephew fell somehow and cracked his skull.
> So then she was scrutenized by the hospital. So she
> says to me "what do they expect me to do watch him
> 24 7. She also badmouths her boyfriend to her son.
> Her boyfriend is the father of their child. He goes
> to feed the little guy and she yells at him for it.
> In the beginning she would just plop him down in a
> playpen and have a conversation in another room
> without coming in to check on him for a very long
> period of time. She put him in a highchair in my
> moms kitchen, the chair had no straps. She left him
> and don't you know just by me walking in to that
> room I cought him from falling out since he was
> standing up and trying to climb over the back. Well
> I guess you get the picture of the type person my
> sister is. She is what I consider to be a female
> that had a baby, but has no idea of how to be a mom.
> We have to have a license to drive a motorized
> vehicle, but not to have a baby and
> raise them.
>
> Patty
>
> Carla Colon wrote:
>
> Patty
> Sometimes we don't have family or friends we can
> leave are child with & are forced to use strangers
> though. I had to for my dd's first year until we
> decided to risk everything & I quit. I think most
> parents would like not to have to use daycare if
> they could. I'm sorry to hear that your sister says
> that hopefully not within earshot of her boy. I
> know people like that. Dh has a sister who says she
> "hates" kids & only likes hers because they are
> hers. That depends on how you define likes since
> they are the kind who believe in physical discipline
> to put it nicely. Dh & I can't begin to comprehend
> their way of thinking. I will never understand
> people who don't love kids heck I even want to hug &
> kiss those that aren't mine. Obviously I don't
> wouldn't want to freak out other parent's LOL but I
> find kids adorable & completely loveable.
> Carla
> mommy to Penelope 5-11-02
>
>
>
> >From: Patty & Chaz
> I agree, cause when it comes to your family
> especially with your little ones you can never be to
> concerned or to worried or to anything. If you have
> concerns them address them. Its a strange world with
> strange people in it. My hubbie and I won't trust
> the care of our children in anyones hands other than
> mine, his, hubbies mom and sister, and hubbies
> uncle, hubbies two cousins, and two close friends
> that are like family. There are a lot of family
> members that my babies are never to be left with.
> Some family members think its a right for them just
> because they are related. Well I don't feel the same
> way and neither does my husband. I just wish that
> the four of us could be together just about all the
> time.My sister has had her son in some really flim
> flam babysitters/daycares. She is ok with that. Then
> again she says at one point that "I never wanted him
> but I love him, I still don't want him but I loves
> him" > > Patty (Protector of Joslyn & Shamus). >
> >[EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote: >In a
> message dated 8/2/2004 3:17:29 PM Pacific Standard
> Time, [EMAIL PROTECTED] writes: >DH is going to
> pop in on him this afternoon. :-) Are we crazy? LOL!
> > > > >NO ..popping in is the smartest thing you can
> do in my opinion :D ... > >And listen to your gut.
> There are always other daycare providers or in home
> providers that will sling, cuddle and parent your
> way! >hugs, kim > > > >Kim - Natural Mama to Andy,
> Bailey and Molly >Associate Sales Team Coordinator
> For >UBB's Natural Family Boutique & Unique Baby
> Boutique >Slings and SO much more!
> >http://www.MyNaturalBoutique.com >Request a new
> Spring Catalog! >Save 10% with Coupon
> BreastfeedingBliss >MamaCare Postpartum Doula
> Services
> >http://home.comcast.net/~kimmzangels/MamaCare1.html
> > >If we hope to create a non-violent world where
> respect and kindness >replace fear and hatred, we
> must begin with how we treat each other >at the
> beginning of life. For that is where our deepest
> patterns are set. >From these roots grow fear and
> alienation - or love and trust. > ~ Suzanne Arms >
> > > > > > > > > > >--- >You are currently subscribed
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