\|/ \|/ \|/ \|/ \|/ \|/ \|/ \|/ \|/ \|/ \|/ \|/ \|/ \|/ \|/ \|/ MyFree.Com's Jokes, Jokes, Jokes Daily - August 26, 2004 Life's Short...Laugh Now! /|\ /|\ /|\ /|\ /|\ /|\ /|\ /|\ /|\ /|\ /|\ /|\ /|\ /|\ /|\ /|\
----------------------------SPONSOR----------------------------- How Is Martha Stewart Living? While Martha Stewart continues to fight her five-month prison stay, we are busy envisioning what it would be like for her in jail. Plus we have a great list of things she can do to keep her famous homemaking skills sharp. You'll love this funny list - and pass it along to share the smiles! <A href=" http://ed.myfree.com/r/r.php?src=mfp73 ">Click Here</a> ---------------------------------------------------------------- 1. SLOGAN OF THE DAY submitted by Brenda H. I tried sniffing coke once but the ice kept bumping my nose. Visit our new website to see if your slogan has been posted and while you're there check out our growing list of clever slogans and bumper stickers. Enjoy! <A href=" http://ed.myfree.com/r/r.php?src=myf392 ">Click Here</a> Do you have a favorite sticker or slogan you'd like to share? If so, please submit it to: <A href=" http://ed.myfree.com/r/r.php?src=myf469 ">Click Here</a>. Maybe you'll see YOUR favorite slogan or sticker on our website. Be sure to include your name, city, and state! 2. Actual Newspaper Headlines 1. Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says 2. Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers 3. Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted 4. Drunk Gets Nine Months in Violin Case 5. Survivor of Siamese Twins Joins Parents 6. Some Pieces of Rock Hudson Sold at Auction 7. Iraqi Head Seeks Arms 8. Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus? 9. Stud Tires Out 10. Prostitutes Appeal to Pope 11. Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over 12. Soviet Virgin Lands Short of Goal Again 13. British Left Waffles on Falkland Islands 14. Lung Cancer in Women Mushrooms 15. Eye Drops off Shelf 16. Teacher Strikes Idle Kids 17. Sex Education Delayed, Teachers Request Training 18. Squad Helps Dog Bite Victim 19. Shot Off Woman's Leg Helps Nicklaus to 66 20. Enraged Cow Injures Farmer with Ax 21. Plane Too Close to Ground, Crash Probe Told 22. Miners Refuse to Work after Death 23. Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant 24. Stolen Painting Found by Tree 25. Two Soviet Ships Collide, One Dies 26. Two Sisters Reunited after 18 Years in Checkout Counter 27. Killer Sentenced to Die for Second Time in 10 Years 28. Include your Children when Baking Cookies 29. Drunken Drivers Paid $1000 in `84 30. War Dims Hope for Peace 31. If Strike isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last a While 32. Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures 33. Enfields Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide 34. Red Tape Holds Up New Bridge 35. Deer Kill 17,000 36. Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead 37. Man Struck by Lightning Faces Battery Charge 38. New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group 39. Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft 40. Kids Make Nutritious Snacks 41. Chef Throws His Heart into Helping Feed Needy 42. Arson Suspect is Held in Massachusetts Fire 43. British Union Finds Dwarfs in Short Supply 44. Ban On Soliciting Dead in Trotwood 45. Lansing Residents Can Drop Off Trees 46. Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half 47. New Vaccine May Contain Rabies 48. Man Minus Ear Waives Hearing 49. Deaf College Opens Doors to Hearing 50. Air Head Fired 51. Steals Clock, Faces Time 52. Prosecutor Releases Probe into Undersheriff 53. Old School Pillars are Replaced by Alumn 54. Bank Drive-in Window Blocked by Board 55. Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors ----------------------------SPONSOR----------------------------- Win Fun For The Whole Family Enter today to win 4 FREE Theme Park Tickets to the park of your choice! Choose from: => Disneyworld => Disneyland => Six Flags => Busch Gardens => Knott's Berry Farm => Cedar Point => King's Island => Plus Many More! Click here to enter now: <A href=" http://ed.myfree.com/r/r.php?src=myf821 ">Click Here</a> ---------------------------------------------------------------- SUBMIT A JOKE! The great MyFree.com joke hunt is going on right now! If you'd like to see YOUR favorite joke in print, click the link below: <A href=" http://ed.myfree.com/r/r.php?src=myf462 ">Click Here</a> Be sure to include your name, city, and state! Live, Love, Laugh, Susan Derby Editor : : : : : : : : : : EDITOR'S NOTE : : : : : : : : : : Make sure our e-mails get to your inbox -- just add Joke [EMAIL PROTECTED] to your address book! : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : * * * . . . . . . 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