(I think I've just started a book.)

>>>What do you want to use it for? How often will you use it? Have you a
mooring for it? Do you know how much it will cost you a year to maintain and
keep on the waterways?

I once worked on a squillionairre's motor-yacht in the Med. My boss told me
on my first day, as I started to clean thousands of square meters of
un-lacquered brass, "there's crew you'll meet on these boats that'll have
the answer to absolutely everything boating; they're called yachting-brains.
They know the weight of fuel by the metric ton, they can convert miles per
hour into knots and tie a granny up blindfolded. Don't go there - we're all
in the same boat Son". I didn't have a clue what he was on about.

Months later, I knew at what displacement a ship needed to be before you
ordered your fuel by the ton, not gallons (we didn't have litres when I was
young!). I knew a left handed bosun's knot as well as a right-handed one. I
could call up Portishead radio on the HF set using the phonetic alphabet and
wink at the harbour master's daughter in St Tropez without him seeing me.
Looking back, the more I understood, the less I knew.

>>>When you have answered the questions you will know what you want

No I won't! :)

For what it's worth, it was a shiny magazine editor who dissuaded me against
a 70 foot boat (dissuaded or persuaded?). I have been seeking to clear up
his answer for a long time since. Perhaps he was only reflecting upon his
strong opinion. It's had me worried though. I had visions of someone saying,
"Oh my gawd Callum, don't break the 68 foot barrier without factoring in the
curvature of the earth!", after all this is a pretty esoteric way of life.

We visited another builder today. I hawk around a fine Autocad drawing
showing my visions of our family narrowboat to millimetre accuracy in three
dimensions, possibly more but we don't have a time machine. Actually, I've
converted everything to feet and inches. Narrowboat builders are one of the
few trades to continue building in feet and inches, probably due to our 6
foot 10 inch future, or 7 foot past. They glance at the drawing then at me,
then down at the drawing again, "You've built narrowboats before"? I shrug
my shoulders. I wish I had sketched the damned thing out on a fag packet
now. I read their thoughts. I pick out some words. "Bloody", "Smart" and
"Arse" comes to mind. It takes a while but we do get there after I spend 5
minutes nodding, smiling and grunting keenly at the difference between 16
inch and 18 inch portholes.

I'm on version 4.40 currently. I started with the galley at the stern and
the saloon at the bow and the base plate underwater. The first builder told
me that this was going to put the price up considerably due to the amount of
copper pipe from the gas locker to the hob. I knew copped had gone through
the roof but I had no idea it had overtaken the gold index.

I couldn't sleep tonight thinking of Helen. Last week I called BW and spoke
to a girl who runs the mooring waiting lists. Actually, she's been promoted
now and told me that she runs all the little men who hand out licence
infringement notices. She was very angry that there were too many boats and
not enough moorings. She said that she was recommending a mooring auction
site to her bosses so that the highest bidder would secure their favourite
mooring. She laughed hysterically to my, "So it won't be free then"? Anyway,
she told me not to bother putting my name down on any waiting list. Nobody
looks at them anymore, they're completely unmanageable.

I wrote to my MP asking what she was doing to bring this BW funding business
to the government's attention. She wrote back and told me I was right. Don't
be silly, the last time I was right was when I converted 120 metric tonnes
of fuel to litres, at sea level and then I was wrong anyway and diesel
spurted all over the teak deck at 588 litres per minute. It was a bad hair
day.

So, where am I going to moor my boat? During the winter, Helen told me she
could find me a winter mooring at Knowle Locks for Dutch Oven - no problem,
but she'd have to throw me out on 1st April and it wasn't a joke. Well,
that's OK, we'll just cruise about for 6 months until I find a kind farmer
who backs onto the canal. Alternatively, get me a Vodafone connection and a
laptop and I'll run the world. Well, my world. I'll do that until an
interesting and worthwhile mooring comes up for sale for the same price as a
70 foot 1 inch diameter copper pipe.

Anyway, I'm sticking at 70 foot. Thanks!

Callum
No nb (yet) and if I get my way, which is rare in this house, we won't be
calling it Dutch Oven. They'll all laugh at me.

 
-----Original Message-----
From: Sue Burchett [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] 
Sent: 27 March 2007 09:53
To: [email protected]
Subject: FW: [canals-list] 70 foot narrow boat..? Help me think please..


> 
Bounced again so sending this again. Sue
>
>We're seeing boat builders this week regarding the potential of a 70 foot
>narrowboat (maybe a whisker less) for our family (Mum & Dad + 7 year old
boy
>and 11 year old girl). Clearly, there's some canals we can't cruise (I
>forget which ones - mostly up North I'm told) but we don't mind that - it's
>the pleasure of the larger boat we want and that we're led to believe in
the
>Midlands and South, 70 feet will be OK. We live about a mile from Knowle
>locks and have canals all around us.
>
> 
>
>Will a 70 footer really be OK for Midlandss and Southern cruising - or are
>we a bit daft considering this size? Someone told us that the only people
to
>have 70 footers are live-aboards. Is this right?
>
> 
>
>Callum.

Have you hired a 70' boat and tried one out?
What do you want to use it for? How often will you use it? Have you a
mooring for it? Do you know how much it will cost you a year to maintain and
keep on the waterways?
When you have answered the questions you will know what you want.

There are some locks that are narrow. Remember it is a 200 year old system
and things move. Is getting your pride and joy worth getting stuck?
Sue nb Nackered Navvy 



 
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