The way things are going, pretty soon Russia will have more freedoms than we have.
Chuck WB2EDV Peter Albright wrote: >It really doesn't sound so bad, does it? Must be the Brits have mellowed >over the last 3 centuries. > >Peter > >-----Original Message----- > > > > ------------------------------------------------------------------------ > > Subject: > Re: [CARC] Brits to take over USA..again. > To: > [email protected] > > To: > [email protected] > > >I'm just about ready ;-) > >Chuck >WB2EDV > > > > >Andrew O'Brien wrote: > > > >>---------------------------------------- >>To the Citizens of the States of America: >> >>We hereby give notice of the Revocation of Your >>Independence, effective immediately. Her Sovereign Majesty Queen >>Elizabeth >>II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths, and >>territories excepting Kansas, which she does not fancy. Your new prime >>minister, Tony Blair, will appoint a governor for America without the >>need >>for further elections. Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A >>questionnaire may be circulated next year to determine whether any of you >>noticed. >> >>To aid in the transition to a British Crown Dependency, the following >>rules are introduced with immediate effect: (You should look up >>"revocation" in the Oxford English Dictionary.) >> >>1. Look up aluminium, and check the pronunciation guide. You will be >>amazed at just how wrongly you have been pronouncing it. >> >>2. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'favour' and >>'neighbour.' Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping >>half the letters and the suffix "ize" will be replaced by the suffix >>"ise". >>Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to acceptable >>levels. (look up "vocabulary"). >> >>3. Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such >>as "like" and "you know" is an unacceptable and inefficient form of >>communication. There is no such thing as US English. We will let Microsoft >>know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take >>account of the reinstated letter 'u' and the elimination of -ize. >> >>4. July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday. >> >>5. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers, >>or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists >>shows >>that you're not adult enough to be independent. Guns should only be >>handled by adults. If you're not adult enough to sort things out without >>suing someone or speaking to a therapist then you're not grown up enough >>to handle a gun. >> >>6. Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more >>dangerous than a vegetable peeler. A permit will be required if you wish >>to carry a vegetable peeler in public. >> >>7. All intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start >>driving on the left with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go >>metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion >>tables. >>Both roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British >>sense of humour. >> >>8. The former USA will adopt UK prices on petrol (which you have been >>calling gasoline) -roughly $6/US gallon. Get used to it. >> >>9. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French Fries >>are not real chips, and those things you insist on calling potato chips >>are properly called crisps. Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal >>fat, >>and dressed not with catsup but with vinegar. >> >>10. The cold tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually >>beer at all. Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to as >>beer, and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be >>referred >>to as Lager. American brands will be referred to as Near-Frozen Gnat's >>Urine, so that all can be sold without risk of further confusion. >> >>11. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as >>good >>guys. Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to play >>English characters. Watching Andie MacDowell attempt English dialogue in >>Four Weddings and a Funeral was an experience akin to having one's ears >>removed with a cheese grater. >> >>12. You will cease playing American football. There is only one kind of >>proper football; you call it soccer. Those of you brave enough will, in >>time, be allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American >>football, but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or >>wearing full Kevlar body armour like a bunch of nancies). >> >>13. Further, you will stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host >>an event called the World Series for a game which is not played outside of >>America. Since only 21% of you are aware that there is a world beyond your >>borders, your error is understandable. >> >>14. You must tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us mad. >> >>15. An Inland Revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty's >>Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all >>monies due (backdated to 1776). >> >>16. Daily tea time begins promptly at 4 PM with proper cups - never mugs, >>with high quality biscuits (cookies) and cakes; strawberries in season. >> >>Thank you for your co-operation. >> >> >> >>-- >>Andy k3UK >> >>K3UK DX Cluster via telnet://cluster.dnyalias.org >> >>Other K3UK-CARC Groups >>DIGITALRADIO Group http://groups.yahoo.com/group/digitalradio/ >>MixW Group http://groups.yahoo.com/group/themixwgroup/ >> >>Unsubscribe this group via [EMAIL PROTECTED] >> >> >> >> >> >> >>SPONSORED LINKS >>Craft hobby >> >> >> ><http://groups.yahoo.com/gads?t=ms&k=Craft+hobby&w1=Craft+hobby&w2=Hobby+and >+craft+supply&w3=Ham+radio&c=3&s=60&.sig=YqiuyVwjnQFdynnsmMwVWg> > > >> Hobby and craft supply >> >> >> ><http://groups.yahoo.com/gads?t=ms&k=Hobby+and+craft+supply&w1=Craft+hobby&w >2=Hobby+and+craft+supply&w3=Ham+radio&c=3&s=60&.sig=VduRJqNqUo9QkUiTI-knAA> > > >> Ham radio >> >> >> ><http://groups.yahoo.com/gads?t=ms&k=Ham+radio&w1=Craft+hobby&w2=Hobby+and+c >raft+supply&w3=Ham+radio&c=3&s=60&.sig=sl_TRqZTiP_WHSLe6P3ybA> > > >> >>------------------------------------------------------------------------ >>YAHOO! GROUPS LINKS >> >> * Visit your group "carcomm >> <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/carcomm>" on the web. >> >> * To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to: >> [EMAIL PROTECTED] >> <mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]> >> >> * Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo! Terms of >> Service <http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/>. >> >> >>------------------------------------------------------------------------ >> >> >> > > > >K3UK DX Cluster via telnet://cluster.dnyalias.org > >Other K3UK-CARC Groups >DIGITALRADIO Group http://groups.yahoo.com/group/digitalradio/ >MixW Group http://groups.yahoo.com/group/themixwgroup/ > >Unsubscribe this group via [EMAIL PROTECTED] > > > >Yahoo! Groups Links > > > > > > > > > > > >K3UK DX Cluster via telnet://cluster.dnyalias.org > >Other K3UK-CARC Groups >DIGITALRADIO Group http://groups.yahoo.com/group/digitalradio/ >MixW Group http://groups.yahoo.com/group/themixwgroup/ > >Unsubscribe this group via [EMAIL PROTECTED] > > > >Yahoo! Groups Links > > > > > > > K3UK DX Cluster via telnet://cluster.dnyalias.org Other K3UK-CARC Groups DIGITALRADIO Group http://groups.yahoo.com/group/digitalradio/ MixW Group http://groups.yahoo.com/group/themixwgroup/ Unsubscribe this group via [EMAIL PROTECTED] Yahoo! Groups Links <*> To visit your group on the web, go to: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/carcomm/ <*> To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to: [EMAIL PROTECTED] <*> Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to: http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/
