> ARKANSAS CITY (EAP) -- A Little Rock woman was killed yesterday after
leaping
> through her moving car's sunroof during an incident best described as "a
> mistaken rapture" by dozens of eyewitnesses.
If I saw some nut jumping out of a moving vehicle, I think I would have
another phrase to describe it other than "a mistaken rapture".
> Thirteen other people were injured after a twenty-car pile up resulted
from
> people trying to avoid hitting the woman who was apparently convinced that
> the rapture was occurring when she saw twelve people floating up into the
> air, and then passed a man on the side of the road who she claimed was
Jesus.
Avoid hitting her? I think I would aim for her to make sure she and her
husband never got a chance to reproduce.
> "She started screaming "He's back, He's back" and climbed right out of the
> sunroof and jumped off the roof of the car," said Everet Williams, husband
of
> 28-year-old Georgann Williams who was pronounced dead at the scene.
How long were they married again? You would think this guy would take the
time to know about any mental illness issues before legally binding himself
to another person.
> "I was slowing down but she wouldn't wait till I stopped," Williams said.
She
> thought the rapture was happening and was convinced that Jesus was going
lift
> her up into the sky," he went on to say.
OK .. one observation .... If my wife started screaming "he's back" and
stood up in her seat, I'm pretty dang sure I could stop the car out of sheer
panic before she could manage to fling herself out of a sunroof! Think
about how hard it would be to climb through a sunroof .. especially if you
freaked out the driver and they started changing speed/direction rapidly ...
anyone?
> "This is the strangest thing I've seen since I've been on the force," said
> Paul Madison, first officer on the scene.
Except that time he broke into that LSD stash in the evidence locker during
that one slow week in February that time.
> Madison questioned the man who looked like Jesus and discovered that he
was
> dressed up as Jesus and was on his way to a toga costume party when the
tarp
> covering the bed of his pickup truck came loose and released twelve blow
up
> sex dolls filled with helium which floated up into the air.
Anyone know if enough helium could really be pumped into a blow-up doll to
make it float? If you know the answer to this question, perhaps it's just
best if you didn't answer after all.
> Ernie Jenkins, 32, of Fort Smith, who's been told by several of his
friends
> that he looks like Jesus, pulled over and lifted his arms into the air in
> frustration, and said "Come back here," just as the Williams' car passed
him,
> and Mrs. Williams was sure that it was Jesus lifting people up into the
sky
> as they passed by him, according to her husband, who says his wife loved
> Jesus more than anything else.
Apparently, she loved blow-up dolls more than anything else .. that, or she
was secretly praying for divine intervention to get away from her husband.
Either way, it doesn't seem to say much for him.
> When asked for comments about the twelve sex dolls, Jenkins replied "This
is
> all just too weird for me. I never expected anything like this to happen."
Jenkins later confessed that he was happy to see "the crazy bitch go" rather
than to have to eventually pay alimony that would, no doubt, be spent on his
ex's blow-up pool-boys.
OK .. this is just a plain silly story, but it does make a strong argument
supporting the dangers of inbreeding ...
Todd
-----
If I had a nickel for every crazed woman that I saw jumping through the
sunroof of a moving vehicle ...... Praise the Lord!!
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