Yes, an outline is exactly what I had in mind. Just a corner of the apartment building would bring more weight to the side and make it feel balanced, in addition to making the whole page feel more targeted at the apartment rental. Matthew Small Web Developer American City Business Journals 704-973-1045 [EMAIL PROTECTED]
-----Original Message----- From: Tony Weeg [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] Sent: Wednesday, August 10, 2005 10:10 AM To: CF-Community Subject: Re: interface critique i played with that last night... and bringing a REAL world object into the design kinda took away from the "light airy feel" maybe a pencil sketch of one? tw On 8/10/05, Matthew Small <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > I'd like to see an attractive apartment building in the area to the right of > the tree. The building should be only partially visible. > > Matthew Small > > > > -----Original Message----- > From: Tony Weeg [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] > Sent: Wednesday, August 10, 2005 9:53 AM > To: CF-Community > Subject: Re: interface critique > > WOW! > > great critique. exactly what anyone who is a designer wants to hear. > > good intelligent critiqueing! > > thank you kevin. > > more iterations coming tonight :) ill send up another version this evening. > > not that anyone will be holding their breath, but in case you can look, > thanks! > > tw > > On 8/10/05, Kevin Graeme <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > > Well the description of "Flash site" was less to describe the tech > > than to describe the light on useful presentation and high on abstract > > aesthetic. It just doesn't feel like the site is trying to sell me on > > apartments. Sorry. > > > > If you do keep the design concept, there are some things that could > > use help. The size of the content block (under the tree area) doesn't > > match the contents. Whitespace is good, but all the space under the > > text and buttons and none on top makes them feel crammed to the > > top.The large margin between the text and buttons makes the margins of > > the text and left edge and buttons and right edge feel cramped. And > > then the space between the two buttons is yet another unmatched, > > arbitrary space. They don't all need to be pixel perfect matches, they > > just need to complement each other and they don't right now. > > > > I think the rounded corner box around the descriptive text is too > > much. It becomes effect for the veneer of design instead of something > > that enhances the design. I think you would be better served dropping > > the extra box around the description, filling the area with more text > > to fill the space and give the text more leading to make it breathe. > > If you do that, I would bring the left side in more giving it more > > margin there instead of extending the right side to fill that gap. > > > > I'd also like to see a bit more distinction between the header/accent > > text and the body text. The "Welcome to..." text doesn't pop. I really > > like the handling of the button text though. The large text with tight > > kerning of the name with the all lowercase, tracked out "apartments" > > in the green is really nice. The bottom bar of contact info is pretty > > good too. I like the "contact davis realty" being a focal point but > > the inconsistent handling of the other text just makes me a little > > squirmy. I think the wide tracked url and the really tight "for > > information" provide too much contrast. And since numbers always go to > > the cap height and most of your text is x-height, the numbers feel > > heavier than the rest even though they look like they're technically > > the same size. I'd also consider making the "click below for more > > information" a light color, weight, smaller or something. It's not > > content text but it attracts the eye too much right now, distracting > > from the important parts. > > > > Those are all fine-tweaking details though. They aren't major issues, > > just finesse. What I get hung up on is the overall floaty-ness of it. > > The clouds are beautiful and I really like the way they blend into the > > white background with the blue trapped in the middle creating an > > interesting figure-ground relationship and setting the body to have a > > margin/padding of 0 to lose the top white margin enhances that. But > > the content bar at the bottom feels just...incomplete. It's floating > > there in space. Here, the white background is working against the > > design and on larger monitors that problem is more pronounced. I know > > this is an isolated jpg though, so there may be something you intend > > that isn't coming across here. If you ARE trying to have it actually > > have the feel of land floating in mid-air then I would have the design > > of the content box reflect that instead of being a simple rectangle. > > > > I also notice that on an 800x600 display, there is no content other > > than the clouds, tree and a sliver of "ground". The rest is "below the > > fold". I know there aren't many 8x6 displays out there anymore, but > > the way the content fits makes it seem almost intentional. It's > > actually a really neat effect if this was a portfolio site. But for > > what appears to be a brochure site, not having the name above the fold > > is probably not a good idea. > > > > Don't take these comments as a blistering critique or anything. You're > > taking some risks with the design and that's cool to see (it's > > certainly been a while since I've done so.) I'm just not sure the > > approach sells apartments. I'm by no means saying you need to go back > > to the drawing board. I think you could iterate the design a bit more > > and see if it comes together. > > > > Cheers and good luck! > > > > -Kevin > > > > On 8/9/05, Tony Weeg <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > > > interesting... and i concur. (wasnt my aim... maybe looking > > > at all those flash 8 sites has me in a flash state of mind) > > > > > > is that a negative thing? i dont know? > > > > > > remember 99% of the clients are not tech heads so im not sure that > > > correlation would be present? > > > > > > thank you :) > > > tony > > > > > > > > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~| Find out how CFTicket can increase your company's customer support efficiency by 100% http://www.houseoffusion.com/banners/view.cfm?bannerid=49 Message: http://www.houseoffusion.com/lists.cfm/link=i:5:168774 Archives: http://www.houseoffusion.com/cf_lists/threads.cfm/5 Subscription: http://www.houseoffusion.com/lists.cfm/link=s:5 Unsubscribe: http://www.houseoffusion.com/cf_lists/unsubscribe.cfm?user=89.70.5 Donations & Support: http://www.houseoffusion.com/tiny.cfm/54
