http://www.nationalpost.com/home/story.html?f=/stories/20011220/921780.html
The winner goes like this: Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping and
pitch their tent under the stars. During the night, Holmes wakes Watson and
says: "Watson, look up at the stars and tell me what you deduce."
Watson says: "I see millions of stars, and even if a few of those have
planets, it's quite likely there are some planets like Earth, and if there
are a few planets like Earth out there, there might also be life."
Holmes replies: "Watson, you idiot. Somebody stole our tent."
Here's the joke that came in second: A couple of hunters are out in the
woods when one of them falls to the
ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes
are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his
mobile phone and calls 911. "My friend is dead! What
can I do?" he says. The operator, in a calm, soothing
voice, says, "Just take it easy. First, let's make
sure he's dead." There's silence, then a shot is heard. The guy
comes back on the line and says, "OK, now what?"
I liked this one. :)
While robbing a home, a burglar hears someone say, "Jesus is watching you."
To his relief, he realizes it is only
a parrot mimicking something it has heard. The burglar
asks the parrot, "What's your name?" The parrot says,
"Moses." The burglar says: "What kind of person names
their parrot Moses?" The parrot replies: "The same kind
of person that names his Rottweiler Jesus."
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