I think the worst part of all of this, is that I am a man that likes to think of him self as strong and self sufficient, and this is making me feel weak and useless.
-- Timothy Heald Analyst, Architect, Developer [EMAIL PROTECTED] W: 202-228-8372 C: 703-300-3911 -----Original Message----- From: Loathe [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] Sent: Thursday, March 30, 2006 10:53 AM To: CF-Community Subject: RE: Veterans Affairs Sounds like the fucking Army. Fuck it, if I can do Airborne school with my foot broken, I can do this shit. I'm not going to lie though, today ha been the worst so far. Muscle contractions, shivers, crying jags, weird pains. Fuck Paxil, I'll never take another SSRI in my life. -- Timothy Heald Analyst, Architect, Developer [EMAIL PROTECTED] W: 202-228-8372 C: 703-300-3911 -----Original Message----- From: Wayne Putterill [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] Sent: Thursday, March 30, 2006 10:46 AM To: CF-Community Subject: Re: Veterans Affairs Just remember that it gets better, it's like when your out on your feet after carrrying a load for hours and the thing that keeps you going is knowing that there will be an end to it. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other and you will get there. On 3/30/06, Loathe <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > > I can't get anymore. > > I have made my job aware of what's going on, and they are being very > supportive, as is my wife, now that she realizes just how seriously > fucked up I am. > > I mean, I have had bad dreams and shit for years, but like to days ago > I woke up bawling uncontrollably. Moved into the shower, and it > lasted over an hour. It was pretty fucked up. > > I can't wait until this shit is over. > > -- > Timothy Heald > Analyst, Architect, Developer > [EMAIL PROTECTED] > W: 202-228-8372 > C: 703-300-3911 > -----Original Message----- > From: Wayne Putterill [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] > Sent: Thursday, March 30, 2006 10:20 AM > To: CF-Community > Subject: Re: Veterans Affairs > > I know we have had our moments but honestly I feel for you on this > one, Paxil is a swine to come off cold turkey as I know from personal > experience. > Good luck with it but get someone to look out for you, your head can > really get screwed up coming off that stuff and you don't want to wake > up one day realising you have done something you would not normally > imagine you could. > Seriously, people have ended up dead due to this drug, it messes with > your brain big time and it takes a fair while to recover. > > If you can get some more and work out a gradual withdrawal plan you > will be far better off, it should only take a few weeks to do and at > the end you will be on .25 of a tab every other day so you wont need > that much. > > On 3/30/06, Loathe <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > > > > Ok, you guys know me. I am not a person that normally likes > > government programs. > > > > However I have always thought that veterans (war vets, not guys that > > serve in peace time) should be well taken car of, and I feel that > > this administration has really dropped the ball with my generation > > of > warriors. > > > > Just to give you guys the back story. > > > > I have PTSD pretty bad. Not the dive on the ground at car back > > fires kind (actually bangs don't bother me at all, whistles from > > fire works and shit really get me bad), rather the nightmares no > > sleep reality and anger issues type. > > > > Now, I've been on Paxil for about a year, and it really did help a > > lot. I ran out last Thursday. > > > > I do consulting right no, money is great, but no benefits, you know > > like medical. We are, and have been, waiting for BC/BS to get > > around to either approving or denying our application, and my > > transitional assistance medical care from the military ended back in > > December. The VA is available to me, however, I make too much > > money. They have a sliding scale, and I would have to pay 100%. > > > > So essentially I am now doing the cold turkey Paxil withdrawal thing. > > It sucks, baaaaaad. Not as bad as the shit on the web would have > > you think. I mean, I'm not dying or anything. I get shocks through > > my whole body like crazy. I yell, a lot, and for me to say I yell a > > lot, that's bad. I am almost always shivering. Not from cold, just > > shivering. I am insulting , more than normal, a lot more than normal. > > > > I figured, I would suck it up until the new insurance kicked in. > > The wife had other plans. She calls the VA yesterday, and they > > treat her like gold on the phone, make out lie I'm something they > > are really concerned about, and say they will have someone contact > > me within the > hour. > > > > Still no call. > > > > Last time I went in to a VA hospital I had broken my foot, this is > > years ago, pre 9/11, took my 6 hours to be seen. At the time I was > > making 20K a year. I still had to pay for the visit and the meds , > > oh and BTW yes, I was a combat vet prior to Afghanistan. > > > > Anyway, I'm not so worried about myself, I can manage. I'm > > concerned about the wounded, the guys with real mental health > > problems, and the guys that can't just "deal". WTF are we doing for > > them, I am sick to my stomach to hear about Bushie trying to cut VA > > benefits, and talk about invading Iran almost in the same breath, > > who the fuck does he think do the invading, it sure as shit isn't > > the Air Force. > > > > Sorry, I know long rant, just something I am thinking about, opinions? > > > > -- > > Timothy Heald > > Analyst, Architect, Developer > > [EMAIL PROTECTED] > > W: 202-228-8372 > > C: 703-300-3911 > > > > > > > > > > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~| Message: http://www.houseoffusion.com/lists.cfm/link=i:5:202286 Archives: http://www.houseoffusion.com/cf_lists/threads.cfm/5 Subscription: http://www.houseoffusion.com/lists.cfm/link=s:5 Unsubscribe: http://www.houseoffusion.com/cf_lists/unsubscribe.cfm?user=89.70.5 Donations & Support: http://www.houseoffusion.com/tiny.cfm/54
