> Ever stop and think that this pliable, non-objective view
> you seem to have might be at least partially responsible
> for all the drama and problems you seem to attract.

Yep, thought about it, examined it, and rejected it.

I have firm opinions about things. I as an individual, although I
change my mind about things from time to time, do form complete
opinions. Just look back over my contributions to various threads on
the HoF lists. Even in this thread, my opinion on this subject is firm
because it's my opinion, because I've considered the evidence that's
available to me and I've decided where I stand on the issue, which is
entirely different from being "on the fence" or "wishy washy" about
the subject.

Could certain of my opinions be partly responsible for problems I've
had in the past or possibly continue to have now? Yes. For one thing,
Tiff and I put up a friend in our apartment recently with the hopes
that she'd changed since our last experience with her several years
ago. She's gone now, and we know beyond the shadow of a doubt that
she's not changed. She even got a second chance -- the gov't let her
change her name and get a new SSN under the belief that a former
spouse was stalking her (at least that's the story), and we hoped
maybe when she got her second chance that she'd have wised up and
realized that she should probably take that opportunity to change the
habbits that lead her to being in a bad way. Since she left, we
discovered three separate "pay day loan" documents for loans we know
she doesn't plan to pay back, letters about bounced checks, she owes a
couple hundred dollars to a boyfriend she picked up in the couple
months she was here, etc. When she came my stipulations were a) we're
not paying for her transportation b) we're not paying for her animals
and c) she'll contribute to food. All three of those conditions were
met, and I will never let her stay with me again. Although it sucked
it was not as dreadful as it had been the last time because I changed
in interst of my own self-preservation. I continue to change, as I'm
not likely to give anyone else the 2nd chance I gave her. So I do
learn from my mistakes.

At the same time I seem to have more random-chance negative events
occur in my life as compared to the average person. Things that are at
best marginally within my control. It can't be quantified, I just know
that most of my friends don't seem to have as many left-field events.
If I go to buy a car for example, and someone else does the same
thing, we both go through the same selection process, get the same
make and model car, with the same mileage, from the same dealership,
historical analysis will show that my car will have twice as many
mechanical failures, given the same amount of maintenance. So I change
what I can, accept what I can't, and do my damnedest to distinguish
between them. A person just can't see everything coming.

> I mean, I know the causes of most of my problems, me.
> I'm doing something about that.

Same here.


s. isaac dealey     434.293.6201
new epoch : isn't it time for a change?

add features without fixtures with
the onTap open source framework

http://www.fusiontap.com
http://coldfusion.sys-con.com/author/4806Dealey.htm


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