Paul, Didn't your vet give you a pair of claw nippers?
Those little scissor-looking things with only about a quarter inch of blade past the pivot, with a sharp concave indent in the blade? They come right off with almost no effort at all because of the massive leverage and the razor sharp cutting surface (the indent). Saved our arms many a time. I first learned of this as a young child, when my mother told me "Go to the vet and get some claw nippers." So I went to the vet I knew and he told me what I really needed was a genuine K-Bar Fighting Knife and some camo face paint. So I bought them and took them home to my mother and she's like, "Not a goddamned Vietnam vet, shithead, a veterinarian!" So I'm all embarrassed and ashamed, and I go to the veterinarian, and it turns out he's a Vietnam vet, too. And as luck would have it, his assistant is the other Vietnam vet I got the knife and camo paint from. So I told them what my mom said and we all laughed about it real hard and then sat in the dark with a red filter military flashlight making plans to kill her. We agreed that I would distract her with the claw nippers (that I finally got from him) while Doc came up behind her with a string garrote and a K-Bar. "Why the string garrote, Doc?" I asked him. "We want this quiet-like. Close off her throat. Bleed her slow," he explained. "Oh." Then it dawned on me, so I asked him: "Why are we killing my mother?" "She's Charlie, son," he said. I was only seven, so I didn't really understand. Anyway, long story short, he chokes her with the string garrote and I have a change of heart, so I use the claw nippers to snip the garrote and free my mom. Doc stands there, K-Bar in hand, looking at me with death in his eyes. "You...!" he hisses before he charges. So I side-step his thrust and hook him on his right ear with the claw nippers, spinning him around like a whirling dervish. I pick up my Tonka truck and smash him on the bridge of his nose again and again until it sinks into a bloody hole in his skull. He falls to the kitchen floor, and I'm on him like a duck on a junebug, pummeling his throat until he can't breathe. Just before he dies, I use his K-Bar to take my well-deserved trophy: his right ear; the one I hooked with the claw nippers. That day I learned about the importance of claw nippers. Learned how they can save you from heartache and a whole lot of pain. Learned about the men behind that pain. Learned about life. And Fluffy didn't scratch me later that night when I gave her a flea dip. So get yourself a pair of claw nippers, Paul. I did. Respectfully, Adam Phillip Churvis Get advanced intensive Master-level training in C# & ASP.NET 2.0 for ColdFusion Developers at ProductivityEnhancement.com -----Original Message----- From: Paul Ihrig [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] Sent: Wednesday, August 08, 2007 2:46 PM To: CF-Community Subject: damb cat.. bath time.. just gave my damb cat a bath every 3 years or so. now have puncher wounds on my arm... look like a heroin addict.. man.. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~| ColdFusion is delivering applications solutions at at top companies around the world in government. Find out how and where now http://www.adobe.com/cfusion/showcase/index.cfm?event=finder&productID=1522&loc=en_us Archive: http://www.houseoffusion.com/groups/CF-Community/message.cfm/messageid:239732 Subscription: http://www.houseoffusion.com/groups/CF-Community/subscribe.cfm Unsubscribe: http://www.houseoffusion.com/cf_lists/unsubscribe.cfm?user=89.70.5
