As adults, we should not be into "gift-swapping" simply because corporate 
marketing has sold the world on this idea.  Last year, I told my five 
married brothers that I would no longer be buying gifts for them or their 
wives, and I expected nothing in return. I told them that I would buy a 
small gift for their child, that's it.  Any gifts I get from them would 
remain unopened. Of course, one of them said "well, if you just get a small 
gift that costs $10..."  Well, I don't want a gift that costs $10, and I 
don't want to give any either. I have too much junk as it is. My opinion is 
that if they get mad, let them stay mad until they get happy.

- Matt Small




From: "Gruss Gott" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
To: "CF-Community" <[email protected]>
Sent: Tuesday, December 11, 2007 9:14 AM
Subject: Christmas Charity


> Just wondering about this year's family controversy which is also an
> etiquette problem.
>
> Each year my wife and I sponsor families via  a local organization
> that screens the families - we get to know names and ages, but nothing
> else, which is fine by us.  Basically you buy gifts for the family
> members (including parents) based on a list they provide and then also
> give them money to buy Christmas dinner ($50 in this case), but you
> can provide more if you like.
>
> This year we decided to go to both sides  our family and invite them
> to not exchange gifts, and rather to sponsor a family via our program
> or anything else they'd like to do (or not do), but not to buy gifts
> for us.  The concept was not to buy each other stuff since we all are
> lucky enough to have plenty, have those with kids just buy for their
> own kids, and hopefully get everyone involved in some type of charity
> effort.
>
> Of course we knew it'd be a bit controversial to "opt out", but there
> are few hard feelings and I guess I'm wonder what you all think.  My
> instinct is to say that if people can't see the good in our choice is,
> then feck 'em.  We may end up just buying gifts for our family again
> to spare feelings, but I guess if we do it the real gift will be to
> their feelings.
>
> I know people have specific visions of Christmas, and that gifts and
> gift opening are a big part of that for some, but the joy of that has
> gone away for my wife and I whereas we actually have a blast buying
> gifts for the families we sponsor.
>
> On the one hand I want to step on the moral soapbox, but on the other
> I realize that I'm being selfish too because I enjoy buying for
> non-family over family.
>
> I dunno ... what d'ya think?
>
> 

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