seeing that I've never blown a goat, you're on your own oh master
blower of goats.

On Thu, Apr 3, 2008 at 8:59 AM, Adam Churvis
<[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
> Okay, you all understand that, when a movie truly Hoovers, I mean it
>  massively sucks beyond all methods of measurement currently known to polite
>  society, I give that movie a "Ten Blown Goats" rating.  Fair enough.
>
>
>
>  But on this one I'm stumped.  And I need your help sorting it out.
>
>
>
>  I took my wife, The Lovely And Talented Lisa, to dinner and a movie on her
>  39th birthday last week.  That movie was The Bank Job.  I'd heard good
>  things about it.  I really wanted to like it.
>
>
>
>  Unfortunately, in almost 47 years of going to movies, this was only the
>  second one I'd ever walked out of.  The other was John Houston's The Dead,
>  about twenty years ago.
>
>
>
>  You see the Bank Job trailers, it stars Jason Statham, it's based on a true
>  story - it's all good.  And the beginning of the flick has a hot-bodied
>  naked chick getting serviced by two blokes at the same time, all of them
>  deliciously rolling around in a Caribbean hotel bed.  This looks promising!
>
>
>
>  But then.  For the next half hour, there's nothing more than British people
>  talking.  And talking.  And then talking some more.  All veddy veddy
>  British.
>
>
>
>  Lisa's eyes are trying to close without her knowing it, I'm literally
>  getting antsy just waiting for this Anglican talkfest to end and someone to
>  load the van with equipment, cue the kicky soundtrack, and montage me into a
>  goddamned bank!
>
>
>
>  I'm convinced it will never, ever happen.  Just not entertaining.  So we go
>  to the manager and he's really very nice and understanding and gives us
>  passes to any movie we would like to see on a later date.
>
>
>
>  So I need your help on this one.  How do you rate a movie that is so bad
>  that there isn't even enough strength left to blow a single goat?  Zero
>  goats won't work, because that's a fantastic movie.  Perhaps an icon
>  containing a goat's head with an Infinity symbol above it?
>
>
>
>  Help me on this one, please.
>
>
>
>  Respectfully,
>
>
>
>  Adam Phillip Churvis
>
>  President
>
>  Productivity Enhancement
>
>
>
>
>
>  

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