good read i agree with much of it as well.

On Wed, Sep 3, 2008 at 2:53 AM, Beth In Alaska <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:

> Below from a friend, phrases exactly what concerns me about the Palins.
>
> "If what I read is right -- and, of course, with all the crap out there, it
> may not be -- while Sarah Palin was living in Juneau as governor (with the
> new baby), the rest of the family remained in Wasilla. But dad Todd had a
> job that required him, too, to be absent much of the time -- one week on,
> one week off. So the kids got looked after by other family members.
> Unspoken
> message to kids: our jobs are more important to us than you are.
>
> Most of the families in my circle are 2-career couples, and they have made
> various adjustments and, yes, sacrifices, especially during the vulnerable
> teen years, to try to maintain/improve/ensure the stability of the family,
> to make sure that the kids know they are loved, supported, valued, etc.
> They
> recognize that at least one parent (but preferably both, taking turns as
> needed) needs to be around enough to be involved in their kids' lives:
> driving them to & fro (and their friends, to be sure to know them and have
> their trust/respect, too), sitting in the stands when they compete in
> whatever activity they're involved in (and occasionally even peering above
> their laptop screen to actually catch some of the action), having meals
> together on a regular basis, and so on. This is not the stuff to be left to
> various family babysitters -- aunts, uncles, grandparents, etc. -- who,
> while they love the kids, are still just understudies. To grow up
> emotionally
> healthy, kids need to know their parents love them more than anything else.
>
> I don't know a single family that doesn't have issues & conflicts with its
> teens. (After all, it's Nature's way of easing the pain otherwise felt when
> they leave the nest!) But there are issues and there are issues. After
> spending a couple of Friday mornings observing the proceedings of our local
> county court awhile back (while awaiting the sentencing of the "friendly
> neighborhood burglar" who tried to break into our home), and seeing loser
> after loser on the docket, I quickly concluded that my kids are wonderful
> and vowed to never again criticize their socks-on-the-stairs habit!
> (Although I'm still not happy with their choice, after going off to
> college,
> to own a fake ID for purposes of procuring alcohol & entrance into clubs,
> though I imagine I'd have done the same!)
>
> Sometimes, in order to put the kids' needs in the forefront, a family will
> find that one parent needs to cut back hours, or take a job that maybe pays
> less but is closer, or allows flexible time or telecommuting. Sometimes a
> parent loses a job and finds a new one clear across the country -- but to
> keep the kids in a stable environment, chooses to "commute" for a year or
> two, to let a kid finish high school and allow the spouse stay at his/her
> job. I can count at least 5 families I know that that's happened to. Others
> choose to relocate the whole family, although that's less common when
> high-school-age kids are involved. In real life, families need to weigh
> what's best for the family and make tough choices like these.
>
> Throughout it all, if you want to raise children with self-esteem, so that
> they can start out in life setting lofty goals and believing they can
> achieve them -- and then really go out and achieve them -- your kids need
> to
> know you're there for them, you love them, you value their achievements,
> you
> think they make good decisions, you're all on the same team, etc. etc.
> Above
> all, they need to know they're your #1 priority.
>
> That's not the message Sarah & Todd Palin are giving their kids. When both
> parents are physically and/or emotionally absent (and often when even just
> one is), one or more of their children is almost bound to act out --
> whether
> through disciplinary problems, lousy grades, unprotected sex, drugs, petty
> crime, or whatever. It helps them test their parents' limits and love --
> and
> for a kid, negative attention is better than none.
>
> The whole issue of the new baby Trig is just another example of this
> family's not putting their children's needs first. Sarah Palin is trying to
> act like it's no big deal having a kid at all! It doesn't have to interrupt
> a thing, business as usual! Seriously, going back to work 3 days after
> giving birth??? What was she trying to prove? Who was the baby bonding with
> while she was busy playing governor? (I hope she wasn't governing AND
> getting up every 2-3 hours to feed him!) And this is a child who will need
> extensive interventions in his early months and years. She'd be a lot more
> believable preaching family values if she or her husband had taken the
> maternity/paternity leave they're allowed by law.
>
> I've never before seen a candidate's children so *not* be their parents'
> focus! Has Sarah Palin ever even said anything about wanting a better
> America for her children?? They're not in her equation at all! (Of course,
> on the other hand, we haven't heard much from her yet anyway.... maybe
> Weds.
> night!)
>
> It's not a sexist-type question of woman's vs. man's roles, mom vs. dad.
> It's a question of true family values, of a person's and a couple's real
> priorities in life. These people are sacrificing their children not for the
> good of the country (really, there are other, far more qualified people who
> could have filled the VP role), but for their own egos and ambition. (Same,
> by the way, went for John Edwards, who IMHO should not have continued his
> campaign -- let alone had an affair! -- while his wife was being treated
> for
> breast cancer. With young kids at home and mom undergoing chemo, his family
> needed him home. Ego and ambition over family, just another example.)
>
> So it's not the pregnancy that's the issue, it's the family dynamics. And
> for the insight they provide into the candidate's character, it's a
> legitimate issue."
>
>
> 

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