> Dana wrote: > amen to that. I heard anpther clip where someone said the Stapes Center was > the center of the world today. > > Give. Me. A. Break. >
Andy Borowitz BorowitzReport.com Posted: July 7, 2009 01:39 PM People With No Lives Ponder Future After Jackson Memorial With the clock ticking down to the conclusion of the Michael Jackson memorial today, millions of people who have no lives are in a quandary about how they will fill the inevitable void. That's the word from the University of Minnesota, whose Opinion Research Institute has been tracking the attitudes of people who have nothing going on in their lives since the singer's death was first announced. "We have been conducting telephone surveys with people who literally have nothing happening in their lives," says the University of Minnesota's Dr. Davis Logsdon. "We know we have an accurate sample, because those are the only people who will agree to participate in a telephone survey." According to the survey, 89% of the people with no lives agreed with the statement, "I will probably wait for some other celebrity I have not thought about for years to die and then I will get excessively emotional about him or her." Dr. Logsdon said that for Americans with no lives, the death of Michael Jackson was only one of two massive blows they have suffered in the past few weeks: "Many of them had not recovered from the news that Jon and Kate were getting a divorce. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~| Want to reach the ColdFusion community with something they want? Let them know on the House of Fusion mailing lists Archive: http://www.houseoffusion.com/groups/cf-community/message.cfm/messageid:299555 Subscription: http://www.houseoffusion.com/groups/cf-community/subscribe.cfm Unsubscribe: http://www.houseoffusion.com/cf_lists/unsubscribe.cfm?user=11502.10531.5
