Those of us old enough to remember the old Hollywood Squares Game (before Whoopi) will appreciate these. They are excerpts from the Hollywood Squares show during the 1970's.
Q: If you're going to make a parachute jump, you should be at least how high? A: Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it. Q: True or false...a pea can last as long as 5,000 years. A: George Gobel: Boy it sure seems that way sometimes... Q: You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman? A: Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake. Q: According to Cosmo, if you meet a stranger at a party and you think he's really attractive, is it okay to come out directly and ask him if he's married? A: Rose Marie: No, wait until morning. Q: Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older? A: Charley Weaver: My sense of decency. Q: In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say "I love you"? A: Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty. Q: Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather? A: Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily. Q: Charley, you've just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during your first year? A: Charley Weaver: Of course not, Peter. I'm too busy growing strawberries! Q: In bowling, what's a perfect score? A: Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy. Q: It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist camps. One is politics. What is the other? A: Paul Lynde: Tape measures. Q: Can boys join the Camp Fire Girls? A: Marty Allen: Only after lights out. Q: When you pat a dog on its head he will usually wag his tail. What will a goose do? A: Paul Lynde: Make him bark. Q: If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to? A: Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark. Q: According to Ann Landers, is their anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people? A: Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army! Q: It is the most abused and neglected part of your body - what is it? A: Paul Lynde: Mine may be abused but it certainly isn't neglected! Q: Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant? A: Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant? Q: When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for it's sex? A: Charley Weaver: I'll lend him the car. The rest is up to him. Q: Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they? A: Charley Weaver: His feet. Q: Do female frogs croak? A: Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough. -Ben ______________________________________________________________________ Your ad could be here. Monies from ads go to support these lists and provide more resources for the community. http://www.fusionauthority.com/ads.cfm Archives: http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected]/ Unsubscribe: http://www.houseoffusion.com/index.cfm?sidebar=lists
