Wow Dana, for what it's worth I am sorry you are in this mess. 

Now onto your problem. This woman is obviously irresponsible, and is
depending on the kindness of others to make up for her short comings as a
mother. I think you should tell her you or your daughter will no longer be
watching her kids. Then you should call child protective services
anonymously and tell them that those kids are in danger from a substance
abusing mother.

-----Original Message-----
From: Dana Tierney [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]
Sent: Thursday, May 29, 2003 1:40 AM
To: CF-Community
Subject: need for government intervention, or feel like a sucker....


<major vent with no relevance to other current threads, feel free to 
delete>

Or is it? I'd be interested in hearing a take from all those let em starve 
minimalist conservatives out there. In ten words or less, I have two real 
live children at my house right now.

So... here I am on deadline. The single mother up the street calls me up 
and wants my daughter to watch her kids. Nuh uh, I said, she just left with 
a friend to see a movie.

I am feeling unsympathetic.... My daughter wound up spending all night 
there two nights ago because Amanda was too out of it. Apparently she went 
out (with my daughter watching her kids) and got so drunk she hurt her 
muscles dancing at some club. So OK, maybe I am being prissy; I don't do 
the club scene but she's only about 20, with three kids under 5. And yet 
when I went to get my daughter the next day she was so out of it I called 
Poison Control to make sure she hadn't OD'ed. She roused enough to tell me 
she had taked three Percosets, a Xanax, three Darvocets and a couple of 
different kinds of musle relaxers. Welp, my daughter is scheduled to be 
doing something and I am not going to let her blow it off because this 
chick is too messed up...but I can't just walk away because hey, the 
youngest here is about one and a half and mom is just plain too messed up. 
I call around and find another of her friends who is willing to come over 
and deal with the situation. That was Sunday.

Yesterday she called and said could her kids come over so she could clean 
her house.  I said hell no, I'm still cleaning up from the last time they 
were over here.

So today she has an appointment for an MRI. Ok, it really would be very 
hard to watch three kids that age while getting an MRI, so I say fine OK 
I'll watch the two older ones (aged 3 and 4), but not the baby. I need to 
get SOME work done here. And try to hurry.

You guessed it. That was at 1pm... it's now after 11. She called me at 6 
and told me they were admitting her. For a torn ligament I said? Amanda, 
I've had a torn ligament. They don't admit you for that. She gave me to 
some guy who told me he was a doctor. He was drunk. Well, ok, he was 
slurring his words, and he didn't talk like a doctor. Feeling like a heel I 
asked him where she was. He names a hospital. Funny, I said, I just called 
there looking for her. They dont have a patient by that name. I dunno, he 
said. She is here on the third floor. Room 327. OK. I told him that if I 
could reach her there through the switchboard I would owe her a HUGE 
apology, got a name and phone number from him (totally different exchange 
from the actual number for the hospital) and tried the switchboard again. 
No patient by that name. Are you sure I said. She just called me, told me 
she was in room 327. Loooong pause on hold. Some one who identifies 
themself as an ER supervisor comes on and tells me there is no patient by 
that name in the hospital. Period. And all clinics are closed. While I am 
on this phone call she leaves me a voice message that her ex-husband (who 
she has previously told me smokes crank) is coming over to get the kids. Oh 
goodie.

Daughter gets home at 8. I ask her to watch kids while I look into Amanda's 
whereabouts. Discuss this with neighbor. We are not sure if the kids are 
better off with a messed up mother who loves them, or an indifferent foster 
care system. I really don't want cops OR social workers at my house thank 
you very much. A totally different guy calls me and tells me he picked 
Amanda up at the hospital and she is passed out at his house. He says he is 
too drunk to drive. I thank him for calling. Who's taking care of the baby? 
I ask. I am he says. I love that baby. I have met him once and he seems 
like a pretty steady guy. I hesitate. I tell him Amanda has lied to me and 
I need to kick her ass, and the situation is way out of hand, and he better 
make sure that baby is OK. He says he will. I have his number on caller ID.

OK so.. kids are safe for tonight. I call the friend who came over Sunday. 
I am not volunteering, he says. Put up with it for as long as you can then 
do what you have to do.  He does not have a phone number for any of her 
relatives. Hubbie never showed up.

I am thinking I am gonna have to make the call. We can't keep watching the 
kids; we are enabling. I hope there are relatives, but I have no way to 
reach them...and I can't see just letting her pick the kids up in the 
morning. Recent experience says the kids will NOT be ok.

</rant>

Dana

-- 
Someone has to knuckle down and change history, and that someone is you - 
The Doctor


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