Awww, relationship issues are so tough. Especially when change is involved. Change is a scarey word for some..myself included. But you are moving in the right direction. Even if you don't know the end result, you have recognized you have to make yourself happy first. It is wonderful to be unselfish and give of yourself, but you have to be happy too. It must be very stressful, and I think a bit unfair, to be in a position of uncertainty whether your partner wants you to be in his life or not. In my opinion, a relationship is a partnership with both people committing equally physically and emotionally. If that isnt there, it is using.. You are grieving right now and that is ok..but there is an old cliche but a very true one..When one door closes, another opens. And in my experience, it turns out to be a positive move. You just have to slow your mind down, and get past the fear.. Pam M
From: "[email protected]" <[email protected]> To: [email protected] Sent: Tuesday, November 1, 2011 10:11 PM Subject: Re: [Chihuahuas] Monster Its not that he didn't get all the way better last time. He probably did but he has a few disks that could be prone to this so this time its a different disk I believe. Some very OT stuff now that I need to get off my chest... I hope you don't mind... If you don't wanna read my life story then you should stop now. I'm going through some really tough personal stuff that started a couple days ago. I currently have a fiance and am going to college. Our relationship has always been rocky except for the last year or so. Well, recently, he has made some changes in the way he thinks and he is now extremely focused on his music career and he's really passionate about it. I am really happy for him but I don't know what's gonna happen with us... We really love each other but the way he keeps talking about the future makes me think I'm not in it. We talked about it and still have a lot more talking to do but he says that he doesn't know if I'm in his future or not. He says he can't see that far because he's so focused on his career now. My biggest problem is that I don't know what I want to do with my life, what I'm really passionate about... I'm extremely lost right now and I've just been crying for hours at a time. The more I think about it, the more lost I get. I look around me and I'm terrified of change and being alone. My fiance isn't breaking up with me as of now but he did say it was a mistake asking me to marry him because it wasn't fair to us because we haven't found ourselves yet. I want you to know that I'm not mad at him or hate him or anything for this and I don't want any hate mail against him. I just want and need someone else's advice. I barely have one friend and we're aren't close friends yet and I can't talk to my family because they are always negative about him and would focus on that instead of helping me. I need to figure out what will make me happy. I thought I was getting this degree (wildlife biology) for me but I'm not happy with it and I think I'm pretty much trying to finish school for everyone else because I don't wanna disappoint anyone. My whole life I've thought about everyone else and now I need to think about me and I'm having an incredibly hard time doing that. I have no idea who I am. I know I love Monster and whatever I do has to include him. I know I love Arthur too but it takes two to keep a relationship going and even though he loves me, he's found his calling and I'm not gonna make him give that up. Any advice is appreciated and if there is none, thanks for listening... I really needed to "talk" it out. Lorena Sent via BlackBerry by AT&T From: Joan Croft <[email protected]> Sender: [email protected] Date: Tue, 1 Nov 2011 18:18:30 -0700 To: <[email protected]> ReplyTo: [email protected] Subject: RE: [Chihuahuas] Monster I agree with you that he needs some holding and loving. He may be looking at you strangely because of the meds he is on. I stare like that sometimes…LOL I really do hope that he gets all the way well this time. It looks like your vet is very good that he uses laser surgery for the disks. Joan, Dolly Dee & Desi Lou From:[email protected] [mailto:[email protected]] On Behalf Of [email protected] Sent: Tuesday, November 01, 2011 3:06 PM To: [email protected] Subject: Re: [Chihuahuas] Monster I might try that when he starts wanting out. He's really not that bad but it hurts me to have to leave him in the crate all the time. I do take him out and hold him for a little while even though some say not to do that. They need the love and to be held some. Sometimes, like right now, he lays there and just stares at me and I feel like he's thinking let me out. It takes 8 wks for a disk to heal all the way and that's how long you're supposed to keep them on crate rest... Lorena Sent via BlackBerry by AT&T From: Joan Croft <[email protected]> Sender: [email protected] Date: Tue, 1 Nov 2011 13:47:42 -0700 To: <[email protected]> ReplyTo: [email protected] Subject: RE: [Chihuahuas] Monster Prayers for Monster. Do you think that if you gave him some calming chews or something else it would make his time in the crate easier? Maybe some new treat or something to chew on while he is in there. Joan, Dolly Dee & Desi Lou From:[email protected] [mailto:[email protected]] On Behalf Of [email protected] Sent: Tuesday, November 01, 2011 10:17 AM To: [email protected] Subject: Re: [Chihuahuas] Monster Well, I'm at the vet now and Monster is getting a laser therapy treatment. He's also gonna be on a few meds and on crate rest for a few weeks just like last time. He's not near as bad as he was last time so I'm glad for that. I still wish he didn't have to go through this. Crate rest is the worst because he has to stay in it 24/7 and its so hard when he starts feeling better and wanting to play because I can't let him or the disk won't heal properly. And even after crate rest he won't be able to do much as his return to activity has to be gradual. Maybe the laser therapy will make it heal faster. We had just started going on walks again because the weather is so nice and I'm gonna miss that. Back home now. He finished the therapy treatment and we had to drive back home before I could finish this email. He's doing even better now. It looks like the laser therapy is already working. He may be getting some more therapy treatments. I need go do some more research on it so I know what exactly it is doing and what, if any, questions I need to ask the vet. Lorena Sent via BlackBerry by AT&T From: [email protected] Sender: [email protected] Date: Tue, 1 Nov 2011 11:30:18 -0400 (EDT) To: <[email protected]> ReplyTo: [email protected] Subject: Re: [Chihuahuas] Monster Oh, Lorena, I am so sorry to hear Monster is still having problems. I have been wondering about you since you haven't posted in a while. Keep us updated, please. Sending healing glows to Monster. Gloria -----Original Message----- From: lgorum18 <[email protected]> To: chihuahuas <[email protected]> Sent: Mon, Oct 31, 2011 9:31 pm Subject: [Chihuahuas] Monster Monster may be having another disk episode.... For those of you new here, Monster was diagnosed with disk disease in March after being in a lot of pain and not wanting to move. Right now he isn't as bad as last time. He isn't yelping and he still tries to walk around. I can tell he's in pain become he is shaking some and his abdomen is really tight. I have him in his crate so he won't move around and hurt it any further. I just talked to the vet and he said to give him some meds that I have leftover from last time and bring him in in the morning. Lorena Sent via BlackBerry by AT&T
