Hi Jeanie,
First, thank you for the birthday greetings.
The part of my autobiography that I sent to you is only a very small
portion of my book. As I help someone I add it to my book. As someone
helps me I also add it to my book so I will never publish it but I do
send parts of it to people that are dealing with Leukemia and are
looking to go through a bone marrow transplant.
Since there are some people that are mentioned in my book I have to be
very careful on who I send it to. Most of the people in my book have
agreed to have their names and stories given out but there are some
that I have lost contact with and can not get their permission. In
some cases I just use their innitials or change their names for their
privacy. I still like to "shield" Gloria because of her privacy.
I am including one of my favorite stories, about a lady named Gloria.
I feel that by helping her through everything that she had to go
through was one of the highlights of my life. We still remain very
close friends to this day. Something very unusual about Gloria and
myself. If she is having a bad day or if I am having a bad day we both
know it and call each other. I just can't explain it but it seems that
we have this special connection to each other.
Gloria
I became involved with a web site called Caringbridge about a year
ago. This is a site where people that are ill, usually Leukemia, but
other life threatening illnesses as well can post their experiences of
what they are going through by having cancer. People visit these sites
and give support, encouragement and prayers to them. This is where I
first met Gloria D. She is a woman in her early thirties and has a
sister by the name of Mary. Mary used to update the Caringbridge site
as Gloria went through the transplant ordeal. It was a very difficult
time for Gloria, Mary and their mother Nancy, as well as all of their
family. It is a very religious, pious and close-knit family, and there
was so many on the Internet site that would leave their support and
prayers.
I truly believe that if Gloria hadnt felt that everyone wasnt praying
for her to get through this terrible time she wouldnt have made it.
There is a very special connection with all of her family and GOD that
through her belief it made it something so strong that it was like GOD
came down and kissed her.
It was also a time for her to test her beliefs, and I must say that
she beat this horrible disease for the shear beliefs that she and her
family all have. They are all very amazing people that I truly admire.
I would always try to encourage her by sending her little poems and
things that I went through. I would try to let her know that those
very terrible mouth sores that probably were the worst part of her
ordeal would subside as soon as her white blood count would come up.
Sometimes when someone that had already gone through it tells what to
expect before it actually happens then the patient is more prepared,
and knows what to expect. It is a shame that she wasnt told about some
of the things she would be going through beforehand.
I know just how much Gloria had to endure and to put it bluntly she
really suffered, both in mind and body. Sometimes she wouldnt post
anything because she was too sick to let anyone know. Her sister Mary
would usually do all of the posts on the Caringbridge site, and when
she didnt we all really started to worry.
I had spoken with Mary most of the time, but with also their mother,
Nancy. There were so many concerns, and whenever I would be asked a
question I would always answer any of them as honestly as I could.
This also brought back some memories about when I used to be the go
between Judy and Adam Pasamanick. Judy was Adams mother and as I
previously mentioned it was Judy that encouraged me to write all of
this down.
>From all of my experiences with helping those whose mothers were also
involved with me I found that it always meant more to the mothers then
to the actual patient at the time. In a way by me becoming involved
with the parents, usually the mother, it sort of filtered down to the
actual patient.
Probably this all happened because of what the patient was going
through at the time. I vividly remember most of the time of how I
felt, usually miserable and in a lot of excruciating pain, and couldnt
let the rest of the world into my life. But whenever my mom came there
to visit and help I was able to have my mind focused on each and every
word, feeling and emotion she had. I guess that this is also how
Gloria must have felt.
I received this e-mail from her shortly after she got home. Gloria, as
I would tell her, you are now a survivor, and you will go through life
being happy and healthy. Gloria and her family are another success
story
HI Marty...
This is Gloria, I just wanted to drop you a line to let you know how
much I appreciate your words of encouragement. They have meant so much
to my mom and me. Thank you for being there for her on so many
occasions. You gave her "peace of mind" at times when she had none.
I'm doing pretty well. I'm on liquid Donnatal for my stomach. I've
been on it for several weeks now. It seems to be aiding in my healing,
but the downside is, it's a barbiturate and my body is getting used to
it (addicted).
I get really sick and crampy in my arms and legs if I miss a dose. It
keeps my stomach from spasming though. Guess I have to take the good
with the bad. Anyhow, I'm glad I had the opportunity to write you and
I wish you
and your family "A blessed Christmas Holiday". You and yours are in
our thoughts and prayers.
Love Gloria
Or this:
Dear Marty...
I was just looking at all of the postings on my Caringbridge site and
everything that you wrote me in my most critical time, my darkest
hour...was so beautiful, inspirational and hopeful...Thank you, for
keeping my mom's chin up, it was so very hard for her to deal with me
having cancer. Mom says "HI" and sends her love. Asks how your brother
Sidney is doing. Hope all is peaceful and well with you and those you
love...
With a heartful of love for you...Gloria
At Glorias one-year post transplant she wrote the following in her journal:
On a much lighter note...Below are pictures of the lovely Gartenberg
family...Marty, his wife Shelly and their daughter Meredith. Mom and I
had the pleasure of meeting them on Tuesday for lunch before they
headed back home to Pennsylvania. Marty found me on this site last
year when I was in the hospital gearing up for transplant. Marty,
himself is a transplant SURVIVOR of over 17 years and has spent his
years past transplant, dedicating his time and energy, helping cancer
patients and giving "HOPE"... Having gone thru this, he helps others
to know what to expect and is always there to enlighten and
acknowledge those dealing with every aspect of cancer. He's so very
special to my family and me and I am so grateful to him for the many
times he's spent consoling my mom when she was in need of answers.
Meeting Marty was and always will be one of the most special times
that I will remember and cherish for the rest of my life...THIS WAS
MARTY'S FIRST POST HERE ON MY CARINGBRIDGE SITE...Dear Gloria, my name
is Marty and I had a bone marrow transplant more than 16 years ago.
Ever since then, I am leading a healthy and productive life. I was
only 45 when I was diagnosed with CML. The procedure was quite
different from what it is today. There have been so many improvements,
that I know you will have a much better time of it.You will be going
through a lot, but please take one day at a time and you will see that
you will be able to do whatever you have to, in order to get your life
back...and you WILL!I am now 60 years old and although I will never
forget what I went through, I make it my obligation to help others go
through it. Most of whom I've helped are still here today, and living
productive lives.I see that you already know Zavie Miller. Just ask
him about me, and by the way, I know that GOD listens to my prayers,
and now you are added to my list...Marty
This is Gloria today, healthy and happy. What a success story she is
not only to herself and her family, but to all of those that would
read and post to her website. She is a living miracle that brings hope
and inspiration to others who may be following in her footsteps. The
journey that she and I took can only inspire others to have hope
because this battle can be won. In order to travel this long difficult
road you really have to believe in yourself more then anything in the
world
Myself, my loving wife Shelly and our daughter Meredith
(Sorry the pictures did not come through)
So, I guess that I was correct about how parents feel, especially
mothers, and it was my honor to be able to help Nancy as well as Mary
and of course Gloria.
Gloria, and I and our families still remain close, and we always keep in touch.
The other day Gloria had called me and asked me to take a picture of
my home in Florida. I went outside and as I was about to take a
picture I glanced up into the sky right above my house and saw a
skywriting plane inscribing a message in the beautiful sunny clear
sky.
I snapped the picture and e-mailed it to her, and she decided to put
it, and its explanation into her Caring-Bridge journal
Wednesday, February 15, 2006 10:30 AM CST
YESTERDAY, I GOT AN EMAIL FROM MY DEAR FRIEND MARTY GARTENBERG...MARTY
AND HIS FAMILY STAY AT THEIR FLORIDA HOME FOR THE COLD MONTHS AND I
HAD ASKED HIM TO GO OUTSIDE AND TAKE SOME PICTURES FOR ME TO SEE! WELL
MUCH TO HIS SURPRISE WHEN HE VENTURED OUT TO SNAP SOME PICS, THIS IS
WHAT HE SAW UP IN THE SKY UP ABOVE HIS HOUSE!!!...SEE YOU ALL DON'T
KNOW MARTY, BUT I DO...AND I KNOW THAT THIS WAS NOT A COINCEDENCE BUT
"BASHERT" (meant to be) A WORD THAT MARTY HAS TAUGHT ME. FOR ALL OF
YOU JUST DROPPING IN HERE ON MY CARINGBRIDGE PAGE, MARTY GARTENBERG IS
AN 18 YEAR POST BONE MARROW TRANSPLANT SURVIVOR FOR THE SAME TYPE OF
LEUKEMIA THAT I HAD "CML"...HE IS MY 'HOPE' FOR LONGEVITY AND GOD
BLESS HIM FOR FINDING ME WHEN HE DID!...MOM AND I HAD THE PLEASURE OF
MEETING MARTY, HIS WIFE SHELLY AND DAUGHTER MEREDITH, FOR THE FIRST
TIME BACK IN SEPTEMBER WHEN HE WAS HERE IN DETROIT VISITING HIS
BROTHER. IMMEDIATELY THE CONNECTION THAT HAD STARTED THROUGH HIS
ON-LINE CONVERSATIONS WITH ME AT MY FRAGILE TIME AND THE KINDNESS THAT
HE GAVE MY MOM ANSWERING HER QUESTIONS DURING LATE NIGHT PHONE CALLS
WHILE I WAS IN THE HOSPITAL, TRANSPIRED INTO A LOVELY BOND THAT WE
SHARE AND MOM AND I CONSIDER MARTY AND HIS FAMILY TO BE A PART OF 'OUR
FAMILY' TOO!!!..WE ARE BLESSED TO KNOW THEM! "WE LOVE THE
GARTENBERG'S"!!!!THE ********* FAMILY
(Please note, I left out Gloria's last name for her privacy)
My dear friend Gloria wrote this about me and I was really surprised
of just how much she thinks of me. Whenever I help someone it comes
from my heart, and I see that it also comes from hers as well.
Wednesday, April 12, 2006 10:36 AM CDT
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~MARTY~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~I JUST
RECEIVED A PHONE CALL EARLY THIS AFTERNOON FROM MY DEAR FRIEND MARTY
GARTENBERG. ANYONE WHO'S FOLLOWED MY JOURNALS THESE PAST FEW YEARS HAS
TO KNOW WHO MARTY IS AND JUST WHAT HE MEANS TO ME AND MY
FAMILY...MARTY IS A CML 'SURVIVOR' LIKE ME, THE ONLY DIFFERENCE IS
THAT HE IS OVER 18 YEARS POST BONE MARROW TRANSPLANT AND I AM ONLY
2.HE IS IN HIS 60'S AND I AM IN MY 40'S. OTHER THAN THESE DIFFERENCES,
WE SHARE THE COMMON BOND OF HAVING WALKED THE SAME JOURNEY. I AM PROUD
TO CALL HIM MY 'FRIEND'TODAYS PHONE CALL FROM MARTY WAS NOT LIKE THE
USUAL CALLS TO ME...TODAY MARTY CALLED 'ASKING US TO PRAY FOR HIM'"I'M
JUST GOING TO LEAVE IT AT THAT UNTIL WE HAVE FURTHER INFORMATION"...I
AM ASKING 'ALL' OF YOU WHO'VE BLESSED ME WITH YOUR PRAYERS AND HAVE
KEPT ME IN YOUR THOUGHTS, TO PLEASE TURN THEM ALL TO MARTY, BECAUSE WE
ALL NEED AND LOVE HIM.MARTY IS THE MOST SELFLESS, LOVING AND CARING
AND KIND MAN THAT I'VE EVER MET IN MY WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE. HE IS GENUINE
WITH THE WAY HE GIVES OF HIMSELF TO OTHERS. HE DOES GOD'S WORK TO
SPREAD 'HOPE' AND 'LOVE' AND 'FAITH'."CALLING ALL ANGELS"...~~~~~~~WE
LOVE YOU MARTY~~~~~~~~~
This is a post from Gloria's journal.
Journal Monday, July 17, 2006 5:54 PM CDT IF ANY OF YOU HAVE BEEN
FOLLOWING MY JOURNALS, YOU SEE HIM ON THIS PAGE, YOU'VE READ ABOUT HIM
IN MY JOURNAL POSTINGS AND YOU'VE HIM SEEN HIM SIGNING MY GUESTBOOK
FOR ALMOST TWO YEARS THIS AUGUST 2006.WHEN I WAS ADMITTED TO KARMANOS
CANCER INSTITUTE, MONDAY SEPTEMBER 20TH 2004 TO BEGIN MY TRANSPLANT
JOURNEY...I HAD NO IDEA WHAT WAS AHEAD OF ME BECAUSE THERE ISN'T ANY
MANUAL OR WRITTEN DOCUMENT THAT COULD EVERY HAVE THE ABILITY TO
DESCRIBE JUST WHAT THE WHOLE EXPERIENCE IS LIKE.MY MOTHER AND THE REST
OF MY FAMILY WERE FRIGHTENED,..."WE WERE WALKING BLINDLY INTO THE
UNKNOWN, BECAUSE AS EVERYONE IN OUR LITTLE 'CLUB' THAT NO ONE WANTED
TO BECOME A MEMBER OF KNOWS...EACH EXPERIENCE IS DIFFERENT. NO TWO
EXPERIENCES IN REGARDS TO TRANSPLANT ARE THE SAME. IT'S A 'TRIAL BY
ERROR', THROW CAUTION TO THE WIND AND PUT YOUR "FAITH" IN THE "WILL OF
GOD'S HANDS" JOURNEY.BEFORE MY TRANSPLANT, I WOULD SIT FOR HOURS IN
THE FLOOR AT BORDER'S READING THROUGH ALL THE MATERIALS I COULD TO
FIND OUT MORE ABOUT MY DISEASE BEING THAT CML IS A RARE FORM OF
LEUKEMIA. BECAUSE TRANSPLANT FOR CML IS FAIRLY NEW, THERE WERE NO
UPDATED BOOKS, NO MATERIALS OR REFERENCE GUIDES FOR ME,...THAT WAS
UNTIL A MONTH BEFORE MY TRANSPLANT IN AUGUST 2004 A BOOK ABOUT THE NEW
CANCER DRUG CALLED "THE MAGIC CANCER BULLET" REFERRING TO GLEEVEC CAME
OUT. I WAS INITIALLY PUT ON THIS DRUG AS ALL OF THE REST OF THE NEWLY
DIAGNOSED IN THAT TIME FRAME AND BECAME PART OF 'MEDICAL HISTORY'...I
AGREED TO LET THEM DOCUMENT THE EFFECTS OF GLEEVEC, AS MANY OF US DID
IN HOPES OF FURTHER ADVANCING THEIR ABILITY TO ENHANCE AND INCORPORATE
MORE TRIAL DRUGS FOR US CANCER PATIENTS.HERE'S WHERE MARTY COMES INTO
PLAY. MARTY GOT DIRECTED TO MY CARINGBRIDGE SITE BY ZAVIE MILLER, A
CML SURVIVOR OF SEVERAL YEARS NOW WHO IS ALSO ON GLEEVEC. I MET ZAVIE
THROUGH THE CML SUPPORT GROUP ON YAHOO. THERE WERE FEW IF NONE IN THE
GROUP WHO HAD TRANSPLANTED. ONE THAT I KNOW OF 5 1/2 MONTHS BEFORE ME,
DAN ******. HE'S DOING WONDERFULLY! MARTY WROTE HIS FIRST POST IN MY
GUESTBOOK HERE ON CARINGBRIDGE ON SATURDAY, OCT 2ND 2004, JUST TWO
DAYS AFTER MY TRANSPLANT....HE HAD EMAILED WITH MOM AND MARY PRIOR TO
HIS POST. HIS WORDS OF ENCOURAGEMENT WERE SO POWERFUL THAT HE MADE MY
MOM FEEL LIKE 'WE CAN DO THIS'...'IT'S OK.'..."EVERYTHING WILL BE
ALRIGHT"....EVEN THOUGH WE DIDN'T KNOW WHAT WAS TO COME OF IT...THE
HOPE, THE LOVE AND THE SHOULDER TO LEAN UPON THAT MARTY GAVE TO MY
MOTHER IN THAT MOST FRAGILE TIME REMAINS SO VERY PRECIOUS IN THE
HEARTS OF "ALL" OF MY FAMILY..ESPECIALLY IN MINE. AT FIRST WHEN MOM
WOULD READ ME THE POSTS FROM MY PAGE HERE ON CARINGBRIDGE FROM
MARTY...I DIDN'T WANT TO HEAR IT...I WAS SUFFERING TOO MUCH TO THINK
THAT ANYONE OTHER THAN MY FAMILY REALLY CARED ABOUT HOW 'I WAS
FEELING' IT TOOK ME AWHILE TO WARM UP TO THAT IDEA...BUT YOU SEE, I
WAS JUST BEGINNING MY JOURNEY..I DIDN'T HAVE ANY CONCEPT OF THE BOND
THAT WE WHO'VE WALKED THIS PATH HAVE COME TO KNOW AMONGST EACH OTHER.
I NOW KNOW AND FEEL THIS BOND THAT COMES FROM THE OTHER MASKED FACES
AT CLINIC EACH TIME I GO FOR FOLLOW UP...I SEE IT IN THE EYES THAT
WINK BACK AT ME, THAT LETS ME KNOW THERE'S A WARM SMILE BEHIND THE
MASK JUST AS THE ONE I'M GIVING BACK IN RETURN. IT'S IN THE SHARING OF
STORIES WITH STRANGERS WHILE WAITING TO HAVE MY WEEKLY BLOOD LABS
DRAWN. IT'S THE WAY MY HEART STRINGS GET TUGGED EVERY TIME I SEE A NEW
FRESHLY BALD HEAD, OR SEE A NEW PATIENT SITTING IN THE CHEMO
LOUNGE...I'VE BEEN A PATIENT COMING UPON 3 YEARS THIS NOVEMBER, AND
GOD WILLING THIS SEPTEMBER WILL MARK ME POST TRANS 2 YEARS. LIKE LANCE
ARMSTRONG WROTE IN HIS BOOK "CANCER MAY LEAVE YOUR BODY. BUT IT WILL
NEVER LEAVE YOUR LIFE".THIS IS TRUE...BUT THE GRACE OF GOD REMAINS
THAT 'TIME HEALS ALL WOUNDS' MARTY IS TO ME AN 'ANGEL' BECAUSE HE
APPEARED FROM OUT OF NOWHERE, IN AN INSTANT AND CALMED AND SOOTHED AND
HELPED TO HEAL OUR BROKEN HEARTS. HE DOES THE WORKS OF OUR 'MAKER' AND
I AM SO VERY VERY PROUD TO CALL HIM 'MY FRIEND'...MOM AND I HAD THE
PLEASURE OF MEETING MARTY, HIS WIFE SHELLY AND DAUGHTER MEREDITH LAST
AUGUST WHEN HE WAS IN TOWN HERE VISITING HIS BROTHER SYDNEY. IT WAS SO
AMAZING TO SEE HIM FOR THE FIRST TIME AND WE IMMEDIATELY BECAME
'FAMILY' FROM THAT POINT ON. THERE'S NOT A WEEK THAT GOES BY THAT WE
DON'T WRITE OR CALL ONE ANOTHER...HOW LUCKY AM I? ANYHOW...I'VE JUST
ABOUT WRITTEN A 'MINI NOVEL' HERE AND COULD GO ON AND ON AND ON....I
JUST WANTED TO TELL YOU WHAT HE MEANS TO ME AND NOW TO SHOW YOU WHAT
HE MEANS TO EVERYONE...TO ALL THE LIVES HE'S TOUCHED..FOR ALL THAT
HE'S GIVEN BACK FOR THE GRACE GRANTED HIM..THIS IS MARTY GARTENBERG,
17-YEAR BMT SURVIVOR FOR CML.THIS WAS THE ARTICLE ON HIM FEATURED IN
THE MONTHLY PUBLICATION "LIFELINE" PUT OUT BY "THE BONE MARROW
FOUNDATION" BASED OUT OF NEW YORK CITY. WE LOVE YOU MARTY & FAMILY~THE
********'S P.S. I'M TRYING REALLY HARD TO FOLLOW IN YOUR FOOTSTEPS.
"BIG SHOES TO FILL"!!:)
Dear Gloria and all of the *******'s, and anyone else that may be
reading this. If there is anything that I have learned throughout my
journey it was to sit back and reflect about all of the things that I
have been through. Things that one can only explain if that person had
already gone through this. Things that may make it a bit easier for
those that must follow in what I have already gone through. There are
those that will unfortunately be diagnosed with cancer, and it is all
of us that can, and should try to help them. Just as if it were part
of your family that you would be helping, so should you extend
yourself to helping others as well. I am not a hero just a mortal
person that had to go through this, and it is such a pleasure for me
to become involved with someone and see them return to health. This is
just what my dear friends Gloria and Zavie and so many others have
done. There will unfortunately be others that will suffer from cancer,
but they should also know that there is always hope. The more that you
know about what is going to happen and what to expect and how to take
care of yourself the easier it is to survive. Gloria's CaringBridge
web site is a medium, a tool if you will for helping others, and I
think that this is a wonderful tool to see just what her life was
before, during and finally after suffering this horrid disease. I want
to thank you dear Gloria for sharing this with others. People have to
see what you went through in order for them to also go through this.
Gloria, I have no footsteps that you or anyone else can follow, just
whatever you can learn from me as I have also learned from you and the
many others that post here, and else ware. People suffer, and maybe if
they learn then their suffering is less. You have suffered but it was
worth each and every second of it because your still here, as is Zavie
and the many others as well. I remember when I first met up with
Zavie, and the trials that he has been through. There were three of
us, myself, Zavie and Jeff. We each in our own ways survived this
ordeal. Me by a bone marrow transplant because at the time there was
no option of Gleevec. Zavie came later, and it was good timing that it
was afterward because Gleevec was then first available, and he is
another success story. Then there is Jeff. He also is a survivor
because at the time there were only two viable options, one was a bone
marrow transplant, for which he had no matching donor, and the other
was for Interferon which he started many years ago, and is now
leukemia free, and by the way also off of Interferon. So as you can
see this is something that can be conquered in many different ways,
and there are still new and better treatments coming out, and even
more will be saved. I urge others to post their experiences here in
this forum so that others can learn. I know that there are a lot of
"lurkers" that check in here to see what's going on but maybe they
might also want to write something that may be of help to them, and
others once those others read it. It's just like a snow ball moving
along, it gets larger and larger as it goes on it's way. I am glad
that Gloria has decided to keep this CaringBridge site going. She is a
gifted and talented writer, and has kept this journal of hers showing
all of her experiences whether they be good or bad. She tells it
exactly as it is, and always in detail for us to learn. Martin
Gartenberg
******************************************************************************
Unfortunately, my brother is suffering from lung cancer, and he lives
close to Gloria and her parents. Since he lives in Michigan I decided
to go see him along with my family. During our visit I had the
opportunity of finally meeting Gloria and her mother Nancy. We all got
together for lunch and had a good time talking about everything.
My brother is on a new kind of experimental study, which allowed only
52 people to participate, and he just happened to be that 52nd one. He
is receiving an experimental drug and so far in the last two months it
has shown that the tumors in his lungs have shrunken more then 30%. I
do hope and prey that this will continue.
Unfortunately my brother passed away from his disease in the summer of
2006, and I attended his funeral. I was so saddened because of how
much I loved him, and all that he was able to do for me during my
illness and I was powerless to be able to help him. While he was alive
I would call him and try to cheer him up, and we both knew that it was
just a matter of time.
18's,
Marty
On Thu, May 22, 2014 at 6:30 PM, ICANDOALLTTC via CMLHope
<[email protected]> wrote:
> Hi Marty and Happy Birthday!
> I read your book last night, and I simple loved it!
> When you finish it, you should get it published so others can learn from
> what you went through.
> It's a great story and you tell it with such a passion.
> I feel what I went through with my CML journey doesn't compare with the pain
> you have endured.
> You are truly a faithful warrior, and you lift all of us up as we hear your
> updates and advice.
> Happy Birthday to your and your wife.
> Blessings,
> Jeanie<3
>
>
> In a message dated 5/21/2014 10:01:05 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time,
> [email protected] writes:
>
> Well, it's May 21st which is my first and second birthday. I was
> actually born on May 21st 1944 and had my bone marrow transplant when
> I was 45 years old on May 21st 1989. If you do the math I'm 70 years
> old today.
>
> My wife Shelly celabrated her birthday yesterday May 20th.
>
> 18's,
>
> Marty
>
> --
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