If I ever had the opportunity to come face to face with politicians such as 
John Kerry or Ted Kennedy, I would take the time to compliment them on their 
magnificent sailing yachts, then tell them that I only had a lowly 1981 C&C 34, 
and that I would be certain that with their philosophy of taking from the rich 
and giving to the poor, that they would gladly give me their boat plus the 
money for upkeep, etc.

Ed
Briar Patch
New Orleans, La.

From: CnC-List [mailto:[email protected]] On Behalf Of Richard N. 
Bush
Sent: Tuesday, November 05, 2013 8:42 AM
To: [email protected]
Subject: Stus-List The Affordable Boat Act

Here to get em' stirred up ... (and its boating related!)...applies to USA 
only...

(Disclaimer, this is intended as humor only and is not intended to be political 
or offensive to anyone, except maybe Nancy Pelosi)
Richard
1987 33-II

Richard N. Bush Law Offices
2950 Breckenridge Lane, Suite 9
Louisville, Kentucky 40220
502-584-7255

The Affordable Boat Act

The U.S. government has just passed a new law called: "The affordable boat act" 
declaring that every citizen MUST purchase a new boat, by April 2014. These 
"affordable" boats will cost an average of $54,000-$155,000 each. This does not 
include taxes, trailers, towing fees, licensing and registration fees, fuel, 
docking and storage fees, maintenance or repair costs.

This law has been passed, because until now, typically only wealthy and 
financially responsible people have been able to purchase boats. This new law 
ensures that every American can now have a "affordable" boat of their own, 
because everyone is "entitled" to a new boat. If you purchase your boat before 
the end of the year, you will receive 4 "free" life jackets; not including 
monthly usage fees.

In order to make sure everyone purchases an affordable boat, the costs of 
owning a boat will increase on average of 250-400% per year. This way, wealthy 
people will pay more for something that other people don’t want or can’t afford 
to maintain. But to be fair, people who can’t afford to maintain their boat 
will be regularly fined and children (under the age of 26) can use their 
parents boats to party on until they turn 27; then must purchase their own boat.

If you already have a boat, you can keep yours as long as it meets federal 
minimum essential requirements, including accessories and options people 
wouldn't otherwise purchase on their own. If you don’t want or don’t need a 
boat, you are required to buy one anyhow. If you refuse to buy one or can’t 
afford one, you will be regularly fined $800 until you purchase one or face 
imprisonment.

Failure to use the boat will also result in fines. People living in the desert, 
ghettos, inner cities or areas with no access to lakes are not exempt. Neither 
age, motion sickness, experience, knowledge nor lack of desire are acceptable 
excuses for not using your boat.

A government review board (that doesn’t know the difference between the port, 
starboard or stern of a boat) will decide everything, including; when, where, 
how often, and for what purposes you can use your boat along with how many 
people can ride your boat and determine if one is too old or healthy enough to 
be able to use their boat. They will also decide if your boat has out lived its 
usefulness or if you must purchase specific accessories,(like a $500 compass) 
or a newer and more expensive boat.

Those that can afford yachts will be required to do so...it's only fair. The 
government will also decide the name for each boat. Failure to comply with 
these rules will result in fines and possible imprisonment.

Government officials are exempt from this new law. If they want a boat, they 
and their families can obtain boats free, at the expense of tax payers. Unions, 
bankers and mega companies with large political affiliations ($$$) are also 
exempt.

_______________________________________________
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