Fascinating that we've all learned mostly the same things at wedding and other ONS dances... The "Rose" dance, or "Fan" dance, or "Hat Dance" is also fun to do with a broom - the person in the middle who gets stuck with the broom can chase the dancing couple down the hall a ways, while "Sweeping them away," if they want. I've tried this one with various props, and I think the broom has been the most fun, and funny. Ben Allbrandt
> On 07/05/2023 10:00 AM EDT Tony Parkes via Contra Callers > <[email protected]> wrote: > > > > This is just about my favorite dance-game, but I had never encountered the > name “Favor of the Rose” before. I first learned it as “The Rose and the > Thorn,” then more recently heard “A Rose Between Two Thorns” (of course, > traditionally it’s gendered and typically starts with a lady between two > gents). It’s also known as “The Hat Dance” or “The Fan Dance,” depending on > the prop used. > > > > By coincidence, just last Saturday I bought a satin rose on plastic stem, to > replace one that I had carried in my kit for years and that had recently > disappeared. The new one is huge – twice the size and length of the old one; > that’s what they had at Jo-Ann’s this time. I wasn’t sure I liked it at > first, but I’m warming to it. I got it to use at Saturday night’s gig – a > country club’s annual summer party for members & families – but I barely had > enough people for a decent Galopede. > > > > Tony Parkes > > Billerica, Mass. > > www.hands4.com http://www.hands4.com/ > > New book! Square Dance Calling: An Old Art for a New Century > > (available now) > > > > > > From: Neal Schlein via Contra Callers <[email protected]> > Sent: Wednesday, July 5, 2023 12:32 AM > To: Mac Mckeever <[email protected]> > Cc: Shared Weight Callers <[email protected]> > Subject: [Callers] Re: calling weddings > > > > Second the Grand March, super simple square-ish dance, and some kind of > Virginia Reel—especially for more thematic weddings. Also a scatter > promenade (WITH partner), Big Circle with no partners needed, and La > Bastringue. > > > > I would not bother with ballroom swings, and building to a contra is only > relevant if that’s what the couple wants and they are specifically inviting > people to a DANCE. > > > > One thing I haven’t seen mentioned is Favor of the Rose: it is an absolute > favorite of mine and my dance community. > > > > Favor of the Rose > > > > -Line up three chairs and get a rose (or whatever). > > -Form two lines of people, one on either side (any criteria, inequal is 💯 > fine). > > -Position the bride or groom in the middle chair and give them the rose. > > -Bring two people from one line and have them sit. Center person gives rose > to one, dances up center with the other. > > -Remaining person moves to center chair. Repeat, alternating lines. > > > > Neal Schlein > > > > > > On Tue, Jul 4, 2023 at 3:14 PM Mac Mckeever via Contra Callers > <[email protected] > mailto:[email protected]> wrote: > > > > > I always start with a grand march - no teaching and eases some of the fear > > of doing other dances > > > > > > > > You can put the bride and groom in the second slot and announce they > > request participation from all guests > > > > > > > > Mac > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, July 4, 2023 at 04:10:09 PM CDT, Rich Sbardella via Contra > > Callers <[email protected] > > mailto:[email protected]> wrote: > > > > > > > > > > > > I am enjoying this thread. > > > > > > > > I have called weddings with a full dance floor with long periods of > > dancing, and others which have a few dancers who only dance for a short > > period. I had always felt like I failed when I did not get the > > participation I imagined, but I too have learned that our dances flavor the > > event, but we are not the main attraction. > > > > > > > > I do not generally require deposits for party dances, but I do for weddings > > and outdoor events. I had a wedding to call last month that was cancelled > > about seven days before the scheduled date, and without an explanation. It > > was the first time in 30 years that I kept a deposit, and I am still > > conflicted about it. Any previous cancellations were weather related, and > > I applied the deposit to a rescheduled event. > > > > > > > > I have also called several wedding rehearsal dances, and generally get > > great participation from the attendees. > > > > > > > > One of my favorite dances for weddings and rehearsal dinners is Rural > > Felicity. > > > > At such events I rename the dance to Tunnel of Love, and I have the Bride > > and Groom as the 1st Top Couple. > > > > > > > > A1 LL F&B, Top Pair Sashay to foot > > > > A2 LL F&B, Same Pair Sashay to top > > > > B1 P DSD, 2 Hand Turn and Make an Arch (Tunnel) > > > > B2 Top Pair lead down under the Arches > > > > > > > > I have a wedding to call this weekend, and I am looking forward to it. > > > > > > > > Rich Sbardella > > > > Stafford Springs, CT > > > > > > > > On Tue, Jul 4, 2023 at 2:43 PM Erik Hoffman via Contra Callers > > <[email protected] > > mailto:[email protected]> wrote: > > > > > > > > I, too, have called for a lot of parties and weddings. Keeping it > > > simple—whole set dances such as The Virginia Reel (without the reel). > > > > > > > > > > > > And, I actually wrote a book about it: Old-Time Dance Calling for > > > Weddings, Parties, and One-Night Stands. > > > > > > > > > > > > I do differentiate weddings from other parties that are organized around > > > the idea that there will be a dance, such as schools, some sort of a > > > club, or even a birthday party: > > > > > > > > > > > > Weddings are to gather families and friends of the Bride & Groom to get > > > together and meet each other—often for the first time—and get a chance to > > > get to know each other. Weddings are not to get together to dance. We > > > callers serve a wonderful service to use dance to get these friends and > > > families to interact with each other. > > > > > > > > > > > > Tony says he rarely uses a mixer at a wedding. Maybe it’s that I live in > > > Oakland, California, and don’t often go far from the “Liberal” west. I > > > always start simple circle left, circle right, into the center & back X2, > > > Swing Somebody (elbow swing or two hand swing). I might add: and > > > Promenade. End with: … “into the middle if you’ve just got married!” Then > > > the Virginia Reel. > > > > > > > > > > > > Often, after that the dancing crowd gets a lot thinner. One of the first > > > weddings I called, I think I got trough three dances. After that, waltzes > > > and tunes. I thought, “I barely did anything…” Then I got the thank you > > > notes: Comments about how great the dance created what the bride and > > > groom wanted. I started realizing at weddings we’re offering a service of > > > helping people connect with each other, and that can be successful with > > > two or three dances. If people use the rest of the time to talk with each > > > other, the job can be done. > > > > > > > > > > > > That’s not to say I’ve called a lot of weddings when it’s clear a number > > > of guests want to keep dancing, and might even get to one hands-four > > > dance as Haste to the Wedding or Jefferson & Liberty, but that’s a > > > judgement call. It’s just that many times two or three dances brings > > > people together in ways other dance forms often fail to do. > > > > > > > > > > > > ~Erik Hoffman > > > > > > Oakland, CA > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > From: Tony Parkes via Contra Callers > > > <[email protected] > > > mailto:[email protected]> > > > Sent: Tuesday, July 4, 2023 7:31 AM > > > To: Shared Weight Callers <[email protected] > > > mailto:[email protected]> > > > Subject: [Callers] Re: calling weddings > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > It looks as if we’re all agreed that *really* easy dances are the way to > > > go at weddings (and similar events where no one is there to learn), but > > > disagree on what constitutes “really easy.” > > > > > > > > > > > > The sequence that John Rogers describes is similar to the Scatter Sanita > > > that I use at nearly every one-nighter, including weddings. But I think > > > the loss of original partner would feel to most wedding guests like “one > > > thing too many” – and a much bigger “thing” than any of the moves such as > > > dosido or swing. > > > > > > > > > > > > At all my one-nighters – heck, at all my events, including contra-series > > > dances – I use a combination of (1) my best pre-event guess of what’s > > > needed, based on my experience with similar events, and (2) reading the > > > room when I get there. Although I absolutely love mixers (and always call > > > one at series dances, though I know a few contra dancers say they dislike > > > them), my sense is that wedding guests feel shaky enough about joining in > > > the dancing and that losing their partner and having to search for a new > > > one would add a major dose of shakiness with nothing positive to > > > compensate. If I use any mixer at all, it will likely be Heel and Toe > > > (aka Pattycake Polka), where the next partner is right there and they > > > don’t have to decide on one – and although I use it fairly often at > > > one-nighters, I’m much less likely to use it at weddings. > > > > > > > > > > > > Time allowed for dancing: I’ve found that at the vast majority of my > > > one-nighters, including weddings, I end up doing either 2 or 3 sets of > > > 30-40 minutes each, usually 2. (The first one is often a bit longer than > > > the others, as it takes a while to get everyone quiet and listening.) So > > > I tell the couple (or whoever is my contact) in advance that that’s what > > > I envision, but that it’s subject to modifying as things unfold. My > > > average is probably about 6 dance numbers total, but a few times I’ve > > > done only the initial big circle and a Virginia Reel; once I did only the > > > big circle. It’s important to remember that the organizers and guests > > > have no preconceived idea of what constitutes a dance event; they’re not > > > expecting 12 aerobic dances and a waltz. You may feel you haven’t earned > > > your keep, but the clients are more than satisfied. (I always make it > > > clear that I’m willing to call as long as there are a few couples who > > > want to dance; almost never do I get taken up on the offer.) > > > > > > > > > > > > Every caller will have a slightly different way of turning vision into > > > reality (and that’s as it should be with a folk art), but hopefully > > > always with a view to what will give the greatest number of people a > > > taste of the joy that we know is there in the dance. > > > > > > > > > > > > Tony Parkes > > > > > > Billerica, Mass. > > > > > > www.hands4.com http://www.hands4.com/ > > > > > > New book! Square Dance Calling: An Old Art for a New Century > > > > > > (available now) > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > From: Adam Carlson via Contra Callers > > > <[email protected] > > > mailto:[email protected]> > > > Sent: Tuesday, July 4, 2023 2:24 AM > > > To: Shared Weight Callers <[email protected] > > > mailto:[email protected]> > > > Subject: [Callers] Re: calling weddings > > > > > > > > > > > > Heck, even that sounds too complex. Forming circles of 4, finding another > > > group, that took too long, what am I doing now, which one's my partner > > > again, and which is my opposite? Nah, Stick with longways lines, circles > > > and couple mixers until and unless people seem like they're actually into > > > it and want something more complicated. > > > > > > > > > > > > On Mon, Jul 3, 2023 at 10:26 PM John Rogers via Contra Callers > > > <[email protected] > > > mailto:[email protected]> wrote: > > > > > > > > > > > I’ll add two points of my own. I was once hired to call dances at a > > > > wedding and I didn’t find out until the bride and groom emerged from > > > > the chapel that the whole dance idea was orchestrated by others as a > > > > surprise for the bride and groom. Since them I have had a strict > > > > policy that no matters who hires me, I WILL discuss the program > > > > directly with the bride. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The other thing I have learned about “one night stands” is to always > > > > try to imagine the mindset of one of the participants as they enter the > > > > room. Are they looking forward to a dance program, or are they there > > > > for other reasons. (Weddings fall heavily in the “for other reasons” > > > > category.) Unless it is the wedding of two contradancers and everybody > > > > there is a dancer, keep in mind that participants did not come to the > > > > event thinking they were going to learn anything that day. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My last point (which follows from the above) is that there is no dance > > > > that is too simple to call at a wedding. It is very easy to call a > > > > dance that is too hard, but impossible to call one that is too simple. > > > > To give an example, this simple scatter mixer works extremely well at > > > > weddings: Circle left, circle right. Men DSD, Ladies DSD. Partner DSD, > > > > Opposites L elbow swing, Scoop up opposite and promenade to find a > > > > different opposite couple. (This is plenty complex enough to be > > > > entertaining at a wedding!) > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Good luck! > > > > > > > > Sent from my iPhone > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Jul 3, 2023, at 4:07 PM, Roberta Kogut via Contra Callers > > > > > <[email protected] > > > > > mailto:[email protected]> wrote: > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I agree with a lot of what was said. I'll just add a couple of > > > > > things. > > > > > > > > > > I always talk to the wedding couple, or mother or whoever is hiring > > > > > me and make sure I know their expectations and they know mine. If > > > > > they are serious contra dancers, I always make sure they understand > > > > > that a dance like what they are used to is not probably going to > > > > > happen. I also ask that they pass on to wedding guests that it is > > > > > the couples wish that their guests will dance together and wear or > > > > > bring appropriate shoes. I always start off with something like La > > > > > Bastringue. Keep it easy and fun. Don't go too long on any dance, > > > > > but long enough that they really get it and are having fun. I love > > > > > doing mixers because they keep the guests mingling together. I think > > > > > that really pleases the B & G. > > > > > > > > > > I usually see a lot of people turned on to contra, so I do tell > > > > > people that if they have had a lot of fun they should "google" > > > > > 'contra dancing near me' when they get home, stressing that a regular > > > > > contra dance can be found all over the country. I try to stay as > > > > > invisible as I can so it's really about the wedding couple and their > > > > > family and friends. > > > > > > > > > > Spread the love! > > > > > > > > > > Roberta Kogut > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Get TypeApp for Android http://www.typeapp.com/r > > > > > > > > > > On Jul 3, 2023, at 5:44 PM, Lorraine Sutton via Contra Callers > > > > > <[email protected] > > > > > mailto:[email protected]> wrote: > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Hi > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I have done a lot of weddings.... > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Keep it very, very simple...yes... Barn dance, family dance, > > > > > > community dance dances,. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Never any contras ...too much work ...it all needs to be fun. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Have the Bride and Groom done any trad dancing before this event? > > > > > > If not, do impress on them that it is pretty essential that they > > > > > > dance the full first set otherwise their guests will not feel > > > > > > required to do so. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Two hand turn not a swing ...too hard to teach ( especially if they > > > > > > have been drinking) > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Let the B & G know that they should let their guests know that > > > > > > there will be traditional dancing and their participation is > > > > > > expected. Have them ask the women to bring shoes for dancing > > > > > > ...flats , lace up s, NO FLIP FLOPS or stiletto hells. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Alcohol ...well ...Impress at some point that Booze does not help > > > > > > you dance ..... > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Space....the standard " floor" in a wedding tent is never big > > > > > > enough, so ask for a min of 40 square feet. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Charge what is a decent fee (and if you have to drive more than 1.5 > > > > > > hours each way charge a gas fee) > > > > > > > > > > > > or you will not be valued...Last Time I checked a DJ was charging > > > > > > about $1,000 a night. Do you have a relaxed band (only need 2 > > > > > > fiddle and keyboard) and if so can they bring the sound system? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Lots of mixers....long way sets ...1 active couple ( ie Virginia > > > > > > Reel, Bridge of Athlone etc) > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Easy Sicilian Circles...to have them practice right and left elbow, > > > > > > do-si-do etc > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Will there be small children ...another issue. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Timing ...Every wedding I have ever done is late ...speeches run > > > > > > over time, catering gets delayed.etc. etc. etc. You may be invited > > > > > > to take part in the dinner, however that usually means another > > > > > > extra 2-3 hours before the dance... Once after waiting more than an > > > > > > extra hour I let the MC know that ( given we had been paid , and > > > > > > we each had a 2 hour drive home) that we would be leaving in 15 > > > > > > minutes if he did not get speeches wrapped up. Harsh but real. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Good Luck.... > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Lorraine Sutton Ontario, Canada > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Mon, Jul 3, 2023 at 4:30 PM Jerome Grisanti via Contra Callers > > > > > > <[email protected] > > > > > > mailto:[email protected]> wrote: > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I would release any idea that wedding guests will have any > > > > > > > interest in dancing beyond this event. Keep things VERY simple. > > > > > > > You can do an hour with dances containing only allemandes, > > > > > > > do-si-dos, circles and promenades. Maybe a modified swing/2-hand > > > > > > > turn. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Mon, Jul 3, 2023, 3:53 PM Joe Harrington via Contra Callers > > > > > > > <[email protected] > > > > > > > mailto:[email protected]> wrote: > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Any advice for calling weddings? I've been asked to call my > > > > > > > > first one and I don't see a lot of wedding-specific advice > > > > > > > > online. What do you ask them in advance, how do you approach > > > > > > > > it, what are good dances to call? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm assuming that a workshop is impractical, so it's barn > > > > > > > > dances and maybe working up to a contra by the end? Try to > > > > > > > > teach a swing? Some advice I've gotten so far: > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Band - can they play contras, am I DJing instead, if so what > > > > > > > > kind of music, trad or pop? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Floor - make sure it's big enough, get length, width, and > > > > > > > > surface > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Sound system - what is it and is there a sound tech? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Duration - how long they'll want to dance > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Dancers - how many, any experienced guests? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Special dances - first, parents, bouquet, last? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Will the bride and groom dance? (If not, nobody will) > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Will there be alcohol? (one person suggested doubling the fee > > > > > > > > if there is) > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Will many women be in high heels? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I welcome any advice! My main goal in taking wedding gigs is > > > > > > > > recruiting new dancers to our local scene, if that matters. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Thanks, > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > --jh-- > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > _______________________________________________ > > > > > > > > Contra Callers mailing list -- > > > > > > > > [email protected] > > > > > > > > mailto:[email protected] > > > > > > > > To unsubscribe send an email to > > > > > > > > [email protected] > > > > > > > > mailto:[email protected] > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > _______________________________________________ > > > > > > > Contra Callers mailing list -- > > > > > > > [email protected] > > > > > > > mailto:[email protected] > > > > > > > To unsubscribe send an email to > > > > > > > [email protected] > > > > > > > mailto:[email protected] > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > --------------------------------------------- > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Contra Callers mailing list -- [email protected] > > > > > > mailto:[email protected] > > > > > > To unsubscribe send an email to > > > > > > [email protected] > > > > > > mailto:[email protected] > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > _______________________________________________ > > > > > Contra Callers mailing list -- [email protected] > > > > > mailto:[email protected] > > > > > To unsubscribe send an email to > > > > > [email protected] > > > > > mailto:[email protected] > > > > > > > > > > > > > _______________________________________________ > > > > Contra Callers mailing list -- [email protected] > > > > mailto:[email protected] > > > > To unsubscribe send an email to > > > > [email protected] > > > > mailto:[email protected] > > > > > > > > > > _______________________________________________ > > > Contra Callers mailing list -- [email protected] > > > mailto:[email protected] > > > To unsubscribe send an email to > > > [email protected] > > > mailto:[email protected] > > > > > > > _______________________________________________ > > Contra Callers mailing list -- [email protected] > > mailto:[email protected] > > To unsubscribe send an email to [email protected] > > mailto:[email protected] > > > > _______________________________________________ > > Contra Callers mailing list -- [email protected] > > mailto:[email protected] > > To unsubscribe send an email to [email protected] > > mailto:[email protected] > > > > -- > > Neal Schlein > > Librarian, MSLIS > > _______________________________________________ > Contra Callers mailing list -- [email protected] > To unsubscribe send an email to [email protected] >
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