You are welcome Sean and all you can do keep praying and put it in God hands 
and he  will take care of everything for you.
addison 

O. Addison Gethers
e-mail address : [EMAIL PROTECTED] or [EMAIL PROTECTED]
window live messenger: [EMAIL PROTECTED] aim: durangoadd64 skype: cowboys62 
yahoo messenger: OADDISONGETHERS
 
  ----- Original Message ----- 
  From: Sean Ray 
  To: [email protected] 
  Sent: Thursday, December 04, 2008 4:58 PM
  Subject: {dbilg} Re: I feel numb and anxious.


  Amen... thank you so much Addison.

  Friends,
  Sean
    ----- Original Message ----- 
    From: O.Addison Gethers 
    To: [email protected] 
    Sent: Thursday, December 04, 2008 6:38 AM
    Subject: {dbilg} Re: I feel numb and anxious.


    Hello Sean,
    I will prayed for you with your financial and others thing you requestd 
,because you have the confident in yourself in faith of God ,the more you pray 
to God about your situation ,I truly believe he will give you the answer and 
will lead you in the right direction in life 
    addison 
     d 
    O. Addison Gethers
    e-mail address : [EMAIL PROTECTED] or [EMAIL PROTECTED]
    window live messenger: [EMAIL PROTECTED] aim: durangoadd64 skype: cowboys62 
yahoo messenger: OADDISONGETHERS
     
      ----- Original Message ----- 
      From: Sean Ray 
      To: [EMAIL PROTECTED] 
      Sent: Thursday, December 04, 2008 3:57 AM
      Subject: {dbilg} I feel numb and anxious.


      Today was an interesting day. I knew that it would be because we had to 
ride on the bus with throw-up someone left while they exited the bus. I don't 
have a strong tummy drum for that kind of thing. We had to drive to where we 
were going  with that smell. 
      I was preparing for todays meting and trying to do some research while 
colleen and Todd were out there visiting. colleen had brought her cocateal with 
her. they were doing something and he seemed really testy. I heard Todd say, 
"no bites." I didn't think anything about it. I heard colleen talking to her 
bird softly. I heard him making noises. I just thought that they were working 
together. Suddenly, colleen tells Todd that her bird isn't breathing. 
Instantly, I was feeling the blood drain out of my face and body. I didn't know 
what had happened. I still don't really know what happened. I didn't see it. I 
wasn't out there... I don't know. I thought, "No, not colleen's bird dying in 
our house." He was dead without explanation. Colleen was in tears. I felt 
responsible for his death some how so Todd and I scrabbled around to find her 
another bird because Colleen was in more and more tears land. She saind, "I 
can't face that empty cage alone." We found one that had been hand trained and 
hand fed. I again begged her to get some professional training with the bird. I 
just made it very emphatic for her to please not rely on me for guidance and 
answers. I don't know that much and am learning myself. It's very different 
training a dog than a bird. 

      We found her this bird and we really couldn't afford to get it but we did 
anyway because I couldn't stand to see Colleen so heart broken and I couldn't 
bare it that she lost it at our house. So, please pray for our finances? that's 
an anxiety too. Todd burried the bird alone in the cold backyard. he thought 
that he heard Boo churp and unburried him just to rediscover that he was  dead. 
How awful for him. We had this meeting for the netertainment committee that got 
started an hour late. Oh, I don't even know how I managed to get through that. 
By God's grace--I did.

      Now everyone has left and I have begun to worry about my own babies. I 
can't go through another death right now. I can't I can't! I won't! I'm so 
upset I don't know what to do with myself. I'm always careful with my babies. I 
try to be anyway. whoever said that ignorance was bliss must have been drunk, 
crazy, or plain stupid. Ignorance can kill... that's not bliss. I don't every 
want to hear that quote as long as I live. 

      when I heard that boo had passed it scared me so badly. Then I cried more 
for Colleen. I can't believe it! this is so unreal!  when I handle my doves, I 
do everything the website says to the letter. I've tried asking professionals 
but a lot of them don't know about doves. I want there to be no way I could be 
ignorant. Please pray that these babies will stay healthy. I believe in God and 
I am also freaking out. 

      then I think that there might be something bad happening at ILR and 
that's got me in a twist as well. She said that we didn't do anything wrong. 
When Todd said that he thought it would be something positive I felt a little 
better and told my supervisor so. Then she replied back in an email for me not 
to get too excited or I'll be disappointed.  the sound of that statement made 
me anxious, but she said Ha at the end of her sentence. so I don't know if 
she's joking. don't know what I'll find or hear on Friday. I feel like a light 
weight when it comes to handling problems. these all seem like small potatoes 
but tonight, right here in this moment, they are huge. Please pray that no one 
else has to die?  I feel like I can't hear God clearly right now. I don't like 
that either as it's so confusing. If I never go through this again it will be 
too soon! Oh, I could use a lot of prayer right now. thanks everyone.  

      ysic,
      Sean


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