The Diamond Pickaxe was a tavern located in
southwestern Rak that was populated almost exclusively
by dwarven miners. As Jaref Thoran and his sack full
of Suldio's bones entered through a door which had a
dagger stuck halfway through it, they saw that inside
this tavern were a dozen or so drunken dwarves, all
praising Queen Janessa in drunken song despite the
fact that it was most likely nearly the fifth hour of
the morning.
Jaref made his way to the bar with his luggage thrown
over his shoulder. Suldio had said that his toe was
inside somewhere, buried benieth the tavern in the
ground below it. The floors were made of wooden
planks which did not look terribly sturdy, thank the
gods. In fact, the whole tavern shook as the dwarves
erupted into a roar of laughter and gleeful cursing.
"It's right in front of us," Jaref heard Suldio say
from within the burlap sack.
"It's behind the bar, then." Jaref whispered back.
"What was that?" asked a voice from Jaref's side.
He turned to see a younger looking white bearded dwarf
who was completely covered in dust. Across the front
of his shirt were muddy streaks where he had spilt
dwarven ale on himself. The dwarf looked up at Jaref
with a glare.
"I said," Jaref sputtered for a moment while he
thought of a story. "I was wondering of you and your
friends would like something from the bar."
"You're buying?"
"I am."
"Hey fellas," the dwarf turned and yelled back at
the others, who seemed to be busy organizing an arm
wrestling match, "This guy's buying us a round!"
A great tavern-shaking roar rolled at Jaref like and
ocean wave, and dwarves were suddenly surrounding him,
patting him on the shoulders and head.
"Song, song, song," came the chant from the dwarves.
"You bought the ale," yelled the white bearded
dwarf, "That means you pick the song, stranger."
"Er," Jaref wheeled around and looked at all the
laughing dwarf faces around him, finally facing as
most of them as possible. "Alright, how about 'Pinched
Your Sister's Bum'?"
The dwarves cheered and went back to their table
where a very tired-looking human barkeep was already
lining up tankards of dwarven ale for his customers.
The barkeep was a thin, pale man with narrow lips and
thinning black hair.
"You've got the money for this, right?" growled the
barkeep as he handed Jaref his own full tankard.
"Aye," Jaref sighed as he reached for his purse
which was, suprisingly enough, still hanging from his
neck. He produced a palmfull of silver and handed it
to the barkeep.
Finally organized, the dwarves lifted their tankards
high and began to sing "Pinched Your Sister's Bum":
"Tum, tum, tum
"I pinched your sister's bum
"Then I 'gun to run
"Hey!"
The song was merely a repetition of this chorus,
over and over again until the singer decides to stop.
Tankards swung and clacked against each other while
the dwarves swayed in song, rocking the rickety tavern
from side to side.
"Not a very complex song, is it?" Jaref heard Suldio
ask.
"It's a classic," replied Jaref as he huddled over
his tankard, facing away from the crowd. He quickly
poured his tankard onto Suldio's bag while it seemed
no one was paying attention.
"Hey!" whined Suldio.
"Shush," Jaref said with a snicker as he slammed his
empty tankard onto the bartop.
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