Some fairly detailed suggestions. Feel free to take what you like. - New shell animations has landed, for example a brand new close animation and (??). + New shell animations have landed including a brand new close animation.
- The GNOME theme has also been re-written giving improvement to a lot of visual decorations, to make your apps look even greater. + The GNOME theme has been revamped to improve many visuals, making your apps look even better! - Over the summer, Maps has gained routing support, Photos has gained photo sharing support and Music has gained playlist support to mention a few [show quick-feature]. + Over the summer Maps gained navigation routing, Photos gained phtoo sharing, and Music gained playlist support. However, I generally follow the sentences should have 15 words or less guideline. Possibly worth breaking those each into their own sentence. - Furthermore, a new game has landed called Hitori which can be installed from GNOME Software. + Furthermore, a new game has landed called Hitori which can be installed using the GNOME Software application. - With 3.14, developers can look forward to a more comfortable development environment too. + With GNOME 3.14, developers can look forward to a more comfortable development environment. - GTK has focused on improving the developer experience and will continue to do so. + GTK has begun an ongoing effort to improve the developer experience. - More documentation has also been created, among others the GNOME 3 Human Interfaces Guidelines which has been released along with 3.14. + More documentation was added, including a brand new set of Human Interfaces Guidelines targeting GNOME 3.14. - And multi-touch support has landed for you to utilize in your app. + To further hardware enablement, multi-touch has been added in GTK to support gestures. I'm okay with the Builder line I guess. I don't want to seem like I'm hijacking 3.14 release notes for something that, while under the GNOME umbrella, is a selfish effort of my own desires :-) - GNOME 3.14 has gained Clipboard support on Wayland and we're pushing to have good tablet, keyboard and touch support through libinput. + GNOME 3.14 has gained Clipboard support on Wayland. We're advancing libinput to improve the experience on keyboards, tablets, and touch. ^ Not sure on this one, is someone from GNOME contributing to libinput development? - Wayland is an important step towards a more secure and private GNOME desktop. + Wayland is an important step towards a more secure and privacy enabling GNOME desktop. - Many distributions will ship GNOME 3.14 the next few months. + Many distributions will ship GNOME 3.14 the upcoming months. - Or come join us making our next GNOME release even greater [link to GetInvolved]. We look forward to get you started. + Come join us making the next GNOME release even greater! [link] We look forward to helping you get started! -- Christian On 08/17/2014 02:28 AM, Bastian Hougaard wrote: > Hi Engagement, > > I finished writing a rough draft for the 3.14 release video. It would be > great if you could read the manuscript through, make any corrections, > re-write sentences, come with suggestions or questions (here or in the > feedback section). > > https://wiki.gnome.org/BastianIls%C3%B8/ReleaseVideoG3.14#Manuscript > > > What do you think? > > -bastianilso > > > > _______________________________________________ > engagement-list mailing list > [email protected] > https://mail.gnome.org/mailman/listinfo/engagement-list > _______________________________________________ engagement-list mailing list [email protected] https://mail.gnome.org/mailman/listinfo/engagement-list
