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You all may have seen these before, but hope you enjoy
them anyway.
Spook
The 33 Greatest Lies in Aviation
1. I'm from the FAA and I'm here to help you.
2. Me? I've never busted minimums.
3. We will be on time, maybe even early.
4. Pardon me, ma'am, I seem to have lost my jet keys.
5 .I have no interest in flying for the airlines.
6. I fixed it right the first time, it must have
failed for other reasons.
7. All that turbulence spoiled my landing.
8. I'm a member of the mile high club.
9. I only need glasses for reading.
10. I broke out right at minimums.
11. The weather is gonna be alright; it's clearing to
VFR.
12. Don't worry about the weight and balance -- it'll
fly.
13. If we get a little lower I think we'll see the
lights.
14. I'm 22, got 6000 hours, a four year degree & 3000
hours in a Lear.
15. We shipped the part yesterday.
16. I'd love to have a woman co-pilot.
17. All you have to do is follow the book.
18. This plane outperforms the book by 20 percent.
19. We in aviation are overpaid, underworked and well
respected.
20. Oh sure, no problem, I've got over 2000 hours in
that aircraft.
21. I have 5000 hours total time, 3200 are actual
instrument.
22. No need to look that up, I've got it all
memorized.
23. Sure I can fly it -- it has wings, doesn't it?
24. We'll be home by lunchtime.
25. Your plane will be ready by 2 o'clock.
26. I'm always glad to see the FAA.
27. We fly every day -- we don't need recurrent
training.
28. It just came out of annual -- how could anything
be wrong?
29. I thought YOU took care of that.
30. I've got the field in sight.
31. I've got the traffic in sight.
32. Of course I know where we are.
33. I'm SURE the gear was down.
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